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Newest Member: brokenandempty (44699)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Get the f&*% out of my life!
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 2:54 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So DD informed me this morning that the Gnat and Hello Kitty have joined an expensive health club in our area. Of course they have, nothing but the best for those assholes. Now why does this bother me? Well, this is the health club that literally ALL of my friends belong to. I'm not rich enough to join, but I go a lot on their passes. The last time I was there I was talking with the manager and she suggested I get a job at the front desk. I wouldn't make a lot of money, but they provide free childcare while I'm working and I'd get a free membership. Sold and sold. I could use a little extra money.

So now, I don't want anything to do with that place. The Gnat knows that my friends all go there and that I'm there a lot. I feel like I can't hang out with my friends there nor work there anymore. Why the hell can't these two assholes get out of my life? There are numerous other health clubs that they could join, but they want the best. They spare no expense when it comes to themselves. My friends keep saying to screw them and take the job anyway. However, there will be no way to avoid them and emotionally and simply can't handle that right now.

The other thing that pisses me off is that DD's tuition to hold her space at school for next Fall is due next month. It is $2200. When I told the Gnat he acted like he was going to really have to scrape up that kind of money. Oh, but this health club membership costs about that much just to start up. Of course, there were no issues paying for that.

I just can't have peace with them. I want to move away and just have a different life. I hate them so much.


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 878 | Registered: Mar 2013
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 2:57 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

****sending internet death rays to the gnat and hello kitty*****


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4086 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 3:00 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ha ha, Norabird. I so hope those deathrays reach them soon!


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 878 | Registered: Mar 2013
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882
Default  Posted: 3:06 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, yuck, that would feel so invasive to me too!

I hope Norabird's death rays hit them!


me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC

Divorced 1/17/2013

"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."


Posts: 2585 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: MA
devistatedmom
♀ Member
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 3:09 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I say take the job. Your friends are there, you want to be there, and they suck. How about instead of you being uncomfortable about them being there, THEY can be uncomfortable about being around you. It will be obvious, since all your friends are there, how much you are liked and respected, while they are given a wide berth. I bet they will stop coming because they are uncomfortable being around you.


BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.


Posts: 5416 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
sparkysable
♀ Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 3:14 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would take the job anyway.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3303 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
scarednbroken
♀ Member
Member # 41961
Default  Posted: 3:38 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree with devastated. Take the job. Don't let them rule your life anymore!! I think they will be driven aside also.


BS: Me 44 WH: 50 Kids: 13, 15, 17, 28 DD: every yr Ow: tons Status: fed-up. A woman should never invest in a relationship she wouldn't want for her daughter, nor should she allow any man to treat her in a way she would scold her son for

Posts: 417 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Midwest
mamazen
♀ Member
Member # 42137
Default  Posted: 3:40 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree with devistatedmom----you are giving away your power to the gnat! This is YOUR turf--your friends are there, you are respected, and you now are part of the staff----let HIM be the uncomfortable one around you.

I know how hard it will be though. When I think of running into WH AP I get sick. It's a hard pill to swallow, but that is life for us now. Practice confidence, and you'll feel confident (geez, I am telling myself that now too).

With you being there, and your friends too, I bet he stops coming. You win.

I also have sympathy for the $$ situation. Mine--no $ for kids' school tuition, but he took AP to Vail over Christmas. So I pay it all.

They are insects.


mamazen


me 55
WH 56
married 19 years
separated since 8/2013
D in progress
D-day Dec 21 2013 (after separation)
2 sons 15 and 11
OW = family friend and WH work colleague, going on many years (I was clueless)


Posts: 60 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: canada
StillLivin
♀ Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 3:45 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I'm sorry girl. Damn.
(((newlysingle)))


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2213 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
littlefoggy
♀ Member
Member # 41429
Default  Posted: 3:53 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Take the job.

Who joins a gym and then ACTUALLY goes...


Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13
Divorcing

Posts: 491 | Registered: Nov 2013
k94ever
♀ Member
Member # 11176
Default  Posted: 4:43 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Take the job and rub their noses in it.

