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User Topic: Family of origin
Actionsoverwords
♂ Member
Member # 41949
Default  Posted: 8:24 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good evening, everyone,

I post to SI and two other forums and I wasn't sure where to post this so I figure I would start here. As an SAWH, the things that I have done to hurt my BW and DS have all been my own, but I continually looked for someone and something else to blame. For a number of years I have told myself that because of my upbringing and FOO issues (physical, mental, sexual abuse, my mother didn't believe me about said abuse, I was never told who my father was, etc.), I cheat, lie, and objectify women. The truth is that many people suffered far worse then I ever did and they never turned around and became the abuser.

I apologize for going all over the place. It has been a confusing few days as I am attempting to process a few things.

This past week, I've disclosed to a family member, via email, that I have been separated from my BW and DS for the last two months. In addition, I told her that I was physically and sexually abused by my step father. Up until then, besides my therapist and the folks in my recovery circle, no one close to me knew of my separation and abuse. I told her that I wanted to know about my mother, my father, and just general FOO stuff. She said to give her a call, but I was feeling overwhelmed and just delayed calling her. Every time I think about this scenario of getting answers, I feel despondent and just play out the worse case scenario in my head. In this case, I began feeling manic and again felt a lot of pain and just suicidal again.

Eventually, she called me to tell me that she was not going to tell my mother or my step father what I disclosed to her, but she forwarded my email to other family members who might be able to help with some of my questions. She said everyone would like to meet with me and during that meeting, any questions I have would be answered.

Without going into the whole thing, they did answer all of my questions and it confirmed things that I already suspected. It was also the first time that I've disclosed my serial cheating and use of prostitutes to family (with the exclusion of my mother and half sister) I left that meeting feeling less angry towards my mother than I have been and actually feeling sorry for her. Since the meeting, I have been going through an emotional roller coaster trying to process everything.

Right now I am just feeling extremely sad. I've treated my mother like crap and resented her for nearly all of my life for "allowing" things to happen to me. I look at my son and I just think to myself, "How could someone allow terrible things to happen to someone who is so little?" I can't say I forgive my mom for the choices that she has made right now, but I can empathize and sympathize more. Furthermore, I am just incredulous that I have let this secret of mine and my refusal to deal with it cripple my life and damage the relationships that supposedly mean something to me.

I love my BW and DS. I long for the true intimacy that I never shared with my BW because of my choices. I don't know if we are going to make it, but I am hoping that whatever our relationship ends up being, my anger, resentment, hate, and general nastiness dissipates so that we can have a genuine relationship of some sort. I am hoping that I am at least headed in the right direction.

For members here who have had to deal with FOO issues, did you find that things in general get better after you tackled said issues?

[This message edited by Actionsoverwords at 8:27 PM, May 20th (Tuesday)]


Me: WH, 30's
Her : BW, 30's, (determinata)
Children: An amazing son.
I am a sex addict, working on myself, and facing the wreckage of my actions.



Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
ThatGuyNoMore
♂ Member
Member # 42899
Default  Posted: 9:28 PM, May 20th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am just beginning to address my own FOO issues (alcoholism, emotional abuse), which I should have done years ago but swept under the rug. I'm reading "Daring Greatly" by Brené Brown, which has taught me a lot about my issues with vulnerability: growing up in an unstable, unsafe home often leads to trust issues, and control issues, fear leading to anger, bullying, acting out in a myriad of ways. A couple of weeks ago, I had a good cry in the arms of my BS who said what she heard was the voice of a broken 10 yr old boy. That's exactly how I felt. I'm in IC, and those discussions have been quite helpful. I am eager to talk to my older sister to get her perspective. She is the only family member whom I've told of my A.

Good luck to you, Actionsoverwords. Addressing your FOO issues constructively and honestly I'm certain will bring clarity to your situation and help you to heal.


me 48
BS 47
Married 22 years, 4 kids
D-Day 3/5/14
I lied to everyone, including myself.

