I agree that you're unfortunately not in R. If he can't sit with your pain and answer all questions truthfully and without being defensive, then you will certainly be stuck.
I remember that stuck feeling...I felt like a caged animal with no where to go. It was such a terrible place to be. And I only had the financial worries, not the health issues. I also don't think you should make any rash decisions now. Focus on you and your child. Be kind and gentle to yourself. Love and cherish yourself the way you know you deserve.
In the end you do have to decide. No matter what your H does, will you decide to try to grow and heal? I know it sucks. It's unfair because you did NOTHING wrong!! But sometimes you have to decide to do it for yourself.
I'm sorry you find yourself in this difficult place.