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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: xwh and the Mother's Day videos
sparkysable
♀ Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 12:43 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

On Mother's Day, my ex sends me a text saying to check my email for a video from DD.

Sounds cute, right? And for a moment I thought, how nice. Maybe he actually is human.

However, that moment left me, and I realized that I dare not open this video on my home computer, lest it contain a virus, keylogger, or something similar. So I opened it at the public library computer . I'm pretty sure it was just a legitimate video with no virus attached.

In the video, my daughter says "Happy Mother's Day Mommy, I love you." However, she looked very confused, and her words were forced. *sigh*

So I ask her about it, I tell her I got her video that xwh sent me, and she tells me that he had her make a video for me, for OW, and for OW's mother.

OW is not her mother, and OW's mother is not her grandmother! So if he's feeling like spreading the Mother's Day cheer, he could have made a video for HIS OWN MOTHER, who actually IS DD's grandmother! But no! He must impress the OW and OW's parents at all costs, using DD as his little showpiece.

It just makes me mad. And I know there's nothing I can do about it. He can do what he wants when DD is in his care, I just hate the fantasyland unicorn show.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3488 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
deena
♀ Member
Member # 27275
Default  Posted: 12:48 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Using the kids is just not right!!!! grrrrrrr


Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's
better to leave them broken than to hurt
yourself putting it back together.


Posts: 3138 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Canada
peridot
♀ Member
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 12:55 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow!!!


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4801 | Registered: Feb 2008
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 2:12 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ugh! That is so wrong!

It's funny how these douchebags think that forcing the issue-- your new cheater stepmommy is now a mommy in your life, and you're going to treat her that way-- is going to make the kids more accepting of the Owives. Don't they realize that the more they force the issue, the more likely they are going to drive a wedge between themselves and their children?

But, maybe that just doesn't matter to them. Children are merely decorations that they use to dress up their lives and flatter themselves into thinking that they're good parents and good people. That's certainly demonstrated when the kids become teenagers, push back, and are then rejected by the cheater parents. How many BSs do we see on this site dealing with that-- XWSs who want nothing more to do with the kids when the kids are old enough to voice their own opinions and have a say in where they live and whom they spend time with?

Look at the silver lining-- at least he had her make you one. At least he acknowledged your existence. Mine didn't even bother with that.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3643 | Registered: Oct 2011
sparkysable
♀ Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 2:56 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Look at the silver lining-- at least he had her make you one. At least he acknowledged your existence. Mine didn't even bother with that.
I suppose you are right.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3488 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 7:36 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Your poor DD. I think it's awful he forced her to make one for anyone - even for you.

There's a way to capture these moments at the right time and in the right way. Forcing them to perform like circus monkeys is just awful. Doubly so when it is for OW and OWs mum.

Yuck. Just yuck.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5658 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
LifeIsBroken
♀ Member
Member # 27071
Default  Posted: 8:01 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Why did your x have your daughter on Mother's Day ? Seems like that would be yours. Do you keep her on Father's Day?


BW: 59
XH: 60
Married 34 yrs, LIBerated: 2/17/11
MOW: 50 (she said she wanted a sugar daddy; xh said, "I'M HIM!")
Actions ALWAYS have consequences. Too bad cheaters don't consider the consequences BEFORE they create so much damage.

Posts: 527 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Missouri & Massachusetts
Kajem
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 8:39 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She's a prop for his life, it's center stage everyone is watching him.

I'm sorry she was put thru that debaucle. Hoping she finds her voice soon!

Hugs,
K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5538 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Linus1968
♂ Member
Member # 31243
Default  Posted: 8:43 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ugh!!! I can't stand stories of the WS trying to make life all happy dory when involving the OP. Why force it?

I feel bad for DD. It must have been weird for her when she said it was for the OW and her mom.

Why did he have her on Mother's Day?

You're an interesting species, an interesting mix. You're capable of such beautiful dreams and such horrible nightmares. You feel so lost, so cut off, so alone, only you're not. See, in all our searching, the only thing we've found that makes the emptiness bearable is each other. - Contact


Me: Me
Her: Multiple men, multiple times, OC with the latest one
S: 16, D:14
May 27, 2014 DIVORCED!!!
In the words of Dory "Whew, I'm glad I got that off my chest."

Posts: 241 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Florida
tesla
♀ Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think it's strange that he made one for you. I mean, I get it if the kid is begging for her dad to record her and send you a message...but you would be able to tell that difference.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4737 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
sparkysable
♀ Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 10:50 PM, May 13th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She WAS with me on mother's day. I realize now that the way I wrote that sounded like she wasn't with me. He recorded it previously and then sent it on mother's day.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3488 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
thebighurt
♀ Member
Member # 34722
Default  Posted: 12:09 AM, May 14th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a pos! Poor DD would definitely be confused by having to perform for people who really don't mean anything near the context of her message to you. I have to agree with TA74 that at least he did include you in the messages unlike her xpos.


Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

Posts: 2470 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: the Other Side
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 1:05 PM, May 14th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This really pisses me off.

But I guess it isn't entirely surprising. To these kind of cheaters we are interchangeable. We are just parts. Get tired of one, swap it out for another. They do not see us as human beings with inherent value & worth. So sure. Force your precious child to lie on camera and make Mother's Day videos for women who are not the actual mother or grandmother. Make carbon copy videos. Because we're all just female gender parts. Not unique. Not important. No difference.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

Posts: 10026 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
sparkysable
♀ Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 10:22 AM, May 15th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

But I guess it isn't entirely surprising. To these kind of cheaters we are interchangeable. We are just parts. Get tired of one, swap it out for another. They do not see us as human beings with inherent value & worth. So sure. Force your precious child to lie on camera and make Mother's Day videos for women who are not the actual mother or grandmother. Make carbon copy videos. Because we're all just female gender parts. Not unique. Not important. No difference.

AMEN Nature Girl!

Forcing them to perform like circus monkeys is just awful.
SBB this is what I am the most pissed about. She's not his little circus monkey-isn't-she-cute-ego-kibbles-ego-kibbles plaything.

But really, I should just let him hang himself. My DD is not stupid, and she will see through his snake-charming one day.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3488 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
Topic Posts: 14

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