Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: fishfood89 (44932)

Off Topic Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: unfriendly co workers
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:29 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Started a new retail job almost two months ago. The job is easy, good hours, but the bosses and all but two of the co-workers are so unfriendly and even rude.

I don't get it. You walk into work you say good morning, right? One guy walks right past me like I'm invisible, barely glances my way. The manager today gave me shit about taking my 15 min break. The other day I didn't even get a break and after that I decided I was going to ask for it. Today when I did she was a total bitch.

Condescending and rude, it's so unnecessary. It's a crappy, barely above minimum wage retail job. I do it for the extra money and to get away from the stress of my other 35 hour/week job.

I always try to be friendly and pleasant. I don't understand the attitudes, I really don't.

I think from now on I'm going to go in, say nothing, do my job and go home. But I will ask for my 15 minute break every time. Fuck that.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
Rainbows
♀ Member
Member # 39362
Default  Posted: 6:37 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry, it's a bummer to work around unfriendly people. We spend so much time at work, it's certainly better when people are nice.

I've generally found that when people are unfriendly at work (especially to the new people) it's because they're unhappy working there for one reason or another.

Be sure to set clear boundaries now. That way they know not to take advantage of you.


There is always a rainbow after every storm.

Posts: 401 | Registered: May 2013 | From: California
Lucky2HaveMe
♀ Member
Member # 13333
Default  Posted: 6:38 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Is it worth it? Does it cause you more stress than you are trying to relieve? UGH! No-brainer type jobs like that should be FUN - I mean otherwise, why bother.

Hope it gets better for you.


Indian wisdom says our lives are rivers. We are born somewhere small and quiet and we move toward a place we cannot see, but only imagine. From Tending Roses

Posts: 6382 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: WNY
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:43 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Rainbows, That's why I asked for my break today. I'm entitled to it and just because they forget or don't feel like giving it to me isn't my problem. 15 minutes to pee and eat a granola bar isn't too much to ask.

One of my friends said be happy I'm not like them. I have to not internalize it and realize that some people are just miserable.

Lucky2, Right now the stress does not outweigh the good parts. I get to see dogs all day! Today one of them walked over to the register for a treat and then laid at my feet and rolled over for belly rubs. I smile there every day.

So, as long as I don't let the assholes get me down I'll be fine. I just have to adjust. My other job is so different, it's such a warm, supportive environment that this is so foreign to me.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
Whalers11
♀ Member
Member # 27544
Default  Posted: 6:43 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My co-workers probably think I'm that unfriendly co-worker. I try not to be rude, but I won't go out of my way to engage you in personal conversation either. I am at work to earn a paycheck, not make friends. Plus I have some social anxiety as well as being introverted. I would try not to take it personally - some people are just not social.


Me: BGF - 33
Together 11+ years - not married, no children.
D-Day: 2/9/2010
OC Born: 10/9/2010
Status: He chose OW/OC and left immediately.

Posts: 2230 | Registered: Feb 2010
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:49 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I totally get it, Whalers. I don't expect to make friends there, don't want to. They're mostly my kids' ages or a little older. But I expect a good morning or a hello, or when being asked or told something to be asked or told politely. I don't speak rudely to people at work and I don't expect to be spoken rudely to, or ignored.

I'm okay with introverts, although I'm not one, I get it. But rude is rude.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
LosferWords
♂ Guide
Member # 30369
Default  Posted: 6:57 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just don't understand people like that, AN. Being an introvert does not equate to rudeness. I'm very introverted, but I am always cordial, professional, and respectful towards the people I work with.

These people just sound like grouchy a-holes.

Keep in mind, and I'm sure you probably know this, depending on the length of your shift, that 15 minute break is something that is likely legally entitled to you by labor laws, not something that your supervisor "graces" upon you if she feels like it.

What a bunch of jerks. Sending mojo that the situation improves.


Posts: 7060 | Registered: Dec 2010
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 7:03 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Being an introvert does not equate to rudeness. I'm very introverted, but I am always cordial, professional, and respectful towards the people I work with.
Exactly. Even when my husband is going thru an introverted thing, he's not a dick. He's polite and professional.

AN, this group of coworkers sounds like a bunch of jerks. I think you should take a giant batch of Exlax brownies and leave them in the break room. It may loosen up their constipated attitudes.

I kid, I kid. Maybe.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6227 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 7:05 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you, Losfer. When I asked for my break today it was 12:20. I was working until 1:00. I said, "C, is it okay if I take my 15 min?" and she said, "Well, not really.....fine, just go!"

I was stunned so I just walked away and took the break. On my break I was getting more and more pissed and decided to confront her. When I got back I asked, "Am I supposed to get a 15 minute break?" and she said, "Yes," so I said, "Well, I'm leaving at 1:00, when should I have taken it if it's now 12:40?" She said, "It's just that we're short a manager today," and I just said, "Oh..." and just stared at her because I couldn't really care less. Then she did a nervous giggle because I'm sure she was pretty surprised I called her on it.

