Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: EverythingAfter (44970)

Off Topic Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Aging...40 years and up. (vent)
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 5:43 PM, March 17th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm only a few months younger than SadinAZ but I can pass for 40s

But she can pass for late 30s...


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20178 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
wanttounderstand
♀ New Member
Member # 33819
Default  Posted: 6:35 PM, March 17th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

During one of my post 40s "OMG When did I start looking like my mother" meltdowns, I was fortunate to run into the following quote:

"40 is the old age of youth and 50 is the youth of old age." (Victor Hugo)

This hit me like a ton of bricks and completely changed my perception of aging. I realized that at 50 something (I'm now 60) that this was probably the healthiest and most active I would ever be.

I asked myself if when I was in my 80s or 90s, with the natural decline of my health, did I want to remember that I wasted my "youth" fretting about being old instead of enjoying my health and mobility to the fullest? The answer was no.

I still, on occasion, bitch and moan about aches and pains, bat wings and my turkey neck, but I don't spend more than a minute or two. I instead try to focus my time and energy making memories that I can enjoy when I am too old to get around and all I have are my memories.


Posts: 47 | Registered: Nov 2011
TrulyReconciled
♂ Member
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 9:34 AM, March 18th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

But she can pass for late 30s...

Metric???


"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 21124 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 9:46 AM, March 18th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Dog years

[This message edited by Sad in AZ at 9:46 AM, March 18th (Tuesday)]


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20178 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
circe
♀ Member
Member # 6687
Default  Posted: 12:43 PM, March 18th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I asked myself if when I was in my 80s or 90s, with the natural decline of my health, did I want to remember that I wasted my "youth" fretting about being old instead of enjoying my health and mobility to the fullest? The answer was no.

Exactly! I look back on pictures and videos of me taken in my 20's when my son was a baby, and I was so beautiful and glowing and healthy and young, and I clearly recall being constantly obsessed with losing baby weight and whether some "goal jeans" were ever going to fit, self-conscious about my body and scurrying into towels and cover ups at the beach so perfect strangers who weren't even looking at me wouldn't see me from a bad angle!

If only I could have looked at myself with happiness and gratitude back then! I had so much to be happy and grateful for. It's a great lesson. Hard as it is to believe, I'll probably look back at my early 40's with the same wondering eye when I'm 60 and wonder why I didn't see how healthy and young I look. So I may as well tell my 60 year old self that yes, I do enjoy being this young and hot.


Posts: 3192 | Registered: Mar 2005
wildbananas
♀ Member
Member # 10552
Default  Posted: 10:27 PM, March 18th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm 46. My eyesight is definitely going to hell (I've been in bifocals for a few years) and I'm getting more grey but I cover it. I'm not ready for that yet.

Other than that, I'm active (at the gym a few times a week), drink a lot of water, try to get the sleep I need and am told I don't look my age. I'm also happier and more at peace with myself than ever. My 40s are by far my favorite decade to date. I know who I am and I don't trip over things like I used to.

Unless, of course, I'm not wearing my bifocals.


Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

Posts: 15396 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Now an AZ girl
StillLivin
♀ Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 12:35 AM, March 19th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Squats, pfffft. Lunge walk. Makes a quarter bounce off the buttocks everytime! Work up to 4 sets of 24 steps. Keep knees properly aligned.
Sunscreen sunscreen sunscreen.
And eat lots of salmon and colorful vegies. I'm 44. Been told I don't look a day over 34. I'll take the compliments where I can. Oh, and after I get my degree and re-enter the workforce, first thing I'm saving up for is a little nip tuck. I will need it by then if I want to keep looking mid 30s! As for the eyes, meh, vision is over rated!


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2238 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
GabyBaby
♀ Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 12:37 AM, March 19th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm not really freaked out about my looks as I get older.
The thing that bothers me is all the random aches, body parts starting to not function properly, and my failing eyesight!

At this point, even if I'm gray and wrinkled, my eyes are getting so bad I won't be able to tell anyway!


Me - 40s
SorryInSac - WH#2 - 40s. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - ??

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW)
Legally married 18yrs, together 16.5yrs

I edit often for clarity.


Posts: 6443 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
Duskpearl
♀ Member
Member # 41870
Default  Posted: 5:28 AM, March 23rd (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm 43 & have been told I look much younger. I have looked the same for the past 20 yrs! 1 or 2 grey hairs which I pull out when I see them.

I have pain in my shoulders due to 2 frozen shoulders so I'm sure this plus the breakdown of my marriage will age me very soon.

