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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Post an example of your ex "Living the Life"
dmari
♀ Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 3:48 PM, April 5th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't have any stories but I'm enjoying reading yours. How do you guys even find out this information?? I don't really give a shit about his life as long as when our divorce court date comes around, I want him ordered to pay back what he owes me. Bottom line, I'm loving my life.


Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2271 | Registered: Oct 2012
Helen of Troy
♀ Member
Member # 26419
Default  Posted: 8:11 PM, April 5th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Reports from kids, I try to act nonchalant about it; he and owife do not have a home. They work a few weeks at a time at a jobsite mostly up and down the east coast. They get mail at their parents' homes. Fucktard signed all house contents to me and written in MSA. He is now saying it is all his stuff because his family did this or that. He forgets that at the beginning of this beautiful unicorn land in schmoopie-ville, ow was pressuring him to get divorced final and marry her right away. Thinking with his penis as usual and not for long term.
He has gained 50 pounds. Now when in college and beyond he was slim and could eat anything not gain weight. He was mean about it too, frat bros would have "contests" to see who could pick up the fattest chick of the night. (red flag I ignored when he told this story with bravado)So karma bus arrived now because he is obese level.
He is not allowed to choose his own clothing or deodorant or cologne. She does it. She checks his phone and email but he isn't allowed same access to hers. She makes him wear a COWBOY HAT. Nothing against cowboy hats but if you knew someone 20+ years and it was not their style it just looks so fake and ridiculous.
Overextended financially and deeply in debt.
In order to try to combat her trailer fabulousness, owife collects Coach purses when not in midst of shopping addiction satisfied at walmart. When he thought his CS would go down when oldest dd aged out, it more than doubled. Owife is so stupid, uneducated and ignorant and because neither one has any boundaries, a once fairly bright wxh now seems as dumb as a box of rocks. They eat McDonalds, and smoke pot and never get off the couch much less exercise unless it is to go get another bag of chips. He has to take blood pressure meds now.
All this stuff I "made" him do during the marriage and how "controlling" I was in his mind, picking out his clothes and etc where things I didn't do.
Owife now has his testicles in a jar on the nightstand. He tries to take his cell phone in the bathroom and she scolds him.
This man was horrible to me at times and an abusive person, is now in virtual jail folks.
Oh one more owife screaming at him saying he never listens. Laughing so hard tears coming down because he is a rotten listener. All this and more I wonder how she likes her "prize" now?

Posts: 4715 | Registered: Dec 2009
miadianna
♀ Member
Member # 10516
Default  Posted: 8:34 PM, April 5th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well my XH is living the life he always wanted. And we all have suffered the consequences. Married 25 years. He moved to another state, all by himself, left me with the house, kids, dog, cars, responsibilities of getting two children through college by myself. Never visited them at school, never visited them at home. Never helped with anything. He's living as if his family never existed. I haven't seen him in nine years. My kids have no relationship with him.

He bought a huge $500,000 house on five acres of land for OW and himself. Her kids lived with them for a few years but now one moved in with her boyfriend and I don't know where the other one is living. He bought a boat, has a new SUV, other vehicles. Tanning bed! He makes between $150,000-200,000 plus her salary all to himself. Will be retiring soon with a lot of money stashed in his retirement fund. Getting married to OW next month. He begged my kids to attend by text message, they refused. He is very upset by this, very angry.

It's not the life I wanted because my life was my family and always will be but that's what he wanted and he got it. He drinks a lot and go to bars with OW and spends tons of money at restaurants, shopping, etc. I think he wanted someone who was a party girl and not family oriented. That's what he has now. I believe he is happy. But he has no family anymore. And who knows what the future brings but for now, he is "living the life" but that's not my kind of "living" or "life."


Me: BS 53
Son: 27 years old
Daughter: 25 years old
D-day(s) 9/23/94 - 1/31/05
Divorced 4/10/08

Posts: 7482 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Illinois
Take2
♀ Member
Member # 23890
Default  Posted: 10:49 PM, April 5th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

First understand that I "never wanted to try anything new or go anywhere,I wasn't adventurous....Just so you get the picture....

