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Gr8Lady (original poster member #36307) posted at 5:04 AM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
Many of us recall a song, smell that revives that memory so vividly. I am describing good memories.
How about the phrase that takes us back to bitch mode. I know some consider that a trigger.
Mine is. " she is just a kid and doesn't deserve drama". Mind you I caught the bitch in my home with my husband and the most absurd thing to me was all our family pix were on wall.
Recently I was told the same phrase about our granddauter by ex and a questionable decision she made . I was right back in the moment, yet I was dwelling on past. That phrase made me something I'm not round of.
I hate I am able to "go there". Embarrassing but I was right there 2 years ago reliving his affair.
Just hurts so much still. Thanks for listening to my rant/pain.
BS: Me (70yo)FWH: HIM (72 yo)) serial infidelities over past 35 years
DD: Multiple unconfirmed until 2013
friends wife lasting 10 years. TT over a
year a year. Now his health is declining,
among the lack of communication.
ThrownAwayTwice ( member #43226) posted at 5:22 AM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
Whenever he refers to our separation as a "breakup". It throws me right back to the night he texted me that he was choosing her.
I have told him this, and he has since made an effort to not refer to it as such anymore.
BW early 30's
Separated March 2014
Kintsukuroi: the art of repairing broken pottery with gold and silver laquer, and understanding that it is more beautiful for having been broken
RightTrack ( member #36976) posted at 6:20 AM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
His use of the word "forever".
5454real ( member #37455) posted at 6:27 AM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
"I didn't intend to ....."
Maybe not square one so much anymore, but insta-trigger.
BH 58, WW 49
DS 31(Mine),SD 29,SS 28(Hers),DS 16 Ours, DGS 11, DGD 8, DGS 3
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
"I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone."
― Sophocle
Lovedyoumore ( member #35593) posted at 6:29 AM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
Soul mate and love of my life
Me 50's
WH 50's
Married 30+ years
2 young adult children
OW single 20 years younger
Together trying to R
Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose
Melian40 ( member #41205) posted at 8:47 AM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
When he says "I don't remember"
BW-me:41
BH-him:42
DD-age 10
Together 7 years, married 17 years
DD1:8/12/2013 -OW1-PA 1.5 months in 2009
DD2:8/17/2013 - OW2-EA Spring 2013- He tried to hit on her but she denied.
"You can't fix a broken man, but he can break you"
UKgirl ( member #17062) posted at 12:57 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
When he calls anyone a liar. Or a cheat. I think the one that got me the most was when he was said a work colleague lacked any integrity because he cheated at golf!! And this same guy was “telling one thing to my face and then going behind my back and doing something else.” We were changing our broadband supplier, after talking to our existing one, he came off the phone and was seething. “I don’t like being lied to!!” Really?
Another is when he is away for work and tells me he is meeting a colleague/supplier/whoever for dinner and I’m straight back to wondering just how many times he said that when he was with honeytwat. 
Affair1: Dday 30/07/06 LTA: 5yrs ex-fiancee Affair2: Dday 04/09/20 9mths another XHSgf.Me/BS, still young. Him/WS, old. 4 grown boysHaving an affair because you are unhappy is like eating Ex-lax because you are hungry - unfound's mom
Losconang15 ( member #42544) posted at 3:49 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
"We are just friends" or anything along the lines of "just a friend". Makes my blood boil!
Jan 15, 2014. WH had EA/PA
Hopeful reconciliation
steadfast1973 ( member #24719) posted at 3:56 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
When he calls anyone a liar. Or a cheat.
YUP!
"I Love you more." Nah, motherfucker, you don't. He's gotten good at not saying that anymore.
Me- 42- BS Him- 38- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 multi EAs, likely PA, trickle truth, d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute Separated 1/2017
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah"
Faithful w/Love ( member #33128) posted at 4:31 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
"Just friends"
"We are just don't have it anymore"
"It's for the best"
"I'm in a zone"
Almost anything he says is a trigger!
BS(ME)41 WH(HIM)38
DD 21 and DS 16
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"
nutmegkitty ( member #33882) posted at 4:46 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
"We need to have a meeting."
That's what he said when he called me the day he found out OW was pregnant. I recall everything about that very second.
Me - happy!
2 DDs
Very happily divorced from an NPD since 2013.
Ostrich80 ( member #34827) posted at 4:46 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
"It's not like that" ws response to every one of my statements about him having an A.
"My bad" that catchy little phrase is not allowed in my house, even my kids know not to say it. Ow said it to me when I confronted her by text, then ws who never said it before, summed up he was still in contact when he said it to me in casual conversation.
""Your so insecure and jealous" said to me by ws AND ow when int suspicions were confirmed.
Man I feel the anger setting in just by typing this.
BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????
Faithful w/Love ( member #33128) posted at 4:51 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
Oh I forgot
"Its not like that and Not what you think"
"Ill never be with that girl"
All these while he threw the A in my face.
BS(ME)41 WH(HIM)38
DD 21 and DS 16
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"
sudra ( member #30143) posted at 5:29 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
"Soulmate" - because they thought they were. OW2 is the only woman my husband has said that to. Including me.
"Out of my league" - he thought she was, unlike me who was common enough to actually marry him.
"Friend" - their code word for each other in their facebook posts.
Me (BW) (5\64), Him(SAWH) (68)Married 31 years, 1 son (28), 1 stepdaughter (36) DDay #1 January 2004DDay #2 7-27-2010 7 month EA/PA (became "engaged" to OW before he told me he wanted a divorce)Working on R
rachelc ( member #30314) posted at 5:32 PM on Friday, May 30th, 2014
"Im going to give it to God." - talking to OW2. Whatever.... you're on your third affair. Obviously YOU can't handle it.
craig2001 ( member #55) posted at 12:31 AM on Saturday, May 31st, 2014
Just get over it
I don't remember
I don't know
deena04 ( member #41741) posted at 12:37 AM on Saturday, May 31st, 2014
I don't remember (well neither do I)
It wasn't about you (well I am suffering because of it) -and-
If we D, I'll have to get a one bedroom apt and sell all my stuff (too bad, should have thought of that)
These make my blood boil!
Me FBS 40s, Him XWS older than me (lovemywife4ever), D, He cheated before M, forgot to tell me. I’m free and loving life.
stunnedin12 ( member #38141) posted at 12:42 AM on Saturday, May 31st, 2014
"Are you ever going to forget?" (um, NO)
For the life of me I can't pick out the exact phrase, but wh still will occassionally try to shift the blame to me. He always uses the same words. It doesn't work so well.
I'm more a places/dates kind of person.
ME - Betrayed Spouse
Him - Wayward spouse
Lawyers involved.
lilacs40 ( member #31314) posted at 1:12 AM on Saturday, May 31st, 2014
Last fall WH started telling DS6 to "make good choices" since he seemed to be getting in trouble at school. Funny thing is that was right about the time WH was starting his EA. Thankfully he doesn't say it anymore because if he did I think I'd punch him in the head.
Imissmyhusb ( member #42734) posted at 9:46 PM on Saturday, May 31st, 2014
'It was just a lot of inappropriate conversation'
As if an EA is any less destructive than a PA ... And whats worse is i dont belv him abt there being no PA. So when i hear this phrase i feel like theres really a PA he is tryg to cover up
Multiple d-days and TT
3 kids
me - Gettg my life back, him - idk him any more
~~~~~~~~~
I dont know why I stay. Need to figure it out
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