After dday I felt it was very important to take some time and focus on myself for a little while. I have spent many years focused on WH's career and the needs of our young children, I needed the space more than ever.
WH and I separated for 3 months after dday, being alone at home with the kids all day was incredibly difficult. At the end of the day though we survived and I managed to get meals on the table and everyone was bathed. I could do this on my own if I needed to, which was an incredibly empowering lesson to learn. I don't think I would be at this place in our R if I hadn't learned to do this on my own.
Before dday I had been toying with the idea of switching careers. WH and I had decided that I was not going to go back to work after our youngest was born but that I would stay home with the kids and focus on retraining to become a yoga teacher. Well, dday happened and I wasn't comfortable with the idea of staying out of the work force. I wanted to be able to provide a living for my kids on my own should it ever come to that point again. At the same time I felt robbed of the opportunity to work in a field that I am passionate about. So I decided to do both.
I am currently enrolled in a two year training program which is aprox 10hours of study/ classes per week. I am also working 4 days a week as a legal assistant. This means that WH is home with the kids in the evenings while I am in class/ studying. This was a big adjustment for him (prior to dday he was out with "friends" 4x a week) but he has been positive and encouraging every step of the way.