I offer this advise because I did everything wrong and would be in a much better place now if I had done these things.
Do not trickle truth. Get it all out no matter how painful it is. I TT'd for literally years and will never recover from it.
Try to put yourself in your betrayed husbands shoes and think what it would be like to have this dropped on you.
Remember that your betrayed husbands reaction may be very numb at first but the anger will probably build over time and then it will continue to be an emotional roller coaster after that.
Read as much as you can. I highly recommend reading "How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair". I try to read it often as it really helps me put myself in my wife's shoes. Not Just Friends was also a really important read for waywards.
Do not for a minute underestimate how devastating this is. Reading will help you understand this. Whether it was one night or you lived a completely double life, the trust is still destroyed.
If you are truly wanting to recover, you need to be ready to commit yourself to digging deep inside of yourself to understand how you could have made the choice to cheat. I am still digging into myself and it has been years so far.Me: WH
Father of 3 beautiful girls
Do as I say, NOT as I did. :-(
I acknowledge the grace I have received. I do not deserve it.