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Wayward Side     Print Topic    
User Topic: Finding our way
stormrider38
♂ New Member
Member # 43409
Default  Posted: 10:06 PM, May 16th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WS Only

[This message edited by SI Staff at 10:26 PM, May 16th (Friday)]


Posts: 12 | Registered: May 2014 | From: York, PA
emaline
♀ New Member
Member # 43401
Default  Posted: 2:23 PM, May 18th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I feel sorry for you that you do not know the God I know. The God that is kind and compassionate. Who does not say pull yourself up by your boot straps, but the one who wants to have a deeply intimate relationship with you so that you can benefit from His infinite all knowing guidance to lead you so that all things you do work together for the good of all those around you. So that from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed you are inconstant contact with Him so that he can guide you, comfort you, and give you the strength needed to thrive in this world, not just survive.


FWW:37, commited to reconciling with BH:39, married 7 months

Posts: 24 | Registered: May 2014 | From: York, PA
20WrongsVs1
♀ Member
Member # 39000
Default  Posted: 3:22 PM, May 18th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The God that says, go ahead and let your husband fuck other women if that's what he needs to heal.

Seriously, good luck, I hope it works out for you two.


fWW: 42
BH: 52
DDay: April 21, 2013
Sweet DS & fierce DD, under 10
"Between stimulus and response there’s a space, in that space lies our power to choose our response, in our response lies our growth and our freedom." V. Frankl

Posts: 1236 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Redneck land
sunnyrain
♀ Member
Member # 30164
Default  Posted: 6:26 PM, May 18th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Attempting to look at this with an open mind and without judgment, but wondering why the MC would suggest an EA with a friend as a better alternative to a ONS? How is an EA a better situation to deal with than a ONS? An EA takes time to develop. You just don't go out and get one.

Frankly, I think an EA is riskier and has the potential to create more of a problem in the M (most EA will eventually turn into PA). If evening the score has to be done in order for the M to survive, I'd rather my H hired a prostitute and just got it done and over. But that's just me.

As to poor communication skills making you and your M vulnerable to an affair, I hear you. I think it's great that you recognize the fact that you need help in this area of your M. Recognizing what made you vulnerable in the first place, and correcting these things, will go a long way in helping you remain true to yourself as well as your M.

[This message edited by sunnyrain at 6:27 PM, May 18th (Sunday)]


"I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne."

Posts: 450 | Registered: Nov 2010
Trying2LoveAgain
♀ Member
Member # 43024
Default  Posted: 6:36 PM, May 18th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have to agree with Ms.Panda and Aubrie...I do agree that God intends for marriages to work and people to forgive and stay together if at all possible. However, the work IS up to us! You cannot shift blame and expect that will work..Best of luck!


Me:BS
Him:FWH
2 DS:35 & 30 , 2 D Grandchildren
"Oh the webs we weave, when first we practice to deceive"....My WH quotes this often.
I found out about H's affair 25 yrs later.Mine is my own "Life is a journey, travel with Care."

Posts: 293 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: New Mexico
Fallen
♀ Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 7:25 PM, May 18th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The God I know commanded us not to commit adultery. I had a massive fail on that one and estranged myself from God in the effort. While I believe that I am forgiven for what I did, I don't for a moment think that God's instruction to us in the Ten Commandments meant "Thou shalt not commit adultery. (Unless thy spouse committeth adultery first. If thy spouse first committeth adultery, then shalt thou get a free pass.) If you really believe the scriptural description of God you'll know there is no grey area here.

Thou shalt NOT.


You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23488 | Registered: May 2004
Fallen
♀ Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 8:35 PM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Emaline, been thinking of you and hoping that you're still reading.


You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23488 | Registered: May 2004
Topic Posts: 27
Pages: 1 · 2

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