And what about the other days that I practically had to beg for the break and not get one yesterday?

Not to make mountains out of molehills, I know there are many much worse problems in the world. I'm just venting.

DD can be shy, too, but she is always polite. I understand the difference. This is more than introverted people.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 7:07 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

AN, this group of coworkers sounds like a bunch of jerks. I think you should take a giant batch of Exlax brownies and leave them in the break room. It may loosen up their constipated attitudes.

This is even more funny to me because DD's old roommate was stealing her food and I encouraged her to put Miralax in her peanut butter so the thief would learn her lesson. H tsk tsked the idea. I thought it was brilliant .


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 7:09 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6227 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
Whalers11
♀ Member
Member # 27544
Default  Posted: 7:09 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree - no need to be rude. I say good morning if I walk by people on my way in. If someone wants to tell me about their weekend, I listen politely with a smile on my face even though I may be dying to walk away.


Me: BGF - 33
Together 11+ years - not married, no children.
D-Day: 2/9/2010
OC Born: 10/9/2010
Status: He chose OW/OC and left immediately.

Posts: 2230 | Registered: Feb 2010
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 7:11 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Whalers,

I can talk to anybody! I envy those with the ability to just be quiet!


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
Gottagetthrough
Member
Member # 27325
Default  Posted: 11:43 PM, April 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ugh, I worked retail in college and remember some people like that. One woman would say she was the Assistant to the Manager of the department we worked in. She was sort of like Dwight on The Office

Posts: 1379 | Registered: Jan 2010
MammaMia
♀ Member
Member # 34030
Default  Posted: 2:50 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do you work for WalMart? I know people who work there and the stories they have told me sound pretty much like yours. The breaks, the unfriendly people, the rude attitude.....

Ignore them ( hard to do , I know) do the work, collect your pay check and the heck with them.


And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive.But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.”

Posts: 865 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Somewhere in the South
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 5:31 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't watch The Office, but I feel like everybody there is a 'boss' of some sort. Give somebody a key, man and they go on a power trip....

No, it's not Walmart, but another big chain retailer.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37574 | Registered: Sep 2007
Ascendant
♂ Member
Member # 38303
Default  Posted: 7:39 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, I'm ashamed to say that I've been on *both* ends of that equation. I was that miserable, cranky person in the past....in my experience people like that are usually unhappy with life because they have very little going on in terms of long-term goals and outside-of-work fulfilling activities.

I work with people like that right now, and for most of them, they don't have anything meaningful going on outside out work.....and so their work is all that they fixate on...the issues, the stress, the bosses. That might be not so bad when you're working to cure cancer, but when you're only purposeful time of the day is spent inside a Big Box store where you feel (and sometimes are treated) like the tiniest of unimportant cogs in a giant machine, you tend to feel out of control in your life....and so you find ugly ways to assert some control where you can.

I got happier when I found other things to focus on outside of work. Hopefully those people do, too.

In the meantime, though, it sounds as though you're handling it just fine. You just have to be super clear about your boundaries and the sorts of behavior you'll accept, or those people will dance all over you.


I refuse to let a wound ruin me.
**Guts over fear.**

Posts: 2075 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Illinois
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 8:00 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Keep insisting on your break, absolutely. And focus on them doggies!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4159 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
jo2love
♀ Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 9:34 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry you have to put up with those doofbunnies. I try to pretend that something is wrong with them. Maybe they have a rash somewhere and it itches like crazy, but they can't scratch it in the middle of a store. Picture them thinking, "I want to scratch. I NEED to scratch. OMG OMG OMG I HAVE TO SCRATCH. AGH I CAN'T scratch someone will see. AGHHHHH I HATE people! Don't look at me!!!!!"

(um yeah I am running on very little sleep and only 1 tea.)



Today one of them walked over to the register for a treat and then laid at my feet and rolled over for belly rubs.

So freakin' cute!!!!

[This message edited by SI Staff at 9:44 AM, April 18th (Friday)]


Posts: 35156 | Registered: Mar 2011
metamorphisis
♀ Administrator
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 10:19 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh Lord AN. Maybe about a decade ago I did some waitressing. Worked at 4 different places over 3 years (sometimes simultaneously). 2 were fine and 2 places were absolutely cutthroat and bitchy and because I wasn't 19 or involved in all the inane drama it was like I was an alien. It was awful. Yes you get your break.. keep asking for it. And if this place doesn't work out that's a shame but it's not on you. Just keep smiling and enjoy those pups.
As a customer YOU are the person I want to see. I want to chat your ear off about my pup and let you rub his belly .
My dd is 17, and while she would be shy I am sure, I am certain she would never act like that to anyone. She's the kid who still thinks her teachers are people and if one is really cranky she wonders if something is going on at home with them. Not all young people are like that thank goodness.



“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.”... Anais Nin

Posts: 44688 | Registered: Sep 2006
Topic Posts: 26
Pages: 1 · 2

Return to Forum: Off Topic Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.