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User Topic: Rough day
bionicgal
♀ Member
Member # 39803
Default  Posted: 10:29 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Jrazz)))
I hope you have a peaceful night.


me - BS (40s)
DDay - June 2013, A was 2+ months, EA then PA
In MC & Reconciling
An affair is more like a mental break than a relationship.

I edit, therefore I am.


Posts: 1998 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
Rebreather
♀ Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 10:32 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You know you got all I have to give. I hope, well. I hope.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6491 | Registered: Jan 2011
tired girl
♀ Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 11:05 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you so much for your welcome back in the face of what you have going on.

Sending all my good thoughts and I hope that tomorrow brings better things for the both of you.

(((Jrazz)))


Me45 Him 45 Hardlessons DS 25,23,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

Posts: 4957 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
918Mama
♀ Member
Member # 37756
Default  Posted: 11:09 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Did you hear Jem and the holograms are making a new movie?!?

You have so much love and support coming your way. But if you need someone to junk punch Crazz, I'm sure that can be arranged.

I'm so sorry Jrazz. Big hugs coming your way.


Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be. -- Sonia Ricotti

Posts: 578 | Registered: Dec 2012
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 11:12 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

918momma, I'll hold your earrings and then you can hold mine. I have a wicked snap-kick!

Seriously, you know that you're in my heart and in my prayers, luv. I'm praying that tomorrow is a better day for you. (((hugs)))


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4857 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Rebreather
♀ Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 11:17 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG!! TG!! Hi!!

/tj


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6491 | Registered: Jan 2011
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 11:19 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I appreciate where you ladies are coming from, but honestly I don't want to hurt him. Also we should take it easy because he is a member and it's one of my fondest hopes that he comes here someday for help.

I feel sorry for him. He had a childhood of judgement and confusion, and he learned to protect himself by lying, and to grab at good times where he can. There is a kindness in him, but when he feels a flicker of emotion other than anger he doesn't know how to process it and the flight response kicks in. He just wants to be happy, but he's a shitty partner along the way because he is completely devoid of empathy.

I don't know if any of this is making sense. I want us both to be happy, but we live in different realities, and the one he constructs around himself scares the crap out of me.


If life is just a series of ridiculous attempts to be alive, you're a hero. - J. Winger

Posts: 17536 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
918Mama
♀ Member
Member # 37756
Default  Posted: 11:22 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh Jrazz...

I couldn't like you more. To have that kind of compassion for him still...it's very admirable.

I hope you are able to work out a reality that you can both thrive in.


Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be. -- Sonia Ricotti

Posts: 578 | Registered: Dec 2012
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 11:26 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh I'm no saint... I used up my next ten years worth of curse words in two texts and a short phone call tonight.


If life is just a series of ridiculous attempts to be alive, you're a hero. - J. Winger

Posts: 17536 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
918Mama
♀ Member
Member # 37756
Default  Posted: 11:42 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

**snort**

There's no emoticon for that. But that made me belly laugh Jrazz.

Hang in there friend. And if you need 'em, I can loan you some of my profanity! :-)


Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be. -- Sonia Ricotti

Posts: 578 | Registered: Dec 2012
Chrysalis123
♀ Member
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 11:44 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh no.... I am so sorry to hear about this.


Donít get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well.†

Posts: 2683 | Registered: Jan 2010
knightsbff
♀ Member
Member # 36853
Default  Posted: 11:44 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((Jrazz)))))

Sending lots of prayers and mojo for you.

I know you will be ok. You're awesome like that! But I want to give you a hug anyway. ((((Another hug))))


FWW 40's
D-day August 27, 2012
3 kids and 2 dogs

Posts: 1449 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Deep South, USA
ShellyShell
♀ Member
Member # 42662
Default  Posted: 11:49 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Girl those curse words were God's work! That's what the creator intended for him to hear. LOL! Your sainthood is preserved. :)

Hugs and laughs make everything better! Sending you both.


Posts: 95 | Registered: Mar 2014
tired girl
♀ Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 11:57 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

t/j

HI Rebreather!!!!

end t/j



Me45 Him 45 Hardlessons DS 25,23,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

Posts: 4957 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 11:59 PM, April 24th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'll take all the hugs you can spare.

Can I just say that I'm getting lots of happiness that tired girl is posting on my thread?


If life is just a series of ridiculous attempts to be alive, you're a hero. - J. Winger

Posts: 17536 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
tired girl
♀ Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 12:05 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ahhh Jrazz. I feel horrible that you are going through this again. As I know what you are feeling.

I was going to say earlier but wasn't sure if I should or not that I know exactly what you are talking about when you explained a little of what you are dealing with.

The desire to protect yourself in these situations can be strong. I am glad that you are staying so connected to your daughter.

Big hugs. I hope tomorrow he comes through for you.


Me45 Him 45 Hardlessons DS 25,23,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

Posts: 4957 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
h0peless
♂ Member
Member # 36697
Default  Posted: 12:17 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hope you manage some sleep tonight. Sorry you're going through this.

Posts: 1694 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Baja Arizona
Kajem
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 5:31 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Jrazz,

It's early morning here, even earlier there! I hope you were able to get some rest.

Sending love your way today.

K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5161 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 6:26 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I read this and cried.

He had a childhood of judgement and confusion, and he learned to protect himself by lying, and to grab at good times where he can. There is a kindness in him, but when he feels a flicker of emotion other than anger he doesn't know how to process it and the flight response kicks in. He just wants to be happy

I so understand this.

(((hugs))) to you both. I know you are hurting.He is too, in a different, self-inflicted way, but still hurting.

You are so kind and generous to acknowledge his need for help too.

I pray he finds his way and the two of you can continue your healing.


ďAnd the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossomĒ
AnaÔs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3822 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 6:56 AM, April 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Coming back around to ya Jrazz

(((Jrazz)))


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2153 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
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