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New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: I hate dating steriotypes.... why can't women approach men?
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 10:01 AM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I wouldn't make meeting new people/possibility of a new romantic connection the only reason I went to church though. IMHO, that's totally the wrong reason to go to church.

It wouldn't be the only reason. My grandmother (my dad's mom) died a few years ago right after both my dad and my D-day. My mom and her OM left the church (yes they went to my church ) recently because OM got accused of "inappropriate touching" of other members....he is....was an usher. My dad goes alone and I think he would be tickled to death if I started coming again. I used to be very active in my church. Met my best friend of 23 years in the bell choir there! My daughter had a blast on Easter Sunday and I stayed with her in the child watch... but I would actually like to go to the service some too. I have missed it and would like to renew my faith again. And, now that mom and OM are gone...it won't be so awkward anymore....

My chances at romance are very low on my priority list right now anyways.....I have way too much on my plate to worry about that. If it happens it happens....if not....no spilled milk here.

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 10:02 AM, April 24th (Thursday)]


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2721 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
SeanFLA
♂ Member
Member # 32380
Default  Posted: 10:07 AM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think if you meet a guy at church great! You know in days gone by people went to church not only to worship, but primarily to meet a compatible partner. It was part of the social aspect of it. To meet someone of your religious background and shared similar beliefs about marriage, family and morals. Might have the chance at meeting a quality guy for a change right? At least if he's there early on a Sunday morning, you probably know he wasn't rolling in at 4am all hungover cause he was trolling the local bars all night for divorced women right?


BS(me) 48
WW 46
1 son 14 yrs old
Married 18 yrs, together 21 yrs

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." ~ Bob Marley


Posts: 1468 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Zombie Land
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 2:37 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

At least if he's there early on a Sunday morning, you probably know he wasn't rolling in at 4am all hungover cause he was trolling the local bars all night for divorced women right?

Very good point!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2721 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
justasinger
♂ Member
Member # 43031
Default  Posted: 4:37 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was very shy back in the day. Not with everyone, just with girls that I liked. Couldn't even say hi to them. And now, I don't think there's even a remote chance that I would speak to anyone of the opposite sex that I was even remotely attracted to, not IRL anyway. Of course I'm in no position to date, and won't be anytime soon. But it would definitely be an ego boost to have an attractive woman strike up a conversation with me.


BSO -me 38
WSO - her 30
2x DD ages 6 and 4
D-day #1 APR08 (supposed ONS w/OM)
D-day #2 1JAN13 2x ONS w/OM and OW, and a ONS
D-day #3 22APR14 (admitted to another ONS that she didn't fess up to during DDay #2)

Posts: 164 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: New England
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 6:41 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The beauty about being a woman is we can talk to anyone without them thinking we're hitting on them (even if we are ). Most men don't notice we're interested.

Just start up a conversation.

I'm an extroverted introvert - I talk to everyone, it's just in my nature. "Hi, I'm ....." is a good conversation starter. I've found myself going for the quiet ones these days.

I met one of my loveliest beaus at a swimming lesson with my girls. My big girl jumped out of the water and head butted me so hard I got a black eye. I was sitting there dripping wet with my two little girls playing doctor with me and helping me hold an ice pack to my eye. I joke about nobody believing my story and say to the cute guy next to me that he'd better not sit too close lest people think he did it. He laughed out loud. We struck up a conversation and each time I saw him after that he'd remark on the progress of my shiner.

About the third or fourth time we saw each other he asked for my number. We dated for a few months and he told me he had noticed me for a while but never would have approached me because he's kinda shy. He was a BH and divorced 2 years. God he was lovely. It didn't work out because it was waaaay to soon for me. Still is. We're still friends and I introduced him to his current GF - I'm a great wingman.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5558 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
wonderpets
♂ Member
Member # 35901
Default  Posted: 1:39 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am not shy at all about meeting women. I have always been able to approach a woman I was interested in, and write off frequent failures easily.

That being said, my second wife went after me quite a bit. I tend to not pay attention to subtle signals, so I kept on ignoring her advances until for some reason it finally clicked. I had always thought her to be attractive and interesting, but I never thought she would be the type to go for me.

Anyways, the point is that sometimes a guy might overlook a woman for some reason or another. When I found out my wife was interested in me, I went after her with everything I had. She is a loved and cherished woman, and I always thank her for finding me.

The point is, sometimes guys might write a girl off as out of their league, or just not someone that would be attracted to them, even if there is no good reason. If you take the first step, they might be happy to take every other step they need to keep you around.


Posts: 203 | Registered: Jun 2012
kg201
♂ Member
Member # 40173
Default  Posted: 11:45 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wait, isn't that what coffee hour after the service is for? Attach a note to the back of your toddler's back, aim her in beautiful man's direction, and let her go. The little ragamuffin will have you sipping lattes together before you know it.


Me: BH, 39
Her: WW, 40
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, ongoing
Dday: 7/28/13
Divorcing, 3 children
---------------------------------
"There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity." -S

Posts: 697 | Registered: Aug 2013
Topic Posts: 27
Pages: 1 · 2

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