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Newest Member: JRconfused (45363)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Threatening Custody. help.
♀ Member
Member # 36883
Default  Posted: 2:14 PM, March 24th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A couple of people have said a judge won't grant week on & off with a school aged child.
That's not true.
That's what I have.

We have 50/50 with Stepson - but we only got that because we were willing to drive him to the school bus every school day and pick him up afterwards.

Your Xh is an hour away - that just will not work on a day to day basis to get your son to school and back.

Now, if he moves closer / within the school district, then that would put him in a better position to get the 50/50.

Me: 31 MH
Him: 37 MH
New online find 6/19/14 - shit

Posts: 1767 | Registered: Sep 2012
♀ Member
Member # 23437
Default  Posted: 11:08 PM, March 30th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He's saying this to scare you into helping him with the house.

Yes. He's obviously short of cash. And in CS arrears, too. Fathers sometimes threaten a fight over custody in order to scare mothers into accepting less child support than would be their due, or even into abandoning the attempt to get it.

[This message edited by Cally60 at 11:08 PM, March 30th (Sunday)]

Posts: 2116 | Registered: Mar 2009
♀ Member
Member # 38880
Default  Posted: 1:07 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yesterday & today have been emotionally exhausting. He's given up trying to get me to co-sign mortgage help for the house. His new thing is having his lawyer send me an "offer" of $200/month c/s and no spousal. Mind you he's ordered to pay $300 spousal and $577 c/s. He's horribly behind on payments. Unfortunately since he never signed the divorce papers he's now obviously refusing to sign until he gets his way. It looks like we're headed to court because $200 TOTAL a month is like a slap in the face. He is actually saying that I'M not playing fair by not accepting his $200 and that if we have to go to court then let's go. I am ignoring his texts and just going through my lawyer. But my anxiety is through the roof!

Me - 37
lying cheating a-hole - 36
kids - 17,12,10
D-day 3/25/2013
Filed for divorce 3/26/2013

Posts: 66 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Chatsworth, Ca
♀ Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mind you he's ordered to pay $300 spousal and $577 c/s.

If he's already been ordered to pay those amounts, if he isn't doing so, he is in contempt.
He can try to change the final decree since it isn't signed yet, but until there's a new order in place, he owes you that money.

Me - 42
SorryInSac (WH#2) - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - Stick a fork in me...

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW) - Legally married 18yrs

I edit often for clarity.

Posts: 6540 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He's playing chicken with you, honey. He is trying to scare you into accepting what he wants. Don't waver - if you have to go to trial, do it. It's worth the fight.

Sending you strength and comfort, hon. ((((MR))))

You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana

Posts: 25767 | Registered: Aug 2011
♀ Member
Member # 40095
Default  Posted: 2:34 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Typically, once a custody schedule is set, a judge will only change if the parent wanting the change can show that it's in the best interest of the child. so work on it from that standpoint and determine why it would NOT be best for your child, i.e disruptive to your schooling, disruptive of his friends/sports schedule, etc. Don't be afraid to get a psychologist involved on your side to give an evaluation or testify on your behalf.

BS: Me
WH: Husband
One daughter - 22 months
Married 11.5 years
2.5 false R's.
Status: Divorcing.
You can't pick up a turd by the clean end. Time to flush the toilet.

Posts: 251 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Somewhere on the Eastern Seaboard
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 2:52 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


If he said the sky is orange-would you believe him?

The sky isn't orange it's blue. Just because he says something -doesn't mean it's true. Let him threaten all he wants via text or email just do not talk to him. When he starts on CS or visitation or anything else that should be handled by your attorney.... Tell him " I've got to go" and hang up! If he's calling you names or yelling-hang up!

If you need permission I'll give it! You deserve to be treated better.


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5279 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Topic Posts: 47
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