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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Interrogatories and such
Mom4ever
♀ Member
Member # 40516
Frustrated  Posted: 6:35 AM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am pretty discouraged. Almost a year out from DDay and filing for D. We've had about 5 or so court dates involving different aspects of this. Now ordered to mediation which I had already offered to do. STBXWH has now apparently fired his lawyer and hired another one. That one filed a motion immediately and we have a hearing next week on that. He's trying to block me from an activity this summer with the kids. Control issues much?? Anyway, if we can't come to an agreement during mediation, we have "another" final court date in late fall.

But now the new attorney has sent me a long list of interrogatories and request for production. This has not been brought up or done by either of us for a year. But now we get to do this when we are going to try and mediate. Stupid things on it like list every person with whom you have interacted with more than a standard greeting and handshake... Every trip you have been on with or without your spouse and the purpose and everyone on it... List every date you have been on... It goes on and on. News flash for him, I'm not dating. I'm still married!

I would like any tips, suggestions, or anything anybody has to offer about this. I have an appointment with my attorney because I think we should send interrogatories and request for production to him too. Why should I have all the fun?


BW - me 43
WH - 45
M - 22.5 yrs
D-Day - 6/13/2013
2 DS and 1 DD
Divorcing
There are some things that "sorry" just doesn't fix... But I never even got a "sorry."

Posts: 94 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Southeast
kg201
♂ Member
Member # 40173
Default  Posted: 7:43 AM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am not a lawyer, but those types of questions seem irrelevant, and I am wondering whether there are limitations on the number or type of interrogatories that can be asked. This document (and it's from CA) seems to indicate that only 35 interrogatories can be asked in their jurisdiction.

http://www.nfsesq.com/resources/ccp-discovery/ccp-interrogatories/#2030.030

You might want to go back to the ones you already answered last year, and maybe you have already reached the limit in the case even if there is a new lawyer. I am also wondering whether those particular questions could be seen as harassing, and irrelevant to the case, and your lawyer could have the court issue an order (and possibly fine for their harassing nature) which allows you not to answer them.

Just some initial thoughts.


Me: BH, 39
Her: WW, 40
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, ongoing
Dday: 7/28/13
Divorcing, 3 children
---------------------------------
"There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity." -S

Posts: 592 | Registered: Aug 2013
Chrysalis123
♀ Member
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 7:51 AM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have an appointment with my attorney because I think we should send interrogatories and request for production to him too. Why should I have all the fun?

This was my thought as well....but I am not a lawyer. I wonder how much in legal fees that will cost you and if it is worth it?


Donít get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well.†

Posts: 2608 | Registered: Jan 2010
Mom4ever
♀ Member
Member # 40516
Default  Posted: 8:29 AM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That's a great point. I will get a price for me issuing theses. I think maybe his new lawyer needs some billable hours... This just feels like we are taking steps backwards instead of moving towards a resolution. We are in a no fault state. Even though I haven't agreed with it the whole time, supposedly it doesn't matter that he slept around and had another life. If it's just a math equation, why can't we just plug on the numbers?

It does feel harassing and argumentative. Oh, I forgot the one asking for me to list each time I have been physically abusive toward him. I have had an order of protection against him for almost a year now and I have pictures of me and my hospital records to back it up.

But if anyone has any suggestions on where I could find a list of interrogatory questions for infidelity and such, that would be great.


BW - me 43
WH - 45
M - 22.5 yrs
D-Day - 6/13/2013
2 DS and 1 DD
Divorcing
There are some things that "sorry" just doesn't fix... But I never even got a "sorry."

Posts: 94 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Southeast
kg201
♂ Member
Member # 40173
Default  Posted: 8:30 AM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I found this.
http://wps.prenhall.com/wps/media/objects/6950/7117692/volume_medialib/Resources/SampleInterrogatories.doc


Me: BH, 39
Her: WW, 40
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, ongoing
Dday: 7/28/13
Divorcing, 3 children
---------------------------------
"There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity." -S

Posts: 592 | Registered: Aug 2013
littlefoggy
♀ Member
Member # 41429
Default  Posted: 9:14 AM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah. Most of mine were responded with "Objection this is harassing lawyer speak lawyer speak lawyer speak"


Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13
Divorcing

Posts: 486 | Registered: Nov 2013
Mom4ever
♀ Member
Member # 40516
Default  Posted: 1:08 PM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for the links, kg201. I will definitely check them out. And I think you are all putting me on the right track. I can see me objecting to each of them before I answer. Thanks for listening. I'm just giving him head space. He is high conflict and this will probably go on for nine and a half more years... My only options are to give up or fight. I can't give up because I have children to take care of. I'm just down right now. I know it will pass. I hate this roller coaster!


BW - me 43
WH - 45
M - 22.5 yrs
D-Day - 6/13/2013
2 DS and 1 DD
Divorcing
There are some things that "sorry" just doesn't fix... But I never even got a "sorry."

Posts: 94 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Southeast
whyohwhyohwhy
♀ Member
Member # 17890
Default  Posted: 7:49 PM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My x's lawyer sent me a 70 page interrogatory. My lawyer said he'd never seen anything like it. And I am by no means rich.....

I was supposed to list my boats, antiques, foreign stocks, precious metals, jewelry, beach houses, art collection, limited partnerships, etc..... it was ludicrous.

I just wrote N/A on most of the questions.


what did I ever do to deserve this?

Me:47 BS
Him: X, 51 PA SA NPD?
2 kids; DD14, DD8 divorced


Posts: 1041 | Registered: Jan 2008 | From: east coast
kg201
♂ Member
Member # 40173
Default  Posted: 7:54 PM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I asked my lawyer about this today. She said that writing "objection" with a legal reason (irrelevant, harassing, nude burden) is a legit way to respond. Check with your lawyer. She also confirmed that there is a set number that can be asked in a case, although an allowance for more can be requested from the court. In my state, MA, it is 30 interrogatories, and that is 30 total whether with one or between two lawyers.


Me: BH, 39
Her: WW, 40
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, ongoing
Dday: 7/28/13
Divorcing, 3 children
---------------------------------
"There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity." -S

Posts: 592 | Registered: Aug 2013
courageous
♀ Member
Member # 34477
Default  Posted: 7:55 PM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Controlling much? Sounds like the new lawyer wants to look like he has power.

There is a limit of questions they can ask you. You can reply that the question is not relevant and is harassment.

Or you could always answer like my exwh did:

The respondent rejections this question because it requests information that is attorney-client privileged.

All I asked was what the names of the people were that he has slept with other than me since we have been married.

Expect that liars lie.


Me: BW (35)
Him: ExWH (31) EA/PA with MOW coworker
Married 9 years, 2 small kids
dday 3/12/2011 divorced fall 2012

My ipad does a lot of crazy typos.


Posts: 620 | Registered: Jan 2012
Mom4ever
♀ Member
Member # 40516
Default  Posted: 9:11 PM, May 28th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks so much for the info. It helps to hear from others that have been down this path. I feel better now. I meet with my lawyer next week. And thanks, kg201, for asking your lawyer. I know how to approach this with my lawyer now.


BW - me 43
WH - 45
M - 22.5 yrs
D-Day - 6/13/2013
2 DS and 1 DD
Divorcing
There are some things that "sorry" just doesn't fix... But I never even got a "sorry."

Posts: 94 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Southeast
Topic Posts: 11

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