He will also wonder how you will stay faithful though a long marriage if you fall to temptation before your relationship is off the starting blocks. Make sure you have answers to these questions from BF.
As regards your confession; you can be totally up front and tell him brutally what happened, regarding your need for sex and physical contact; which may be too much for him to handle. Or you can claim that you were drunk to the point of not being able the think straight and the OM took advantage of you. Your 'crime' would then not be so much cheating, but inappropriate excessive consumption of alcohol, which rendered you unable to resist.. I can see confession being the right thing to do, but I fear if you don't bias your account in favor of being near paralytic, you might lose him. Which would be a personal tragedy since you are definitely not lacking in remorse.
I see in the wayward forum confession is quite rightfully deemed the correct approach. However is there allowance for the confession of an ONS being essentially accurate as regards the physical details, but slightly distorted as regard the degree of culpability of the WS. Watered down honesty.
As usual HGF, it will be your decision, but I fear telling him that you cheated because of loneliness and strong physical contact needs will not sit well.
1. Were you his first one as well? First relationship, first/only girl he has ever slept with?
2. You said
if he had skype, I have a feeling this would not have happened.
3. You also wrote:
Hopefully I will have answers soon, because if I ever gave him anything, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.
If I understand correctly, you haven't been with him since this happened? So there's no way you gave him anything?
4. May I ask how drunk were you when you met this other guy and decided to go with him?
Thanks for your answers. I appreciate and admire your strength!
As to how drunk I was... That's irrelivant. I had to much to drink...... Most of the night is blurry. When I think back, it felt like the entire thing (from the time we met till the time I left) lasted all of 2 hours (about as much as I recall) but it was more like 12. I do remember at one point telling him that I had a boyfriend.. some time before the act occurred. But yet it still happened.. If I was capable of saying "I have a boyfriend" I was more then capable of saying "no".
And no, my bf and I haven't slept together since, but if I was to get something that did not present symptoms, or I did not get screened for, and the relationship were to mend, I wouldn't want to give him anything in the future (or anyone else for that matter). I realize our relationship is (if it survives) a long way from being intimate again. But still. Also, upon writing most of that, I was still unsure if I was telling him or not. here was still the thought I should keep my mouth shut. But I've decided 100% to tell him. so that doesn't matter now either.