Posts: 161 | Registered: Mar 2014 | From: US
Matilda23
♀ Member
Member # 42807
Default  Posted: 12:58 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Actionsoverwords))))

I can see you are having a hard day. I don't know if they get better as I am tackling these issues myself, but I wanted to let you know you have been heard. I don't know if this is even right, but I work with one issue at a time to fully understand it and it may help you understand another issue. I think that if you do tackle these issues, it will help you heal into the person your wife saw you as and married you for. Good luck and keep pushing forward.


WGF - 24
BBF - MercilesslyNuked, 29
DDay 1 - 1/6/14
DDay 2 - 1/23/14

I Am Strong! I Am Beautiful! I Am Smart! I Am Worthy!


Posts: 121 | Registered: Mar 2014 | From: Colorado
IntoTheLight
♀ Member
Member # 42957
Default  Posted: 10:17 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am a WW and have finally been able to get to the root of the "why" of my affair. I had so many unresolved issues with my FOO that I swept under the rug when I moved out of the house. I pretended everything was ok and patted myself on the back for "getting out" and making a beautiful life for myself. I was really prideful, actually, and had no idea I was capable of an affair. I just buried everything and it all blew up when AP came along.

The truth is that many people suffered far worse then I ever did and they never turned around and became the abuser.

This is what is KILLING me about myself right now. I have always felt damaged but now I feel damaged and toxic. BH has taken me back- he is being so wonderful and it's really confusing. Sometimes I wish he would leave and find someone better- anyone would be. He is probably still in denial and it's scary.

I have no advice since I'm an absolute mess right now. I wish you a lot of peace and healing.


WW-Me
BS-Him
Reconciling after confessing LTA

Posts: 67 | Registered: Mar 2014
splitintwo
♀ Member
Member # 42951
Default  Posted: 10:28 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This:

I have always felt damaged but now I feel damaged and toxic.

Truth.


BH: 42
WW: 37
LTA ended Jan. 1, 2014; NC started in April.
Married 17 years.
No DDay; this, like all of life's decisions, is a work in progress.

My best thinking brought me to SI.


Posts: 213 | Registered: Mar 2014
tired girl
♀ Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 10:48 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have always felt damaged but now I feel damaged and toxic

I went through a fairly long period where I felt like this. Right now I feel like I am on my last step of putting a lot of my FOO issues, at least the major ones to bed. I am in more of a space now where I accept some of the issues that come with the territory of what happened in my childhood. I accept who I am. And I have had very honest discussions with HL that I may never get to a place with certain issues, and I am ok if that is a problem for him. It might be a problem for me if the shoe was on the other foot. I had no choice in what was done to me as a child, and it molded me into who I am today. I learned not to trust people as far back as 2 yrs old. That is the earliest incident I have of me already being independent of anyone and taking care of myself. I had already learned that people could not be trusted. This is not something that I am going to overcome with therapy.

Many of my other issues have been worked through and are much better. I am much more open, calmer, less defensive, willing to listen. There is a difference in how I live now. I am hoping that after this last step is done, there will be even better changes.

Working through FOO issues can be long road, I believe that it is the ticket to changing your life, for the long haul. I tried to ignore it for 40 years. It didn't work in the end.


Me45 Him 45 Hardlessons DS 25,23,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

Posts: 4859 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
MissesJai
♀ Member
Member # 24849
Default  Posted: 10:53 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In short, yes, I do feel better when I tackle those FOO issues head on, instead of running from them. I started EMDR therapy and as a result, we're digging deeper into FOO and it's been painful but honestly, it feels as if a weight is starting to lift.


FWW - 41
Fawk you.....pay me!

