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User Topic: Respect
♀ Member
Member # 39803
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, May 18th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My H takes responsibility for his affair, and reports to be grateful that I am still around. He also says the person he showed the least respect for during the affair was himself.

He did not treat me with respect during the affair, but I think actually has greater respect for me now than he ever has, because reconciliation is some seriously hard stuff!

me - BS (40s)
DDay - June 2013, A was 2+ months, EA then PA
In MC & Reconciling
An affair is a personal crisis, not a relationship.

I edit, therefore I am.

Posts: 2058 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
trying to smile
♀ Member
Member # 9683
Default  Posted: 4:45 AM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

respecting yourself is what ultimately matters.

9 years later and I still sometimes struggle with this.

Good Women.
May we know them,
May we be them,
May we raise them.
Do, or do not. There is no try.

Posts: 6184 | Registered: Feb 2006 | From: The Land Down Under
♀ Member
Member # 30213
Default  Posted: 5:23 AM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think a BS always has that question lurking...if someone had asked "What would you do if you caught your H cheating?," before the A, most of us would have said that the M would be over, yet here we are. I don't think my H will ever understand why I stayed...during the worst fog of the A, after he and OW "mutually" decided to not have contact anymore, he told me I had "won"....yea, I know...won what??? Sometimes I am not sure if that is still in his head. Other times, I think he realizes he won and dodged a bullet by not ending up more involved with her.

My youngest, a teen at the time, was a factor in me staying then...that and the fact that I really didn't see my 35 year relationship with a man I truly loved being over. In my mind, I respect me for doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks.

When I asked him, what if it had been the other way around, he said he wouldn't want to know...that explains a lot.

Posts: 600 | Registered: Nov 2010
Topic Posts: 23
Pages: 1 · 2

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