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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Difference between goodbye and letting go
MadeOfScars
♂ Member
Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 4:13 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not sure I 100% agree with the quote, but it struck me nonetheless so I thought I'd share. It seemed apropos to post in S/D.

“There's a difference between saying good bye and letting go. Saying good bye is "I'll see you again when I'm ready to hold your hand, and when you're ready to hold mine." Letting go is "I'll miss your hand. But I realized it's not mine to hold, and I will never hold it again.”

― Unknown


“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ― Rumi

Posts: 1225 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
homewrecked2011
♀ Member
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 4:16 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Like it.

Also could say, "I'll miss your hand. But I realized I'm better off not holding it, and I will never hold it again.”

― Unknown


me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed

Posts: 2210 | Registered: Jan 2012
nomoreblueskies
♀ New Member
Member # 41574
Default  Posted: 4:19 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And infidelity is "I'll miss your hand. But I'm not quite sure where it's been and I'm worried about touching it."


It's life, Jim, but not as we know it

Posts: 23 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: uk
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 4:22 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And infidelity is "I'll miss your hand. But I'm not quite sure where it's been and I'm worried about touching it."


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9824 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
MadeOfScars
♂ Member
Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 4:24 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I like both new takes on the quote! It is from "unknown' after all, so take credit for your own adaptation


“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ― Rumi

Posts: 1225 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
nekorb
♀ Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 5:17 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And infidelity is "I'll miss your hand. But I'm not quite sure where it's been and I'm worried about touching it."

how I wish there was an emoticon that rolled around while laughing!!

But seriously - I have to think about the original quote some more- not quite sure I agree or fully grasp it or something...


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
Whalers11
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Member # 27544
Default  Posted: 5:21 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

To me, saying goodbye is making a choice to walk away from something you know is not good for you. I think letting go is more of a passive action, like resigning yourself to having to do it because you have no other choice.


Me: BGF - 33
Together 11+ years - not married, no children.
D-Day: 2/9/2010
OC Born: 10/9/2010
Status: He chose OW/OC and left immediately.

Posts: 2257 | Registered: Feb 2010
Bravenewgirl
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Member # 36267
Default  Posted: 5:35 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

and divorce is "I am not talking to you about your hand. Stop texting me about your hand. Kids and finances, not hands. Any further communication about your hand should go to my attorney".


Don't come around here no more
-Tom Petty

Posts: 661 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Canada
deena04
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Member # 41741
Default  Posted: 5:44 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Love both versions of it. The touching hand really cracked me up. I'm at work and work at a college. The students started looking at me funny when I started laughing.


Me BS mid-late 30s
Him WS knocking on 40 (lovemywife4ever)
blended family with lots of kiddos
together 5 years, married 8/13
D day 12/1/13
WH ONS had been 4/12
Getting ME back and moving to HAPPY - whatever that means
I want out!

Posts: 1070 | Registered: Dec 2013
MadeOfScars
♂ Member
Member # 42231
Default  Posted: 6:23 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

To me, saying goodbye is making a choice to walk away from something you know is not good for you. I think letting go is more of a passive action, like resigning yourself to having to do it because you have no other choice.

I think this is what kinda bugged me about this quote too. I'm inclined to agree with you Whalers11, though there maybe isn't a "right" answer here.

Still laughing at your version nomoreblueskies


“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ― Rumi

Posts: 1225 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Texas
justinpaintoday
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Member # 42858
Default  Posted: 6:26 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And infidelity is "I'll miss your hand. But I'm not quite sure where it's been and I'm worried about touching it."

LOL


I never realized you could be in this much pain and not be dying.

Posts: 700 | Registered: Mar 2014
Kajem
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Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 6:50 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

To me: Saying goodbye is closing the door never to be opened again. Letting go means the door isn't locked, under the right circumstances it could be opened again.


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 6:50 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And infidelity is "I'll miss your hand. But I'm not quite sure where it's been and I'm worried about touching it."

Or as in my case: "I have NFI who the fucks hand I was I holding all this time."


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Gemini71
♀ Member
Member # 40115
Default  Posted: 7:42 PM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

nomoreblueskies needs some hand sanitizer stat!


For me too, the goodbye is more permanent than letting go. With STBXH, I would always say, "Good night my love," before going to sleep. To end the phone conversation on D-Day #2 when he confessed to sleeping with my BFF I said, "Goodbye my love." I knew it was the end and that's exactly what I meant.


Edited to correct stupid typos.

Two steps forward and one step backwards, is still progress.


Posts: 1860 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Illinois, USA
Topic Posts: 14

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