Posts: 5899 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: So Cal.....
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 11:06 AM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

For members here who have had to deal with FOO issues, did you find that things in general get better after you tackled said issues?
(Speaking generally) Whats the other option? Know there is an issue(s), pretending there isn't, and whistle thru the graveyard? How is that working out so far for you? Do you feel better for it? Does knowing there's drama and hurt, and suppressing it down and pretending you are "better" for it actually feel right? Does it feel authentic? Is the fantasy worth the discord in your soul?

I was under the illusion that I had the perfect FOO. Yeah. Right. People kept picking at scabs. Forcing me to open my eyes and look. And yes. It hurt like a beast. Still does. But you know what? I sleep better at night. Things make sense. The rose colored lenses are off and I can see clearly for oh, the first time ever. My FOO is not perfect. By any stretch of the imagination. And forcing myself to look at that has also forced me to make changes. Which ironically, were for the better. As bad as it hurts to dig and sift thru this junk, there is still healing and peace. And I'll take that any day over the old stuff.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6227 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
Wayflost
♀ Member
Member # 41583
Default  Posted: 12:19 PM, May 21st (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Actions - congratulations on being brave and doing something scary.

As others have said, I too thought my FOO was good. Not perfect, but certainly better than most. I would be the first to tell you that I had a happy child hood. Turns out, I have all kinds of skeletons in my FOO closet.

Hang in there.

The truth is that many people suffered far worse then I ever did and they never turned around and became the abuser.

True. But on the other hand there are people who've been through less who did as well. At least, that's what I've been told. Keep doing the work to heal yourself.


Me: WW
Him: BH (totalheartbreak)
Both: 30s

Appalled by my actions, and the choice to set off several atomic bombs in my life.


Posts: 391 | Registered: Dec 2013
Actionsoverwords
♂ Member
Member # 41949
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, May 27th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am just beginning to address my own FOO issues (alcoholism, emotional abuse), which I should have done years ago but swept under the rug. I'm reading "Daring Greatly" by Brené Brown, which has taught me a lot about my issues with vulnerability: growing up in an unstable, unsafe home often leads to trust issues, and control issues, fear leading to anger, bullying, acting out in a myriad of ways. A couple of weeks ago, I had a good cry in the arms of my BS who said what she heard was the voice of a broken 10 yr old boy. That's exactly how I felt. I'm in IC, and those discussions have been quite helpful. I am eager to talk to my older sister to get her perspective. She is the only family member whom I've told of my A.

TGNM, I will check out Daring Greatly when I can. The issues that you mentioned are definitely traits that I exhibit. Part of me feels so stupid because I feel that I should be over all of this, but the fact that everything has had such a hold on my life tells me that it is something that has to be dealt with.

I can see you are having a hard day. I don't know if they get better as I am tackling these issues myself, but I wanted to let you know you have been heard. I don't know if this is even right, but I work with one issue at a time to fully understand it and it may help you understand another issue. I think that if you do tackle these issues, it will help you heal into the person your wife saw you as and married you for. Good luck and keep pushing forward.

Matilda23, Thanks for the kind words. I wish you the best in your journey in dealing with these issues as well. My BW has told me on a number of occasions that she sees the potential in me and I only hope that I can live up to that.

I am a WW and have finally been able to get to the root of the "why" of my affair. I had so many unresolved issues with my FOO that I swept under the rug when I moved out of the house. I pretended everything was ok and patted myself on the back for "getting out" and making a beautiful life for myself. I was really prideful, actually, and had no idea I was capable of an affair. I just buried everything and it all blew up when AP came along.

This is what is KILLING me about myself right now. I have always felt damaged but now I feel damaged and toxic. BH has taken me back- he is being so wonderful and it's really confusing. Sometimes I wish he would leave and find someone better- anyone would be. He is probably still in denial and it's scary.

IntoTheLight, During my first separation, I pretended like everything was okay all the way up to my current separation. I lied to myself and my BW saying that I had my issues under control. I can relate to what you are dealing with on a number of levels. That feeling of inadequacy is something I think all waywards possess. Hang in there.

