Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: Nexttome (45693)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Whew - exhausted.
Tripletrouble
♀ Member
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 6:00 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Another weekend left to fend for myself with this house and yard. That stinkin yard! I wanted to stay in my house to keep things as stable as possible for the kids, but this yard is killing me. I also realized how much was neglected last summer when we were in the throes of post D Day.

In other news, I am a yard badass. It looks awesome out there.

Can someone bring me some Aleve? I can't move.

I have to admit though, while I was doing all this stuff I was stewing on how I shouldn't HAVE to be doing this alone. I shouldn't HAVE to be taking care of the house, the kids, the finances, working full time, etc and I realized I am in a new stage - resentment. Another divorced friend called in the middle of her meltdown to express the exact same thing - her resentment at being left to handle everything alone. It sucks, and I hate it.


40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller


Posts: 638 | Registered: May 2013
inconnu
♀ Member
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 7:01 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

resentment at being left to handle everything alone.

This is probably the last issue to linger for me. I did not sign up to be a single person homeowner. Every time there's an issue with the house or yard, it pushes that button for me. I'm getting much better at shrugging it off, though. I just keep reminding myself how much better off I am now, despite having to deal with crap I don't want to do.


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 12169 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
Williesmom
♀ Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 7:03 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Uh,....my WXH was such a lazy POS that the only thing that changed when he left was....less laundry.

Seriously. With that said, I've been doing all of the yard work and maintenance for years, and I'm tired of it also.

I thought the same thing as I laid under a farm tractor for the annual oil change. I'm just tired of it.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7810 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 7:59 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

On the other hand--you are kicking ass doing it alone, even though it's hard! Be proud of yourself.

(((Triple trouble)))

I'm sure the yard looks awesome


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4203 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
deena
♀ Member
Member # 27275
Default  Posted: 9:13 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Like Williesmom the only thing that will change will be less laundry and doing what I want with everything else. My WH is "at work" 6:30 am to at least 7:30pm 6 days a week. Then comes home to eat and watch sports for the rest of his time.

I won't feel any extra work.


Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's
better to leave them broken than to hurt
yourself putting it back together.


Posts: 3115 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Canada
StillLivin
♀ Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 9:55 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Uh,....my WXH was such a lazy POS that the only thing that changed when he left was....less laundry.


This except for the laundry. He usually did his own. BUT, I won't have to clean something, him mess it up 5 minutes later, and me constantly going back and cleaning again.
Now, I clean or dust something once, and it doesn't have to be cleaned again until dust settles a week or two later!
TT good for you getting that yard lookin snazzy!
FTG, you got this. And it's a great work out too! Getting the house looking good for sale, check; getting toned and sexy, check!!!


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2478 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
Bluebird26
♀ Member
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 5:42 AM, April 28th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah don't miss the laundry or cleaning up his royal highness either!

I actually used to do all the outside work as well but now I am working more hours so just don't have time to do it anymore. I splurged and got someone in to the mowing and edging. It's well worth the $30 it costs me and saves me 3 or so hours.


"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.

Posts: 1374 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
nekorb
♀ Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 6:30 AM, April 28th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

:::sending virtual aleve:::

Good for you for getting that handled!!! I'll bet the yard looks great.

I totally hear you in the doing things alone issue. It isn't that I can't do it, it's that I wanted someone to share this stuff - LIFE- with.

I hope you treated yourself to a cold drink while you lounged in your lawn chair admiring your work.


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
Topic Posts: 8

Return to Forum: Divorce/Separation Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.