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User Topic: Lack of physical contact
JaneDeaux
♀ Member
Member # 42630
Default  Posted: 7:29 AM, March 15th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WH and I are attempting to reconcile after his latest EA/PA. He has come a long way in terms of transparency and we are in MC. So why won't he have anything physical to do with me? I'm not talking about hysterical bonding. I mean a hug, a goodnight kiss., an arm around the waist. Hell I'd settle for a handshake! Is this normal?


We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. Kenji Miyazawa

Posts: 58 | Registered: Mar 2014
devasted30
♀ Member
Member # 39439
Default  Posted: 12:13 PM, March 15th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nothing about what is happening in our lives right now is "normal". Everyone handles infidelity differently. Perhaps your husband is feeling so much guilt, it's his way of punishing himself. Be open, ask him. You'll never know the answer unless you ask. Don't assume, ask. Being open and honest is the only way to handle these questions. Stay calm and talk. I know, easier said then done, but give it a try. It could be something completely off the map, something that you haven't thought of or it could be something as simple as guilt.

Posts: 1225 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Ontario, Canada
crazynot
♀ Member
Member # 24572
Default  Posted: 12:32 PM, March 15th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry, but in my opinion it's not a good sign. I had 6 months of coldness after he (temporarily) gave in and dumped OW...


Me - 50
Him - 51
DDay 21 March 2009
Divorcing and delighted!

Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it.


Posts: 863 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: UK
FixYou71
♀ Member
Member # 42654
Default  Posted: 3:49 PM, March 15th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You really need to ask him then you can decide if you can believe what he's saying to you or if he's giving you the best possible answer to cover up for the truth. It sounds concerning.


BS: 43
H: 49
Dday #1 Oct 2007 (Porn for 2 yrs)
Dday #2 May 2013 (Porn for 5 more yrs))
Dday#3 May 2014 (finally admitted to drunk kissing OW in 1994: the 2nd drunken kiss with another woman during our M)
DD 21 and DS 17
Married 1993

Posts: 451 | Registered: Mar 2014
IsthereEVERanend
♂ Member
Member # 42216
Default  Posted: 8:57 PM, March 15th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think it is entirely possible that he is simply afraid of you. That because of his guilt you might reject him or not want his touch. My fww told me that she did not want to push me too hard too fast. Actually, I craved her touch. What makes things doubly difficult is the fact she never has been a touchy feely person. So yeah, I understand something of where you are coming from.


Me: Older than dirt
FWW 63
DD 8/1990 She confessed to a 2 month ea/pa
Asked forgiveness but volunteered to leave. No way was I going to give her the boot

The eight most feared words used together in the English language: We need to talk. Th


Posts: 88 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Utah
Topic Posts: 5

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