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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: she moved out two weeks ago
Midas
♂ Member
Member # 22832
Default  Posted: 8:00 PM, April 23rd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So an update on my situation. My STBXWW moved out two weeks ago, last week the OM ended up back in jail for violating probation when he PO caught him with my STBXWW. (Due to the fact that he is a sex offender, he has to inform his PO of all relationships with women especially if they have children. Which he didn't do.) Turns out he was also sleeping with three other women, so my STBXWW doesn't want anything to do with him anymore.

So yay,I don't have to worry about that relationship anymore coming back to dump more bullshit on me in the future. Tested clean in February for all STDs, going to go get tested again in a few months hopefully everything comes back clean again, but I'm starting to worry that it won't. She is experiencing symptoms of herpes, while I have't noticed anything on me.

In my life, I took a motorcycle safety course and got my motorcycle license and then got a motorcycle. Brand new leftover 2012 Honda Shadow 750, awesome deal on it too. I went out riding with my father last weekend and it was exhilarating and a great bonding experience. I don't miss my STBXWW all that much, I miss how she made me feel when I thought she loved me, but I don't miss HER. I'm living good while she struggles to pay her bills even with my child support payments.

I have to say I spend most of my days happy now. However there are a few days where I just don't feel like getting out of bed, not sad, just too tired. Being a single parent even part time is harder work than being a parent in a marriage, but I'm getting better at it.

[This message edited by Midas at 8:01 PM, April 23rd (Wednesday)]


Midas
Me - 37 (BS)
Her - 36 (STBXWW)

OM#1-4 Dday 2/17/2014 pre-marriage
OM#5 - Dday 2/17/2014 <new info>
OM#6 - Dday 4/30/2006
OM#7 - Dday 1/29/2014

DD - 6yo

Filed for D 2/10/2014


Posts: 99 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Austin, Texas
justinpaintoday
♂ Member
Member # 42858
Default  Posted: 8:12 PM, April 23rd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good for you brother....mine moves out in a couple weeks and truthfully look forward to being able to detach and finish healing.


I never realized you could be in this much pain and not be dying.

Posts: 700 | Registered: Mar 2014
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 8:28 PM, April 23rd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congrats on the bike Midas. I'm sorry there is still fallout from your STBXWW but you seem to be getting into a very healthy place. Good for you! You deserve it.


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4017 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
sunsetslost
♂ Member
Member # 39885
Default  Posted: 11:22 PM, April 23rd (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Great update Midas. Keep fighting the fight. The rewards will come.


Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

Posts: 719 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: The beach.
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 7:11 AM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Now that she's out of your space you're no longer in survival mode so your body/mind will go through a few transitions.

Keep reclaiming your space and your life. It has been a very long road for his friend - you're through the roughest parts. The rest is adjustment and rebuilding.

You'll find your groove soon enough.


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5525 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
PhantomLimb
♀ Member
Member # 39668
Default  Posted: 7:16 AM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I very much relate to these two statements:

I don't miss my STBXWW all that much, I miss how she made me feel when I thought she loved me, but I don't miss HER.

I have to say I spend most of my days happy now. However there are a few days where I just don't feel like getting out of bed, not sad, just too tired.

It sounds like you are healing really thoroughly and well and putting your life back together. Even allowing yourself the recognition that sometimes you can still have a bad moment or just feel tired seems like a major thing to me-- you are letting yourself feel whatever you have to feel and owning it and moving on.

((hugs))

Keep doing everything you're doing!


BS / D

Posts: 863 | Registered: Jun 2013
allatsea
♂ Member
Member # 38923
Default  Posted: 6:08 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Being a single parent even part time is harder work than being a parent in a marriage, but I'm getting better at it.

I relate to this. I give my all when I'm with the children. I'm being mummy and daddy to them whilst also helping them through everything she did to them.

I'm a better dad now than I was in marriage.


Me 40
WW 38
Together 19 years
Married for 9
DS(1) 9
DS(2) 7
Dday 10th Feb 2013
She moved in with POS and took kids 23rd Mar 2013. WW now pregnant
Divorced April 2014

Posts: 651 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: UK
Midas
♂ Member
Member # 22832
Default  Posted: 4:57 PM, April 26th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Found out today, I and my soon to be ex have herpes. Wonderful!

I have only ever had sex with one person and now I have an STD.

[This message edited by Midas at 4:59 PM, April 26th (Saturday)]


Midas
Me - 37 (BS)
Her - 36 (STBXWW)

OM#1-4 Dday 2/17/2014 pre-marriage
OM#5 - Dday 2/17/2014 <new info>
OM#6 - Dday 4/30/2006
OM#7 - Dday 1/29/2014

DD - 6yo

Filed for D 2/10/2014


Posts: 99 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Austin, Texas
justinpaintoday
♂ Member
Member # 42858
Default  Posted: 5:02 PM, April 26th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Dude sorry to hear that. Stay strong. I think they have medicine to control that.


I never realized you could be in this much pain and not be dying.

Posts: 700 | Registered: Mar 2014
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 5:50 PM, April 26th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry Midas. That is awful, just awful.

The sad clown passed it to me too. A few months after we met we both went I and got tested, I went on the pill and we stopped using condoms.

About 6m later we were living together and he confesses he has HSV1. I can't believe I didn't kick him to the curb back then. He didn't tell me and allowed me to expose myself. He had had blisters in the early days but told me it was friction.

5 years later I had my first blister at 7m pregnant. I've only had 3 since then (so in 6 years).

The difficult part is informing new partners. I've been very open and upfront but I can't say I'm not angry that I have something to tell them.

You're going to be OK.


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5525 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 7:32 PM, April 26th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

last week the OM ended up back in jail for violating probation when he PO caught him with my STBXWW. (Due to the fact that he is a sex offender, he has to inform his PO of all relationships with women especially if they have children. Which he didn't do.) Turns out he was also sleeping with three other women

What an amazing guy. I don't know how your STBXWW could possibly give him up.

Sorry about the STD. Hopefully you can get started on a med to get it under control.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9458 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Topic Posts: 11

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