I went through a fairly long period where I felt like this. Right now I feel like I am on my last step of putting a lot of my FOO issues, at least the major ones to bed. I am in more of a space now where I accept some of the issues that come with the territory of what happened in my childhood. I accept who I am. And I have had very honest discussions with HL that I may never get to a place with certain issues, and I am ok if that is a problem for him. It might be a problem for me if the shoe was on the other foot. I had no choice in what was done to me as a child, and it molded me into who I am today. I learned not to trust people as far back as 2 yrs old. That is the earliest incident I have of me already being independent of anyone and taking care of myself. I had already learned that people could not be trusted. This is not something that I am going to overcome with therapy.

Many of my other issues have been worked through and are much better. I am much more open, calmer, less defensive, willing to listen. There is a difference in how I live now. I am hoping that after this last step is done, there will be even better changes.

Working through FOO issues can be long road, I believe that it is the ticket to changing your life, for the long haul. I tried to ignore it for 40 years. It didn't work in the end.

tired girl,Thank you for sharing your experiences. I have been ignoring these issues for a number of years and the time is now to deal with FOO issues.

In short, yes, I do feel better when I tackle those FOO issues head on, instead of running from them. I started EMDR therapy and as a result, we're digging deeper into FOO and it's been painful but honestly, it feels as if a weight is starting to lift.

MissesJai, I see EMDR mentioned a lot here on SI. Would you be able to fill me in on how it works? Even after reading a number of webpages on the topic, I am still unclear.

(Speaking generally) Whats the other option? Know there is an issue(s), pretending there isn't, and whistle thru the graveyard? How is that working out so far for you? Do you feel better for it? Does knowing there's drama and hurt, and suppressing it down and pretending you are "better" for it actually feel right? Does it feel authentic? Is the fantasy worth the discord in your soul?
I was under the illusion that I had the perfect FOO. Yeah. Right. People kept picking at scabs. Forcing me to open my eyes and look. And yes. It hurt like a beast. Still does. But you know what? I sleep better at night. Things make sense. The rose colored lenses are off and I can see clearly for oh, the first time ever. My FOO is not perfect. By any stretch of the imagination. And forcing myself to look at that has also forced me to make changes. Which ironically, were for the better. As bad as it hurts to dig and sift thru this junk, there is still healing and peace. And I'll take that any day over the old stuff.

Aubrie, You are right. Delaying things have always brought on more anxiety for me and have always give me another reason to not deal with something. Healing and peace are things that I hope to attain in this life time.

Actions - congratulations on being brave and doing something scary.
As others have said, I too thought my FOO was good. Not perfect, but certainly better than most. I would be the first to tell you that I had a happy child hood. Turns out, I have all kinds of skeletons in my FOO closet.

Hang in there.

The truth is that many people suffered far worse then I ever did and they never turned around and became the abuser.
True. But on the other hand there are people who've been through less who did as well. At least, that's what I've been told. Keep doing the work to heal yourself

.

Wayflost, I've always assumed that folks with happy childhoods were better off then me, but the truth is if one's family is dysfunctional, it sets the child up for dysfunction as well.


Me: WH, 30's
Her : BW, 30's, (determinata)
Children: An amazing son.
I am a sex addict, working on myself, and facing the wreckage of my actions.



Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
Actionsoverwords
♂ Member
Member # 41949
Default  Posted: 9:41 PM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Planning on speaking to my mother this weekend about her role in allowing the many abuses to happen. From there, I hope to confront my abuser.

I never thought I would be in this place.


Me: WH, 30's
Her : BW, 30's, (determinata)
Children: An amazing son.
I am a sex addict, working on myself, and facing the wreckage of my actions.



Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
sadone29
♀ Member
Member # 38597
Default  Posted: 8:18 AM, May 29th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Actions, "I never thought I'd be in this place," is something I've recently said too.

I remember my IC saying that one day I might very well confront my own parents. I told him that there's no way I could every do that. I still don't feel ready, but I'm starting to see that I might be one day.