I wear sunscreen year round. Have walked daily for the last 25 years. Eat relatively healthy, chocolate is my only vice.

I am at my slimmest point ever (not that I have ever been overweight) & the BS diet has assisted in more weight loss! I am literally half the size of the OW who is only 30! She has a lovely wobbly stomach with matching toilet roll legs (& arms)....

Ironically, my WH also used to say that I had the best a$$ in town (I know it was him just saying so cause he loved me) but now he is with the OW who's a$$ is at least 3 times my size.

Oh & my WH is 6 months younger than me & he has always looked older than his age. We used to joke that we were father & daughter as everyone used to say how much older he looked. But now that he is bald the grey hair is gone & his current work colleagues think he looks so young, hence the OW.


Sometimes your heart needs more time to accept what your mind already knows

Posts: 65 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Australia
SI Staff
Moderator
Member # 10
Red  Posted: 6:40 AM, March 23rd (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Duskpearl,

Please remember to keep OT infidelity-free.

Thank you!


Posts: 10000 | Registered: May 2002
jo2love
♀ Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 12:45 PM, March 23rd (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd like to go back in time to kick my 18yr old self's ass. Wolfing down a huge bag of doritos and a whole bag of skittles, yet not gaining an ounce? Bitch. Somehow that doesn't fly after 35.

According to Sad's link, I am going to end up a cat lady.

ETA - I already have 2 cats.

[This message edited by SI Staff at 3:01 PM, March 23rd (Sunday)]


Posts: 35238 | Registered: Mar 2011
sisoon
♂ Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 2:45 PM, March 23rd (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know whether to ROFLMAO, LOL or just snicker at this thread. Just sayin'....

At just about 40, my W went on a bike ride with our son through the NU campus. Son reported some guys whistled at mom/W. Or should that be on a different thread?


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 10100 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
InnerLight
♀ Member
Member # 19946
Default  Posted: 9:32 PM, March 23rd (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It is wild to see your face and body change so much! I'm 53 and glad I invested so much of my earlier years in developing self understanding, self mastery beyond career skills.

I heard that when you hit middle age you either start to give up and die, return to adolescence, or go for wisdom.

I'm attempting to go for wisdom as it is so satisfying and deep that it makes up for the wrinkles, grey hairs, and the ease at which it is possible to gain flab. I would never want to return to the limited experience or knowledge I had when I was in my 20's.


BS, age 53, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years and 20 together. Now I am living alone in the beautiful rural property that was once the dream retreat with X. It's taking a long time to create new dreams but despite some struggles I am mostly happy.

Posts: 5826 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
Caretaker1
♂ Member
Member # 42777
Default  Posted: 9:47 PM, March 23rd (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I eat right, and exercise daily for 20 minutes, wash my face, take care of my teeth and gums, take a multivitamin, go outside. I need to sleep more and drink more water.

Posts: 234 | Registered: Mar 2014
GabyBaby
♀ Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 10:44 AM, March 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I heard that when you hit middle age you either start to give up and die, return to adolescence, or go for wisdom.
I love this!
I think hubby and I are a combo of adolescence and (attempts at) wisdom.
My kids are young adults, which means hubby and I can go off and do our thing more than a lot of my peers. We laugh a LOT together which helps keep us "young". But neither of us are into fashion or keeping up with the Joneses. We do what we enjoy and leave the rest.
So far it works well for us.


Me - 40s
SorryInSac - WH#2 - 40s. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - ??

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW)
Legally married 18yrs, together 16.5yrs

I edit often for clarity.


Posts: 6443 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
BAB61
♀ Member
Member # 41181
Default  Posted: 11:49 AM, March 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm laying here with my surgical site throbbing - planning on all the things I can do once I'm totally healed! This is my second hip replacement, had the first Oct '12. I'm not that old, but arthritis is no respecter of age or anything else! Even with all the stuff I am dealing with I tell people I'm 19 with 34 years experience!

Getting older isn't a problem for me, all the aches and pains are! I count my blessings though, still don't need bifocals, have ALL my own teeth, still hear, still able to smell and taste, my mind is strong, and other than joints so is my body!

Pilates, yoga and swimming are going to take me to ancient! LoL


Boss A** B*tch
BS/52 Me, STBXpos/56, dd's 16&14
1st D-day 10/19/2013 EA/PA
2nd D-day 12/7/2013 LTA/Rendezvous
S 12/7/2013 No-fault state, 6 mo S, counting down the days.

Posts: 1271 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: DE
Topic Posts: 56
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

Return to Forum: Off Topic Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.