In my case, the OW used to be the PTA person at my school. I was more than happy to share exactly what kind of person she is. Again, I wasn't lying and I have proof in her own writing as to what she's done. I felt that these people had a right to know the POS she really is.

That was as close to revenge as I could get and is as far as I would go. Not that I haven't had a little more sinister thoughts, but I would never act on them. I believe what you put out into the universe you get back. The actions of the cheaters will eventually catch up to them. All they are doing are tearing up families and crushing souls. No good can come from that. They will get theirs one day.

They then concocted a story about how she was consoling Mr. V. about what an adulterous W I was. What a "good friend" OW was being to XH. Oh, yeah, btw, we're now dating.

Meanwhile, I'd lost 30 pounds in 2 months & looked like skelator. So that little stunt at the party where they tried telling people that I was the WW pretty much gave it away.

XH had demanded I protect OW & go along w/that story. People started approaching me w/in days of the party asking if XH was having an A.

I agree w/the other folks who've said it's not your secret to keep. It really isn't. I think that they tend to give themselves away fairly easily, anyhow.

I think if you just state the facts, cleanly and concisely, you look like the BS, not vindictive, or crazy. "I'm sad to say that I'm divorcing Bill b/c of his continued affair w/Mary." That simple.