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Newest Member: Gladiator5 (45339)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Doubting yourself
mof2
♀ Member
Member # 40287
Default  Posted: 8:26 AM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It has been a long road trying to figure out ME. In the last 2 years.....got laid off from a job that I was great at due to discontinuation of operations, got pregnant and suffered a miscarriage and XWH left for another woman.

Almost two years later, I am throwing myself into a career change. My degree is in Accounting which I have done since I got my degree. After everything that has happened, I went through a change and a friend who is big in real estate where I live said I needed to be in real estate. Her words "it is you! You are such a people person." I have now completed the courses and just waiting for my test date.

With all that being said, my fear.....failure. I feel like I have failed so much the last couple of years that I don't see a good future. Has anyone gone through this? How do you get through it and believe in yourself again?


BW - Me 43
WH - Cheating Swine 43
Dday - February 12, 2013....a week before I was to give birth to the child I miscarried and 12 days before our 5th anniversary.

Posts: 316 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: DFW
Leia
♀ Member
Member # 42510
Default  Posted: 10:19 AM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

mof2,
I took some on line tests for a job that I didn't get. Part of it was math, and well, I haven't been in a math class for over 20 years. So it was hard. But, I just told myself that the experience was worth it to have, and that I'm one step closer to moving on to something else. I would give the same advice to you. It is scary, but it is one step closer to where you need to be. Best of luck on your test. Hugs!


"Somebody get this walking carpet out of my way." Princess Leia, Star Wars

Posts: 296 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Kansas
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 11:39 AM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think the best thing to do is face the fears. You will likely find out that you are able to far exceed your expectations. And perhaps do some IC to discuss how to find a more positive approach/outlook? I think getting over fear of being hurt/failing is very hard after going through a trauma like betrayal, especially compounded by a career change and the loss of a pregnancy. It's human to struggle with not expecting the best but rather worrying about the worst.

I'm sure you'll be a great realtor!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 12:25 PM, April 1st (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I feel like I have failed so much the last couple of years

Horseshit! I don't see any personal failure in your story.

- You were laid off because of a management decision, NOT fired for incompetence.

- You had a miscarriage. Sadly, that's just a thing that happens from time to time. You didn't cause it.

- You were left by a lying, cheating arsehole. HE failed to keep his marriage together. You are free from said lying, cheating arsehole.

You didn't cause any of those things to happen. They're hard fucking knocks - no doubt about that - but they do NOT represent any failure on your part.

You are going to rock the real estate world.


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 2089 | Registered: Jan 2013
Topic Posts: 4

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