I hope it's okay to say that your recent posts show growth, which always means a willingness to face our own massive pain.

I wish you strength for this weekend.


DDay Feb. 28, 2013
5 year long EA (still believe PA), webcam girls, contacting hookers
Preparing for D

Posts: 707 | Registered: Mar 2013
KBeguile
♂ Member
Member # 38348
Default  Posted: 1:07 PM, May 29th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Before all of this, I was subconsciously aware that I was damaged. IC correctly pointed out that I have always been something of a public figure in my own life - expected to perform a certain way on-stage for family and friends, while hiding the damage I knew (but wasn't perceptibly aware) I carried.

Now, I am aware of my damage. Rather than making me necessarily toxic, I think that it gives me a chance to actually repair the damage that I know is there: confront FOO issues, etc.

It's the difference between ignoring the "Check Engine Light" for years because nothing "seems wrong" with the car and finally taking the car in to get diagnosed.

I'd rather live with the knowledge and take the time to fix it than limp along blindly wondering ... THAT would make me damaged-and-toxic.


Me: fWS 32
Her: BS 35 (HeartInADustpan)
DS: 4yo
M: 7 years
DDays: 2012/11/14, 2013/02/05, 2013/03/09
-
"Everything that happens now is happening 'now.'"
"What happened to 'then'?"
"We passed 'then.'"

Posts: 797 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: St. Louis
Actionsoverwords
♂ Member
Member # 41949
Default  Posted: 9:04 PM, May 29th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Actions, "I never thought I'd be in this place," is something I've recently said too.
I remember my IC saying that one day I might very well confront my own parents. I told him that there's no way I could every do that. I still don't feel ready, but I'm starting to see that I might be one day.

I hope it's okay to say that your recent posts show growth, which always means a willingness to face our own massive pain.

I wish you strength for this weekend.

sadone29,

I am sending good thoughts and strength your way. Thank you for the kind words, I am happy for you that you are able to see that you have the courage to face your parents.

Before all of this, I was subconsciously aware that I was damaged. IC correctly pointed out that I have always been something of a public figure in my own life - expected to perform a certain way on-stage for family and friends, while hiding the damage I knew (but wasn't perceptibly aware) I carried.
Now, I am aware of my damage. Rather than making me necessarily toxic, I think that it gives me a chance to actually repair the damage that I know is there: confront FOO issues, etc.

It's the difference between ignoring the "Check Engine Light" for years because nothing "seems wrong" with the car and finally taking the car in to get diagnosed.

I'd rather live with the knowledge and take the time to fix it than limp along blindly wondering ... THAT would make me damaged-and-toxic.

Kbeguile,

It's taken me years and a lot of people guiding and pushing me gently along the way. I did not arrive here on my own volition, but rather, I was dragged here kicking and screaming.

Limping along blindly...that was me. I have some sense of what happened and it is up to me, no one else, to do the work to heal.


Me: WH, 30's
Her : BW, 30's, (determinata)
Children: An amazing son.
I am a sex addict, working on myself, and facing the wreckage of my actions.



Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
Actionsoverwords
♂ Member
Member # 41949
Default  Posted: 6:41 PM, May 31st (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just checking in, everyone. I am supposed to meet my mother tomorrow and I have been working on my SA recovery persistently the last two days. I've attended 4 meetings, made numerous outreach calls, texts, and emails, did hours of reading on addiction, and am essentially stopping only to eat and use the bathroom or take care of some household task. I took a brief break yesterday to watch a movie and zone out, but it was right back at it afterwards.

One of the things that I have been working on is my entire sexual history. This is tough and mentally draining. Seeing all of the dirt that I have done in black and white is leaving me feeling like WTF is wrong with me. I am also seeing some of the effects that drugs and alcohol and other addictions have really done to my life and to quote a line out of the big book, I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I just needed to get that out there. Thanks to everyone here on SI for giving me a safe venue to vent.


