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User Topic: woman at the gym, wwyd?
idkam
♀ Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 7:17 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Here we go again, catty ladies at the gym.

So here goes.

So there's this lady at the gym who I would talk to from time to time who is a gossiper. (Is that a word?)So there are times that I just speak and keep going. When I go to the gym I go there to workout not hang around for 45 minutes talking about people in the gym or talking about work. BORING!

A few weeks ago I go to spin class and I speak to her and she just looks at me and turns her head. OOOOKKKK, no big deal. Then a few weeks later I was in Yoga class and she walks in and doesn't speak and I don't say anything because I think oh well maybe she didn't see me. After class I gather my things and leave and I don't say anything to her because I'm feeling like she is intentionally not speaking.

On Saturday I'm headed to the spin class and she is walking towards me and I smile and say hi and she made a ugly face and turned her head
I'm shocked and now I'm thinking what the hell is her problem?

So how would you handle this? Do I ignore her (I'm very good at ignoring people) or do I ask her what's going on? If I did ask doesn't it look like she's gotten to me? Or should I let it pass for a while and see what happens. IDK

If I had a problem with someone or if someone rubbed me the wrong way I would let the person know, in a nice way of course.

So what say you?


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1801 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
MovingUpward
♂ Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 7:23 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh I think I would keep being friendly because it's driving her a little nuts.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 52596 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
k94ever
♀ Member
Member # 11176
Default  Posted: 7:25 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Be polite, but don't give her any more space in your head. You guys will never be buddies and leave it at that.


k9


BS: 56
WS: 53
Betrayed: 23 years
Affairs: 14 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

Posts: 6580 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: Wisconsin
idkam
♀ Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 7:31 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thx for your replies.
So I should continue speaking to her even though she doesn't speak. I see her every time I go to the gym. She's in her 50's for crying out loud, she needs to get over it. What ever it is.


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1801 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
jrc1963
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Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 7:36 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How do you know this woman outside of seeing her at the gym??


Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24595 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
metamorphisis
♀ Administrator
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 7:39 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd let it go. That's the thing about those gossipy catty people. Eventually you become the target. Whenever I hear someone talking horribly about someone I always think "Hmm.. wonder what you say about me". So apparently it's your turn to be on her shit list. She needs to grow up.. and probably won't. I'd be cordial and file it under "Who the heck cares".



“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.”... Anais Nin

Posts: 44952 | Registered: Sep 2006
dameia
♀ Member
Member # 36072
Default  Posted: 7:41 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My DD12's fifth grade teacher HATES me. This isn't the time to get into why, but he's an asshole. Unfortunately I see him around a lot (even though DD is no longer in fifth grade). He likes to glare, turn his nose up, etc.

In response, I smile very big, wave, and say in a perky voice "Hi Mr. A-hole!" It drives him crazy.

So I agree with Moo.


Me: BS
D-Day: 7/7/12

Trust is like paper. Once it's crumpled it can never be perfect again.


Posts: 1168 | Registered: Jul 2012
LA44
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Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 7:47 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Honestly, I wouldn't give her the time of day from here on out, esp. if you don't know her outside of the gym. AND, if she is a gossiper, good riddance!


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2443 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
Kajem
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Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 10:00 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Smile, wave, say hi and keep going. It will drive her nucking futs!

Good luck! It's hard to be rejected like that, I'm sorry.

K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5264 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
ThoughtIKnewYa
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Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 10:21 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do you really care what she thinks or why? Personally, I wouldn't. Just do your thing and don't worry about her.

Posts: 11743 | Registered: Mar 2008
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 10:27 PM, May 12th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do you go to the gym for social interaction, to work out, or both?

I ask that question in all seriousness - because not everyone has the same motivation in something like going to the gym, and what your motivation is will affect how you would best respond.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13798 | Registered: Jul 2011
idkam
♀ Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 7:17 AM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks my friends..

To answer a few questions..i go to the gym to workout, granted when I'm waiting for a class to start i may strike up a conversation with someone and to be fair when i first met this lady we would talk when i was going to yoga regularly... I've shared some things about my fathers death, his will and my step mother...all of this was last year some time....

.i love to people watch when I'm on the treadmill, elliptical or stair master and i noticed there's one girl she'll talk too for 30 plus mins....maybe she's upset because i haven't "talked" to her in a long time...

We've never spent any time outside the gym so i wouldn't consider her a good friend....

So i guess i shouldn't go out of my way to speak but if we are in close proximity i should smile and say hi, right?

Not sure why I'm giving this issue so head space...


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1801 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
tushnurse
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Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 7:59 AM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would encourage you to take the high road on this, and be your normal self, friendly, kind. If she wants to be a raging bitch let her.
At 50 she isn't going to change who she is, and probably 30+ years ago she was the mean girl at high school, and never evolved to a higher being.

Let it roll off you, her loss.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8705 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
itainteasy
♀ Member
Member # 31094
Default  Posted: 8:18 AM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I wouldn't give two shits what her problem is.

I'd probably laugh at her when she made faces at me.

Maybe I'd start quoting "Mean Girls". "On Wednesdays, we wear pink!"


I have no time for that kind of shit.


Posts: 3419 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: NWPA
idkam
♀ Member
Member # 18375
Default  Posted: 8:33 AM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks tush good point...


People come into your life for a Reason, Season or a Lifetime..
Divorced

Posts: 1801 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Texas
Topic Posts: 15

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