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User Topic: dumbest person ever
Sleepy312
♀ Member
Member # 38360
Default  Posted: 8:03 AM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

but I'm not sure if it's H or me. The latest wallowing when he came home from work last night is to pursue a new job clear across the country in San Fransisco because it's warm, and I want to live somewhere warm.

First, San Fran isn't *that* warm. Second, I've never once wanted to live in San Fran, Third, I told him geography isn't going to fix anything and trading my misery for his(because he wants to be here with his family which is partially toxic) isn't going to work either. He also made mention that this business destroys marriages. Well, yes, it does if you allow it. Happens in every business. I was just left blankly staring and speechless.

He called a therapist yesterday, so I guess that's a step in the right direction for him working on himself, but I'm not guaranteeting anything to him. I'm stuck here until the kids are out of school in June. I have no intentions of staying here in this town and he figured that out. So, I guess that's why he's looking for options away from here. He keeps saying that he won't be happy without his family, but he was quick to trade our little family's happiness for his with his family(parents/sister) all while talking about how awful my brother is.

BTW, to add to my anger this stupid cat H insisted on getting just knocked a pyrex casserole dish full of brownines onto the tile kitchen floor shattering it everywhere. Anyone want a full breed asshole maine coon who turns 1 tomorrow?


Me 41
Dh 40
Married 11...he forgot our anniversary among other things. Every birthday, holdiay, whatever is forever ruined.

Together 17 years
Two great kids.

He doesn't get it. Moving us to his hometown with his toxic mother is going to


Posts: 507 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Nj
Ivyivy
♀ Member
Member # 42110
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hear you. I have had similar a similar experience in that WH comes up with ridiculous ideas for the future and does not understand why I cannot support them. Although you may want to move farther from his family, you should have an equal say as to the decision of where. Maybe you could pick several locations and let him pick one of those. Stay strong and focus on what you need (and the kids) and what will make you happy.


Me -BW
Him - WH
LTA
DS - 11 and DD - 15

Posts: 176 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast
Sleepy312
♀ Member
Member # 38360
Default  Posted: 9:01 AM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Insult to injury. He's blaming me. I just saw his email to his headhunter, and it says he's just putting it out there that a move out there may be a possibility because "his wife doesn't like the area and doesn't get along with his mother" how about owning your own fuck ups asshole?

so frustrated.


Me 41
Dh 40
Married 11...he forgot our anniversary among other things. Every birthday, holdiay, whatever is forever ruined.

Together 17 years
Two great kids.

He doesn't get it. Moving us to his hometown with his toxic mother is going to


Posts: 507 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Nj
StrongerOne
♀ Member
Member # 36915
Default  Posted: 9:52 AM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow, now that's really professional!

That ought to get him a job, all right.

What a jagoff. So sorry you are saddled with him...


DDay Feb 2011.
In R.

Posts: 840 | Registered: Sep 2012
Sleepy312
♀ Member
Member # 38360
Default  Posted: 10:59 AM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

At this point I'm so mad at myself but by the time gets home I have nothing to say to him and he comes up with the stupidest ideas. I guess he thinks I'm on board with his insanity but I'm not. He told the headhunter I always wanted to live in San Fran. I've never been to sf. I wanted to move to la and spent a lot of my 20s in la but now I'm 41 and his affair lives in la. No thanks.

Also I haven't figured out how to address him searching for her on fb while I was out if town. Again who is the bigger idiot? Him or me?


Me 41
Dh 40
Married 11...he forgot our anniversary among other things. Every birthday, holdiay, whatever is forever ruined.

Together 17 years
Two great kids.

He doesn't get it. Moving us to his hometown with his toxic mother is going to


Posts: 507 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Nj
BtraydWife
♀ Member
Member # 42581
Default  Posted: 12:30 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Him! He's fucking up his chances with you.
You are the loving and trusting spouse that he doesn't deserve right now.


Me-BW
Him-WH
DD-March 2010
TT for 6 months

Delay is the deadliest form of denial. - C. Northcote Parkinson


Posts: 677 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: United States
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 12:35 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

his wife doesn't like the area and doesn't get along with his mother

There's no way I would hire someone who put something like that in professional correspondence. All your other issues with WH aside, I don't foresee a move to SF in your future.