You belong there and they do not.


k9


BS: 56
WS: 53
Betrayed: 23 years
Affairs: 14 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

Posts: 6510 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: Wisconsin
kg201
♂ Member
Member # 40173
Default  Posted: 5:06 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Take the job. You can hand them dirty towels when they walk in. Your friends can sweat all over the equipment right before gnat and kitty use them. You could replace the mirrors they typically use to look at themselves with those funhouse mirrors that make them look wider than they really are. Your friends can stand behind them as they workout and gossip loudly about how they heard about this awful couple that works out at the gym, and how they have given each other STDs and don't even know it. You can mess up their automatic payments on the computer so they are charged twice and have to resolve it with their banks. You can give them the really bad Id photos instead of the nice ones (if they exist). I could keep going.


Me: BH, 39
Her: WW, 40
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, ongoing
Dday: 7/28/13
Divorcing, 3 children
---------------------------------
"There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity." -S

Posts: 660 | Registered: Aug 2013
StillLivin
♀ Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 5:12 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Gonna try and word this concisely. Hahaha StillLivin made a funny!
They are insecure about you. Hello Kitty is insecure and threatened which means Fantasy met Reality and is getting it's ass kicked.
Remember Shrek posting a newborn to make me think she had my H's baby! About the same time he started texting and calling and hoovering. She has access to his phone bill. I'm sure she saw that shit!
Never mind we don't want them back, those whores never got over being second best. It's her way of fronting. Whoop her ass psychologically by showing her you don't give a damn!
Just chill, wait. Be still.
You'll see!


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2213 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 6:01 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Take the job. I found out something similar about volunteering, and there's no way that those two boobs are going to chase me away from doing something I enjoy.

If they come in when you're there, give them your best impersonal customer service smile and treat them as though you don't know them. That'll throw them off.

And I'm sending death laser beams at them as well. The nerve.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3572 | Registered: Oct 2011
Leia
♀ Member
Member # 42510
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What all the others said including death rays. Take the job. Get out and see your friends. Don't let the insects rule.


"Somebody get this walking carpet out of my way." Princess Leia, Star Wars

Posts: 296 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Kansas
BAB61
♀ Member
Member # 41181
Default  Posted: 9:20 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I feel the same, only it's at church.

Take the job and act like you don't know them .. you are better than that!!


Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

Posts: 1271 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: DE
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 9:31 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks everyone. I'm feeling better tonight. I made it clear in my email to him that I would be taking the job and that they would just have to deal with me. However, I spoke with my mom tonight and she made a good point. I've traditionally gone home to visit my family every summer and if I take the job now, I won't be able to do that. So she suggested talking to the manager about delaying it until Fall. I'm thinking that is what I will do.

I think that will give them time to forgo the gym anyway. The Gnat is a lazy piece of crap and will go a grand total of three times max. I don't know about her, but I've never heard my DD mention them doing any kind of fitness activities. So, I'm guessing she won't last either. I still plan to go with my friends and they will have my back if we run into them. I'm thinking by fall, they will be over it and probably won't go any longer anyway.

Thank you all for your support though. You have no idea how much it means on such a shitty day.


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 878 | Registered: Mar 2013
Holly-Isis
♀ Member
Member # 13447
Default  Posted: 10:19 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hmm, think one of your future coworkers can secretly change her ID picture to Hello Kitty?

[This message edited by Holly-Isis at 10:19 PM, February 24th (Monday)]


"Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. *CS Lewis*

Posts: 11117 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: Just a fool in limbo
Jeaniegirl
♀ Member
Member # 6370
Default  Posted: 10:26 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Take that job!!!


"Because I deserve better"

Posts: 974 | Registered: Feb 2005
newlysingle
♀ Member
Member # 38735
Default  Posted: 10:26 PM, February 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, I think that might have to happen!


BW - Me (37)
XWH - (37) The Gnat
OW - Some dumb whore he picked up in another state and moved here here. Known as Hello Kitty.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (5), 1 DS (1 year)
Dday 3/13
Divorced 9/20/13

Posts: 878 | Registered: Mar 2013
Topic Posts: 20

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