His dream was to sell everything and live on the boat, sail around the world, play music and harbor hop... I wasn't enthused. We weren't experienced sailors by any stretch of the imagination, there were no facilities on the boat, no toilet, shower, no fridge...and no plans to change any of that. 'Cause you know roughing it was part of the fun... Me? I like camping and all, but not when your limited to 30 feet and have to give up your home and family. I kind of like seeing my kids, and grand kid once in awhile, besides, I can think of better ways to go than being lost at sea because fucklenuts thought he was a sailor after a couple seasons tooling around the harbor.

So anyway, Dday, D and He is living the dream! From what I gather, he lived on the boat thru the winter here in the northeast, peeing over the side and shitting in a kitty litter box.

Meanwhile after a year of scrimping and saving, I just crossed the Iceland off the bucket list! Woot!

[This message edited by Take2 at 10:50 PM, April 5th (Saturday)]


"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?

Posts: 4135 | Registered: May 2009 | From: New England
Weatherly
♀ Member
Member # 18222
Default  Posted: 12:49 PM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My ex has been gone since '08. He's had a dozen or more different jobs, a "new" vehicle, every 3 months. (and by new I mean he picked it up for $300 and drove it for a few months until the transmission goes out.) He lives with his parents currently, but, for the last 6 years, he dates FOW for 3-6 months, lives with her until he finds somebody new. He moves into the house of new GF. Then, because he cheated to get that one, they don't trust each other, so they break up and he moves back in with them last woman he cheated on me with. Wash, rinse, repeat. He's been sued for rent, car payments, etc. For awhile he lived in a house without electricity.

My favorite though was RIGHT after he left, he went out and bought himself a Dodge Durango. Because I "wouldn't let him have his dream car." no, i wouldn't, because those years had bad transmissions. He bragged about that are like crazy. It was hit, with no note left, 3 or 4 times. They found sugar in the gas tank. All the electronics on it went out randomly. He hit three deer. AND, had to replace the transmission. All this within 8 months or so. They repossessed it.

So, now he's looking for his "true love" the one who will make life perfect, all the time. Because, if he could just find her his life would be perfect. I was the source of ALL his problems. But...6 yrs later, my life is good. I haven't seemed to have ruined my new husband's life either!


Me-29,Two boys, 10 and 9

It will all be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end

Happily remarried to a wonderful man (Aussie). I think I found the right guy and the right finger this time.


Posts: 4491 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Indiana
suckstobeme
♀ Member
Member # 30853
Default  Posted: 7:39 PM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh boy, where to start...

Dumbass works with OW slunt and she actually is still his secretary even though the entire office hates her. She knows his entire schedule - every meeting, every appearance, every everything. He has zero freedom at work and that is precisely why she's still there.

They live together in a teeny little house along with her two kids and mine when they go there EOW.

Douche bought the house and had to ask his father - from whom he is usually estranged - for a loan for the down payment.

Even though he bought the house, the slunt feels like its hers. So, she took over the master bedroom and lets him throw all of his shit in the spare room that DS uses when he's there.

The slunt lost her license for a while so he was forced to also cart her stupid ass around.

On certain days, he takes her kids to school before he has to drop mine off to catch their buses. Mind you, he lives about 20 minutes away. This is so that the slunt can have a kid free morning to get ready.

The kids all do chores when they are there. They tell me that dad does chores too. When I asked what the slunt does, they said "she decorates.".

When my kids are there for a dinner and hers are not, the slunt does not eat with them and either goes to lay down or take a bath. Meanwhile, dummy makes them plain noodles.

Eyewitnesses have seen her scream at him in a crowded grocery store. People have also seen him out paying for drinks while her and her slutty friends sit at a bar, ignore him, and throw back shots.

She openly mocks him on her FB page.

She has said on another social media outlet that the ONLY people that matter in the world are her and her kids. No mention of him in that sentence.

Bottom line is that he got busted banging the office pump who was single, looking for a daddy for her kids and a KISA for herself. He was stupid enough to take a big dump right where he eats and got stuck with a bat shit crazy slunt who isn't gonna let him go until she's used him all up and spit him out. My biggest hope is that one of them will start cheating soon. In fact, DD tells me that he comes into her room in the mornings and reads his phone while hes in there. My IC said the same thing I did - "he's hiding something."