Anyone want a full breed asshole maine coon who turns 1 tomorrow?

I'm sorry, that was just a hilarious hairpin turn. Gotta find some excuse to laugh, don't we?

(((Sleepy)))


We are what we repeatedly do, excellence, then is not an act but a habit. - Aristotle

Posts: 16283 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Sleepy312
♀ Member
Member # 38360
Default  Posted: 2:35 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ungortunately, the cat is a total asshole. My h loves the cat but he seriously dumps like a 300 lb man. Turns one tomorrow and weighs 20 pounds.

I'm not even shocked by the stupid emsil to his headhunter. He may be brilliant at his job but he's an idiot in his personal life.


Me 41
Dh 40
Married 11...he forgot our anniversary among other things. Every birthday, holdiay, whatever is forever ruined.

Together 17 years
Two great kids.

He doesn't get it. Moving us to his hometown with his toxic mother is going to


Posts: 507 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Nj
brokendancer7
♀ Member
Member # 39911
Default  Posted: 4:21 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm with you on the cat thing. My H has 3, though they are just domestic shorthairs. He had to have them! But I was the one who took care of them all the time he was out being Mr. Big Shot, and screwing OW. They drive me crazy!


Me: BS - 58
Him: WS - 56
Married 34 yrs

Latest DD - April 2013, PA


Posts: 179 | Registered: Jul 2013
Sleepy312
♀ Member
Member # 38360
Default  Posted: 4:30 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

omg three?!?! that would put me over the edge. we have a 4yo short hair rescue who is so sweet and not a pain at all and this giant asshole attacks her like a thug in a dark alley. Come to think of it the asshole H insisted on an asshole cat. How fitting.


Me 41
Dh 40
Married 11...he forgot our anniversary among other things. Every birthday, holdiay, whatever is forever ruined.

Together 17 years
Two great kids.

He doesn't get it. Moving us to his hometown with his toxic mother is going to


Posts: 507 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Nj
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 4:39 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

this giant asshole attacks her like a thug in a dark alley.
Come to think of it the asshole H insisted on an asshole cat.


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7680 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
BtraydWife
♀ Member
Member # 42581
Default  Posted: 4:45 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

omg three?!?! that would put me over the edge.

I have 7 but I love them.


Me-BW
Him-WH
DD-March 2010
TT for 6 months

Delay is the deadliest form of denial. - C. Northcote Parkinson


Posts: 677 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: United States
Sleepy312
♀ Member
Member # 38360
Default  Posted: 5:38 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

omg I'm dying here at the thought of 7 cats pooping sorry

Asshole now has to change assholes litter box. I went into the boiler room where the litter box is earlier and the asshole pooped on the floor because he's particular about his litter. HATE HIM, and I need to go buy a new pyrex dish so we can remake the brownies my daughter made!


Me 41
Dh 40
Married 11...he forgot our anniversary among other things. Every birthday, holdiay, whatever is forever ruined.

Together 17 years
Two great kids.

He doesn't get it. Moving us to his hometown with his toxic mother is going to


Posts: 507 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Nj
MissMouseMo
♀ Member
Member # 38562
Default  Posted: 8:52 PM, March 6th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

May I recommend a metal baking pan?

Cat-free by choice,
MissMouse

[This message edited by MissMouseMo at 8:53 PM, March 6th (Thursday)]


It is the gut-wrenching, down-to-your-soul honesty that helps so much. ~paraphrased from CancunCrushed
"I edit, therefore I am." -BionicGal

Posts: 226 | Registered: Feb 2013
Sleepy312
♀ Member
Member # 38360
Default  Posted: 7:21 AM, March 7th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh he ruins all metals pans. He being the adult husband. He can't seen to learn that you don't saw food on non stick baking pans. When he heard it once the plea not to cut on the pan or scratch the surface of a new pan he then just throws stuff straight into the oven rack so then I end up having to clean the oven. It's a no win situation over a baking fish!


Me 41
Dh 40
Married 11...he forgot our anniversary among other things. Every birthday, holdiay, whatever is forever ruined.

Together 17 years
Two great kids.

He doesn't get it. Moving us to his hometown with his toxic mother is going to


Posts: 507 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Nj
Topic Posts: 15

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