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Newest Member: qwerty22 (45695)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: How long is long enough?
♀ Member
Member # 42096
Default  Posted: 10:05 AM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Grrrr- speaking of decision making. I just got a text saying "i'm thinking about keeping the boys home from their ski lessons tomorrow to watch gold medal hockey game (from canada, eh? :) ) - thoughts?

Godddd. He pays for the fucking lessons.

"Your day with them- do what you like."
Was my response.

In my head "maybe you should text me next time you need to wipe your ass so I can tell you how."

"But stand still is all I did
Love like ours is never fixed
Still I stuck around
I did behave
I saved you every time
I was a fool for love
I was a fool for love"

Posts: 294 | Registered: Jan 2014
♀ Member
Member # 10506
Default  Posted: 10:49 AM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do the KIDS want to watch the hockey game? Is it important to them? Or is it something WS wants to do and so does not want to be bothered with their lessons?

If you think this is something the kids want, then there is nothing wrong with allowing it because it is a once every 4 years thing. If not, then insist they go to their lesson even if you have to bring them. You do not want to set a presidence that WS can cancel what is best for the kids just because it is not convenient for him. And if you do have to take the kids to lessons, make sure you document this. In fact, you need to start to document everything regarding his visitation and contact with the kids. That way if he tries to go for 50/50 custody just to avoid CS then you can show proof that he has not stepped up to the plate for the kids and does not deserve 50/50.

edited because autocorrect changed "presidence" to "preciseness", which makes no sense

[This message edited by Dreamboat at 11:23 AM, February 22nd (Saturday)]

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

Posts: 17695 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: A better place :)
♀ Member
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 6:26 PM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

FOR ONCE I want him to make a fucking decision.

I think he's deciding he wants cake. He's keeping you as his plan B & acting like a single guy.

Protect YOU and YOUR children. Like others have said, if it takes a year, you can stop the process IF he starts to get it.

I understand your thought that he's going to snap out of it (at some magic point in the future). I did the same w/my XH.

All the delaying on my end first (his later) was allow OW to get her claws deeper in, fill his fool head w/even MORE nonsense & reinforce his selfish, entitled attitude. I wasted those YEARS hoping & praying for a magic moment when I could have focused on moving forward instead.

I wouldn't give him any notice of your plans at all. I would file on Monday, and look toward a future without your H.


Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 773 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
Topic Posts: 23
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