BW - me
ExWH - "that one"
D - 2011
You get what you put in, and people get what they deserve.
Hard as it may be, try to never give the OP any of your power or head space.

Posts: 2842 | Registered: Jan 2011
lackofcolor
♀ New Member
Member # 38784
Default  Posted: 9:28 AM, April 7th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

STBXH is actually doing really well for himself, has a nice two bedroom apartment, new job, lots of new friends, going out and having fun all the time. I, on the other hand, took a pay-cut and share a house with my sister and her two children and it's chaotic.

He doesn't have DD though. I win.


ME - BS 34, HIM - WH 31
Daughter age 6
Together since 2001
Married 2005

DD#1 2/23/13, online EA. Claimed NC but A continued until 3/20/13 when OW called it off. DD#2 4/4/13.

DD #3 9/21/13 2nd EA (with employee). He leaves.

Pursuing divorce.


Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2013
gypsybird87
♀ Member
Member # 39193
Default  Posted: 7:00 PM, April 7th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Um, let's see...

He moved from a large house with A/c to a small house with no A/c and complained bitterly all last summer. Yes, I am hoping for a scorcher this year.

Instead of me supporting his kids, and seeing them all the time, HE is now supporting OW's two grown kids who live with them full time and don't work. His own kids rarely see him.

He now has to pretend to love country music, which he hates, because that's what OW likes.

He now has to pretend to love all sports, which he hates, because that's what OW likes.

He complains to DD that OW doesn't contribute anything to the household expenses, she only pays for her personal items like clothes and makeup. He has to pay for everything else.

And oh yeah.... there was that woman who called my number looking for him, in regards to "an urgent court matter". Not sure what that's about, but I was very happy to help in providing her with his cell number, new address, and employer name.

Live it up, XWH. You are starting to get the life you deserve....


Me: Enjoying life
Him: Someone else's problem

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage. ~ Anais Nin


Posts: 919 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Oregon
phmh
♀ Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 7:05 PM, April 7th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have no insight into his life since we don't have kids so no ties, but by his e-mails asking me to send him naked pictures (to which he gets crickets) I'm guessing that life isn't exactly what he expected!


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

Character is destiny


Posts: 3409 | Registered: Dec 2011
Whalers11
♀ Member
Member # 27544
Default  Posted: 10:07 AM, April 9th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Let's see...

My ex is 41 years old and living with mom and dad again. I have no problem with adults living at home - but he has never lived on his own. When he is in between women, he ends up back with his parents.

He has no job and a bad back. Most of the work he has skills for is manual labor jobs and that's kind of hard to do with a bad back.

He has no money, no savings, no retirment accounts... I supported us on my income and he didn't have to work. He did sporadically, but anything he made was "fun" money.

He's had to give up all his hobbies because he can't afford them anymore.

He left because he wanted to be a full-time dad to OC. That lasted about a year before OW kicked him out for good. Now he only gets to see OC one night a week for a few hours and every other weekend.

He is tied to a batshit crazy woman forever because of OC. She is hgh drama, high maintenance, dumb as shit and belittles him and he has to deal with it because he is afraid she will find a way to keep him from OC if he doesn't. He hates her family, as well.

There are a lot of other little things, too. I try to remind myself of it when it gets me down. He was always really good with kids and I always thought he would be a great dad. Sometimes it stings knowing that OW at least got a great dad for her kid, even if he was a shitty boyfriend. I am at the point that I don't even know if I'll ever have a family.

I know my ex loves OC - she is really all he has left that is valuable in his life. I know it kills him that he can not provide for her the way he thinks she deserves to be spoiled. I wanted to R and I would have welcomed OC into my life - I hope he thinks about it every day that together, we could have given OC a lot more than she has now.


Me: BGF - 33
Together 11+ years - not married, no children.
D-Day: 2/9/2010
OC Born: 10/9/2010
Status: He chose OW/OC and left immediately.

Posts: 2260 | Registered: Feb 2010
Topic Posts: 30
Pages: 1 · 2

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