Loving girlfriend of two years.
[This message edited by hurtbs at 6:06 PM, June 4th (Wednesday)]
"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate." - Asimov
"Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." - Ovid
I would suggest oral, and also suggest doing it again later the same night. Don't be critical. If you say something to him, it makes him think about it more which causes it to be a problem.
Also, nothing wrong with a little oral especially if YOU enjoy it. Let him enjoy the build up and release and then you get yours.
My guess is it will subside after you get more comfortable with each other. Give him time - calendar time, as well as time - in the sack time.
Separated, divorcing, moving on.
I edit because I always make typos.
So, it does reduce the sensation?
So, it does reduce the sensation?
ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12
I think guys sometimes put too much pressure on themselves, and then they loosen up once they feel more comfortable.
I vote for not ending it with him cumming. Schedule your romps in the sack with enough time for him to recover after the initial blast - say 30 minutes, and then resume. He should be able to think of something to do with you for 30 minutes....
What if he takes one out of the chamber in advance, so to speak either through oral or manual stimulation.
Both are good suggestions until he increases his "stamina".
Anyway, condoms really do reduce the sensation?
ETA: I can't stress this enough. Don't be afraid to tell your SO what you like and don't like. If he is truly interested in having a mutually pleasing experience he will want to know what you like. Don't assume he doesn't know what he is doing. For your body he absolutely may not know what he is doing which is why it helps to tell us. Believe me he won't mind that you are giving him tips on how to please you.
[This message edited by 7yrsflushed at 8:22 AM, June 5th (Thursday)]
So far, oral first, then he recovers, and off we go. Round 2 has always been great.
The first time I did oral on him, it was so fast I thought he might hyperventilate. Since we had talked about it, we were both very prepared.
You gotta be able to talk to the person you are having sex with ABOUT sex.
"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings
You’re going to have to explain to him that he's not in a race. A night of lovemaking should be savoured more like a long walk in the wood, followed by a leisurely hill climb, them relaxing moments stargazing lying in the grass at the top of hill.
Away you will go, sailing in a race among the ruins.
If you plan to face tomorrow, do it soon. Gordon Lightfoot
cme is right. You should be able to talk to him about it. And yes, in my experience, guys are more than happy to comply when you whisper "Baby, I would LOVE it if you'd do xyz to me..." Heck, I like that, too.
What's sexier than someone who knows that they want... and they want it with you?
[This message edited by wildbananas at 9:05 AM, June 5th (Thursday)]
I recommended this to my wife's best friend ( a woman with a new boyfriend in a similar situation). After a couple of times of trying it, this has become the norm for them and she says she is happy and satisfied.
The good news is it can TOTALLY be corrected. So don't write this guy off yet because of this...BUT, and I say BUT he is going to have to take action to correct this problem HIMSELF first. In short, He needs to train himself to be able to last longer (solo) before he can expect to be able to control himself with a partner.
Is this something you would feel comfortable talking with him about? As you get to know each other more and learn about this condition a bit you could also assist him in the process...which could actually be kind of fun for you too.
Here is a link to a good program . http://www.risingmaster.com/the-start-and-stop-method-key-to-curing-premature-ejaculation/
As far as I am concerned most of the other suggestions like adding an extra condom or doing it twice are not really good long term solutions. At least they were not for me. I wanted to be able to last longer the FIRST time with no condoms or other gimmicks so the only way to achieve this was to take matters into my own hands. I'm happy to report it worked for me and it can definitely work for him too.