Me: WH, 30's
Her : BW, 30's, (determinata)
Children: An amazing son.
I am a sex addict, working on myself, and facing the wreckage of my actions.



Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
sadone29
♀ Member
Member # 38597
Default  Posted: 10:56 AM, June 2nd (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Did you go through with it? If you did, I hope it went well. I hope you come back and let us know. Especially if your emotions are everywhere and you need help.

wanted to add: just finished my first step regarding alcoholism. I get how difficult it is to go back and look at it all. It's draining. I wanted to keep everything back in the past. But I'm also tired of being sick, and willing to do anything at this point.

[This message edited by sadone29 at 10:59 AM, June 2nd (Monday)]


DDay Feb. 28, 2013
5 year long EA (still believe PA), webcam girls, contacting hookers
Preparing for D

Posts: 707 | Registered: Mar 2013
Actionsoverwords
♂ Member
Member # 41949
Default  Posted: 2:06 PM, June 2nd (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi sadone,

I met with my mother this weekend and needed a day to figure out where I am. Having had a day to let it sink in, I can say that the meeting was both disappointing and everything I expected it to be if that makes any sense.

She acknowledged the hurt that she has caused me and apologized. In the same breath she told me that my step-father was a good man who is a bit crazy. I was kind of shocked that she would say that about him. She asked if we could start over and I told her we can, but I also told her that her husband will cannot be alone with my son, ever.

I will say that my anger has subsided tremendously. It is still there, but it does feel as if a weight has lifted from my chest. I half expected her to deny that anything ever happened and for her to call me a liar, but I know that I cannot control any one else's behavior.

I am happy for you that you finished your first step regarding your alcohol addiction, good work! Keep on fighting!


Me: WH, 30's
Her : BW, 30's, (determinata)
Children: An amazing son.
I am a sex addict, working on myself, and facing the wreckage of my actions.



Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
sadone29
♀ Member
Member # 38597
Default  Posted: 11:47 AM, June 3rd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations with confronting her! I'm glad she tried to face the truth too. I'm glad some of the weight has lifted.


DDay Feb. 28, 2013
5 year long EA (still believe PA), webcam girls, contacting hookers
Preparing for D

Posts: 707 | Registered: Mar 2013
Actionsoverwords
♂ Member
Member # 41949
Default  Posted: 8:33 PM, June 3rd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I reflected a bit on my family of origin issues today and realized a few things.

I felt that my FOO issues have left me always fearing abandonment and thinking that my needs will never get met so I should meet them myself. In trying to recover from my SA and engaging in recovery writing and reading, I feel like the biggest jack-ass. I've told myself all of these lies and conceived of all of these outcomes to things in my head that I couldn't even see the truth.

All of the things that were done to me, I am doing to my BW and DS. I am so self-centered and narcissistic that I neglected their well-being and sanity that I always fell back on, "You don't understand what I am going through."

It seems obvious, but it wasn't to me, or at least I didn't really think on it.


Me: WH, 30's
Her : BW, 30's, (determinata)
Children: An amazing son.
I am a sex addict, working on myself, and facing the wreckage of my actions.



Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
wishicouldredo
♀ New Member
Member # 43623
Default  Posted: 9:32 AM, June 4th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've told myself all of these lies and conceived of all of these outcomes to things in my head that I couldn't even see the truth.

All of the things that were done to me, I am doing to my BW and DS. I am so self-centered and narcissistic that I neglected their well-being and sanity that I always fell back on, "You don't understand what I am going through."

Lots of progress, Actions. I am sorry your meeting with your mother was disappointing, but you realize you cannot control her thoughts or actions. It is a long road, but you are getting there. Would you consider IC or 12 step again going in vulnerable and ready to work?


"I'm not where I need to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be."

"Feelings are just visitors, let them come and go." - Mooji


Posts: 40 | Registered: Jun 2014
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