Up until yesterday, I had 4 cats, all adopted over the course of three years from a local no-kill rescue group called PAWS. I adopted the 4th cat about 2.5 years ago and ever since I brought her home, I've been thinking to myself it was a mistake -- the other three have always picked on her, bullied her, tormented her, etc.
During the last 2.5 years, we all lived in 3 different homes, and each time I moved I hoped it would somehow level the playing field since "territory" would no longer be an issue. Things among the 4 cats would get better for a couple months then return to the pecking order of the first 3 bullying the 4th one. I tried Feliway, segregation, allowing the 4th one to be in places I don't let the other three, but nothing seemed to help. They would chase her, trap her in places and not let her out, scratch her face, etc. She was/is so sweet and laid back, she'd just take it and stay in hiding.
So I finally decided to do what I should've done from the beginning, surrender her back to the shelter so they can find her a home where she won't be bullied. In the end it will be so much better for her, but I can't seem to stop crying. The house is so lonely and empty (even with the other 3 cats and a dog). I keep seeing her or thinking I'll see her on a windowsill or a countertop. It's been less than 24 hours and the silence is deafening.
Just wanted to put all that out there. She was so scared at the shelter last night, she wouldn't even look at me when I said good-bye and "I'm sorry!". I wish there were some way to explain to a pet that it's for the best. I know the shelter people are really dedicated, and they'll take great care of her and find her a good home. But part of me wishes I could take her back and make it all better somehow...