Child-like behavior regarding him mentioning 6 am channel programming changes.
Sadly, I was a user of porn for decades. My wife did too. We used it together, we used it solo. It was a false intimacy we both reached for. I used it more than she, but now see it like I do an affair. ONS or LTA.....the destruction is the destruction.
14 months porn free and it feels great. I am learning to bounce my eyes and suppress my thoughts (12 step process to break my addiction/habit/compulsion). I am hopeful your husband became aware of programming changes as part of a process to break free from porn. His relaying his "knowledge" to you was inappropriate. You will notice a change in him all on your own as he breaks free from porn.
I understand your disgust regarding porn. I am disgusted by my own actions. But I do know I must take extra precautions to stay away from this temptation.....I am weak in this area and need my boundaries.
In a recent therapy session we discussed my turning away from porn. It was with a heavy heart I admitted I did not stop for or because of my wife (she was pretty much checked out of our M at that time.....may still have been using porn as far as I knew). I stopped as part of my 180.
I saw it for what it was.....sexual sin. I saw it was blocking my relationship with God. I desired that relationship to grow, so I had to repent. Sin blocks this relationship.
Therapist said I am in a healthier spot because of my motivation to quit. Said if I had quit for my wife it would have been a throw back to my codependent ways (I'll win my wife's love back.....sort of thing).
The healthiest thing would have been if I went to my wife early in our relationship and said something like "I love you. Porn is hurting my relationship with you and keeping me from a deeper relationship with God. I am going to get help and stop. I would appreciate your forgiveness and support as I change."
But I am not stuck in the past. I am grateful I have broken this cycle in my life.
By the way.....using porn is hardly ever about sex. (One of the lies I told myself to allow myself to keep using it). It is a void-filler, a coping mech. I reached for it when I felt isolated. My go-to male friend I lean on after my wife's A used it when he was under stress. I shared my struggle with a select group of 4 guys at work. 3 have struggled with this temptation too....."just sex" was never cited as a reason. The 4th guy chooses and embraces porn.
Long response.....anything porn related triggers me.
I WAS "that guy".
I am sorry for my choices.
I am proof a person can break out of that bondage.
Every Mans Battle by Steve Arterburn was a key start to this journey to change.
It's not your battle to fight for your husband, but do you know if he actually has a plan or is part of a program? Just avoiding temptation is part of it, but there is way more than that....for starters, he needs to backfill those voids in him that porn was filling. Backfill with healthy, constructive habits. He most likely doesn't know what that is and is part of the reason he chose porn to begin with. IC will help him understand himself better.
4-6 weeks of no porn.....that is when a shift inside me occurred.
I'm sorry for your continued pain. I'm sorry I was like so many other men out there. I'm sorry I used "societal norms" to justify a destructive choice.