I found e-mails between them.
I just looked at him. (I had no idea at the time all the stuff and craziness that the A had put into our relationship and my life. Boy did I find out soon and still 3 yrs. later am).
Had to make him leave as I found him texting her that night.
On the phone soon after Dd when he was sneakily trying to start a fight with me and make me look like the bad one, I asked him twice if "she" knew we were engaged. And he said yes. So I said "well that says alot about HER resume, doesn't it?" (He dealt alot with resumes as he lost his job 3 times in our 8 years together trying to pay bills and hold it together)
Then 3 weeks later when he came to get his stuff, and he was rude and nasty to me at the cell phone store to get me off his plan, I asked him what work she did.
He said, yes and I emphasize: A THERAPIST.
I just laughed and said "oh, that'll be fun!"
Whatever. Let her have him. A few weeks later he said "It blew up."
Hopefully this doesn't offend or trigger you. Just my experience.
I told my IC it was crazymaking. Hard to put it into words.
Turned out that the guy, while not a patient, was dealing with the loss of his W to cancer. She just was *helping*.
But of course, all the problems that suddenly developed in the last 4 months(before I caught them) of the relationship were all due to my faults.
It's a special kind of crazy making because they have the handbook of how to mess you up in the process of them cheating.
OW was also in many abusive relationships with other men, and from the sounds of it, she never had the strength to deal with those issues/get out of the relationships. so she turned to MY EX for comfort.