Topic: Mini victory - I can handle my shit without you
Member # 40306
| Posted: 10:22 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014|
As you all know, in-house S still happening. Ugh.
Anyway, I headed out to do some work in the yard and my mower wouldn't cooperate. WH wasn't home. I woke my son up to see if he could help. No luck. Got out the manual, DS looked up videos on you tube. We tried a few things. Decided we needed a part from the hardware store. I considered crying. I felt like crying. I refused to do it.
WH pulled in briefly to say he was going to store xyz, but did I need him to stay and help? Nope. You go on to the store.
I went to hardware store. Brought home new part. Installed part. No response from equipment. I'm like, wtf? Tears threatened again - how can a lawn mower make you feel completely alone? I decide to call my dad, because, you know, he can fix *everything*.
So, dad and I discuss the situation, get a game plan going on, decide we need some starter fluid, I'm checking for air intake.
WH rolls on up and parks, grabs starter fluid from cabinet and sprays it on intake as I relay instructions from dad. I pull the starter, mower bursts to life. I say, "Thanks dad!". Hang up. WH asks if I want help. Do I need him to do anything?
Me and my purring mower walk away.
I only cried a little bit in the car on the way home from the hardware store.
I can handle my shit without you.
I am going to be ok.
Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.
Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
Member # 10506
| Posted: 10:35 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014|
I am so PROUD of you!!!
I have to admit that my mower did make me cry. X left me with a defective mower that would stall every 5 minutes. I tried and tried to fix it and had no clue how to. Finally my brother came to visit and said I needed new spark plug and to clean in air intake something-or-other. It was enough to get me thru the summer.
I also cried several times why trying to fix a toilet that ran 24/7. 5 or 6 trips to the hardware store and still the fucker was not right. I gave up and 6 months later called a plumber who just replaced the whole damn thing. Fail
But a week ago I was able to replace my leaky kitchen faucet!! It took a few trips to the hardware store and lots of research online, but I finally did it! I felt like I could conquer the world!!!!
Sometimes it is the little things that we did not think we could do and yet we do them anyway
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine
Posts: 17695 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: A better place :)
Member # 33129
| Posted: 10:38 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014|
Yeay for you! How awesome, you did it!
Feels great, eh?
divorced the Dooosh
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
Posts: 3618 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
Member # 27148
| Posted: 11:00 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014|
I can handle my shit without you.
I am going to be ok.
Recovery in action!
Donít get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well.†
Posts: 2726 | Registered: Jan 2010
Member # 36134
| Posted: 11:16 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014|
See you're not as incompetent as he made you feel!!!!
I was left with the lawnmower that he hated,it was over 20 years old, and the edger that hated women operators! I sold the edger in a yard sale to a neighbor - it started right up for him! I ended up buying a newer mower and weed whacker thing that you change from edger to weed whacker to pole saw and other things. I love them!!!!
It is always empowering when I defeat his demon by doing things his voice said I couldn't. Even if his voice is inside my head- I like telling it to shut up and showing it up by proving it wrong! Even if it's only in my head!
I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
Posts: 5321 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Member # 42971
| Posted: 11:42 PM, April 27th (Sunday), 2014|
CONGRATULATIONS!!! Yes, you CAN handle things without him!! I am so proud of you. I am proud of anyone that at least tries to do things they normally haven't had to deal with!! You rocked that lawnmower issue - be proud of yourself!!!
Posts: 71 | Registered: Apr 2014
Member # 33226
| Posted: 12:17 AM, April 28th (Monday), 2014|
((((nekorb)))) Well done, you.
You can call me NIK
"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana
Posts: 25835 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 32554
| Posted: 12:22 AM, April 28th (Monday), 2014|
Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
Posts: 9852 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Member # 37215
| Posted: 1:37 AM, April 28th (Monday), 2014|
Here I am ~ a grown ass woman and I want to fist bump you and give you a hug! You are so awesome!!
Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."
Posts: 2284 | Registered: Oct 2012
Member # 35229
| Posted: 4:04 AM, April 28th (Monday), 2014|
Feels amazing, doesn't it? Love this.
I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!
Posts: 5618 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 36445
| Posted: 5:03 AM, April 28th (Monday), 2014|
Completing a 'man job' makes you feel great. You got this!
"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.
Posts: 1363 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
|Topic Posts: 11|