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User Topic: Unexpected trigger today - bad day
Sadjacey
♀ Member
Member # 41655
Default  Posted: 2:36 AM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Have been struggling all day. Then we were doing a cryptic crossword together. The answer to on of me clues was shatter. I found it really hard to control my emotions enough to read the next clue out. Shattered is what I feel.

[This message edited by Sadjacey at 2:37 AM, April 6th (Sunday)]


Me: BS 59
WH: 60
Married 39 years
Together more than 40
Porn use known since 2005
DDay: 11.24.12 - found emails to prostitute,
Disclosure: TT for months. Still not sure whether I have it all.
DDay 2: 2.20 2014 phone, txt to same prostitute found

Posts: 121 | Registered: Dec 2013
PRNDL
♂ Member
Member # 41927
Default  Posted: 4:11 AM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well you were up late. Its ok, so am I. Im so sorry about your trigger. Triggers seem to be one of the longest lasting fall out symptoms.

My D-day was over a year ago, we are divorcing, I moved out, and I STILL trigger! Songs, the beach, a certain SUV make and model, a certain hotel/bar, and so on.

For me, I find that if I confront the trigger, I become numb to it. I try to expose myself to them.

It seems like you are in limbo though. I was there for 7 months. I do not recommend it.

In my opinion. Remember, this is my opinion. There is no such thing as R. Only limbo. Forever wondering, triggering, settling for them due to bills/kids, after they did what they did and probably will keep doing it.

Now that me and my STBXW are divorcing, my triggers are just that. Triggers.

While I was in limbo, the triggers were warnings and reminders. They were my mind and body telling me to ignor my fool of a heart and to get away from the source of my pain.

My intuition was correct. After her one year affair. Our R was false, she was still with him.

My point is, are they triggers or intuition?

Hugs. Good luck. We are here for you.


BH: 35 (me)
WS: 30 / OM: 30
Son: 11
Affair: 1.5 year long 2012
ONS with stranger Feb 2013
D-day #1 March 2013
D-day #2 April 2013
D-day #3 Sept 2013
Affair continued.
Limbo 7 months
Moved out - 180D - NC
Divorced
She recently ended it with OM

Posts: 191 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Tampa Florida
littleflower
♀ Member
Member # 42673
Default  Posted: 9:53 PM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sadjacey
Yesterday was a bad day for triggers for me too !
I don't bother trying to keep it together when I trigger any more . I seem to get through them so much faster if I just let go .
Still sucks tho

Hugs


DD 13/1/14
Him WH
OW now X BFF
3 kids under 4

Posts: 98 | Registered: Mar 2014
knolls
♀ Member
Member # 39242
Default  Posted: 10:06 PM, April 6th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My husband and I are doing well and I still triggered so badly yesterday.
I knew this month would be difficult as it was when I became suspicious last year and when I had my first major depression of my life. And when I was seriously considering jumping off the Henry Hudson Bridge.
Yesterday was first Saturday. Which was their intimate days. Not the only day the talked texted and flirted. But the day of the month they slept together. - for a few months. EA was years My husband and I were discussing a resturant that we went to on this day last year (Sunday after first Saturday ) and it hit me hard that we had such an amazing day after he had been with her a few hours earlier. Very hard trigger.
Triggers are not fun.


I am stronger than the storm.
I take every experience in my life, no matter how horrendous it was, as a learning experience

Posts: 64 | Registered: May 2013
Topic Posts: 4

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