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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Sad to be back
FREEFALLNOCHUTE
♀ Member
Member # 21003
Default  Posted: 9:31 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well it seems we have come full circle after taking him back after cheating and again after his arrest for hitting me I just find out he's had cancer for about a year now! His reason for not telling me is the same reasons he cheated and so after 6 years we start this crap all over again. He set me up good this time and I am much worse off than I wouldst been the first time.




Posts: 1530 | Registered: Sep 2008
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry.


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7706 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 9:39 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((freefall)))) I'm so very sorry, honey.


You can call me NIK

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
- Plato


Posts: 24437 | Registered: Aug 2011
FREEFALLNOCHUTE
♀ Member
Member # 21003
Default  Posted: 9:56 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And now to top it all off he told my best friend he wants my kids to be with him!




Posts: 1530 | Registered: Sep 2008
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 9:59 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((FFNC))) I missed you and thought about you often.

What kind of cancer does he say he has? Why would it be in the best interests of your kids to be with him? Can he properly care for them while fighting cancer?


Posts: 11407 | Registered: Mar 2008
careerlady
♀ Member
Member # 16958
Default  Posted: 10:34 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wait so you are here because he didn't tell you about his cancer or did he cheat again. He told your best friend he wants a divorce and full custody or what? The post was a little terse for me


Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Summary: http://youtu.be/iaysTVcounI

Posts: 935 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Northern California
FREEFALLNOCHUTE
♀ Member
Member # 21003
Default  Posted: 10:54 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He has thyroid and testicular cancer... we had been doing really well however the dealbreaker is he lied to me for over a year. He's been having treatments for a year. He doesn't want a divorce and according to him the kids are less stressed with him. I am more vocal about things than he is. But he works to much and there's that whole arrest thing... I am just really hurt that we went through all of that and he didn't learn a damned thing! I wanna makecit clear I am not leaving him cause he's sick it's the dishonesty. I found out while we were arguing and he told me I was such a bad wife I didn't notice he was sick! He told me he was on a weight loss program and I didn't question him in further. So he hid it from me then tells me i'm a bad wife for not helping him! We are both working emergency jobs and hardly see each other so no I didn't see the difference and the weight loss he said was due to the program




Posts: 1530 | Registered: Sep 2008
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 11:08 PM, February 21st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Can you verify his cancer status? I've seen a LOT of cancer and something seems off, here, to me.

Posts: 11407 | Registered: Mar 2008
FREEFALLNOCHUTE
♀ Member
Member # 21003
Default  Posted: 12:01 AM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not really he has not included me in any of that and due to hipa laws they won't release info to me




Posts: 1530 | Registered: Sep 2008
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 12:16 AM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So, he lost weight. Did he have times where he was VERY sick?

Posts: 11407 | Registered: Mar 2008
FREEFALLNOCHUTE
♀ Member
Member # 21003
Default  Posted: 6:26 AM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just once with a sinus infection but he's a fireman so I don't see him that often




Posts: 1530 | Registered: Sep 2008
turtle72
♀ Member
Member # 21773
Default  Posted: 7:06 AM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My BIL told me sister he had lung cancer to make her back down from a fight after his A. He didn't have cancer. Told her how horrible she was for selfishly thinking of herself while he bravely fought this alone. (This was 15 years ago and I might kick him in the balls when I see him tomorrow.)

Whether your H has cancer or not, the outcome is he lied, majorly. I am so sorry.


Me: 41 BS/WW/BS
2 kids 9 & 11, 3 steps 20, 8 and 3
BS 1st DDay 10/14/08, 5 mo. PA w/ MOW
WW 2nd D-Day 3/22/10, my exit A with HS BF
Separated 4/19/10
Married H #2 10/8/11
BS latest Dday 12/28/13 - PA w/ single COW

Posts: 2207 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Massachusetts
BAB61
♀ Member
Member # 41181
Default  Posted: 10:43 AM, February 22nd (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sounds fishy to me too. I would be asking for medical records to verify his claims. How can he care for kids if he's doing cancer treatments? They wipe you out for at least a full day, and sometimes 2 or 3. I know more than a few people doing radiation and chemo. It's not something you can do and continue to be a fully operational fireman. That job is way too physical. I call bullshit!


Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

Posts: 1271 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: DE
Penny2013
♀ New Member
Member # 39320
Default  Posted: 6:51 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi , I have a brother going through Chemo right now and he works as a assembly man in a factory and he had to stop working about 4 - 6 weeks into it because it wipes him out so much. Chemo trashes your immune system and makes you very week. His taste buds are shot and cant taste anything my sister in law cooks for him. I too think he is BS-ing. this is something I would not put past my WS.

Good Luck. I would push to see proof. I also agree he cant take care of kids. You may be more vocal now, but with him out of your marriage I'm sure you would be happy and not finding the need to get more vocal.


Penny2013

Posts: 17 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Western , Mass
Topic Posts: 14

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