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Newest Member: losingblindhope (44303)

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User Topic: told WW about SI
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 12:10 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You actually *said* "SI" or you just alluded to a website forum?

Dude. Buckle up, because if she finds you here....your life is about to become hell (most likely).


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7706 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
LostSamurai
♂ Member
Member # 41347
Default  Posted: 12:14 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have sent her links to this site a long time ago, and she never once bothered to even read them. I told her the name of the site and she still hasn't bothered. My life is already hell, I am slowly getting out of the pit.

Like I said it can't get any worst. What she going to say, "I want a divorce." HA.


I am now nothing by a mere Ronin.

Posts: 1029 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Maryland
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 12:14 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LS dude. YOU are not getting it, and you are justifying. She knows exactly how to suck you back in every freaking time.

You want to hear about DD's day? Talk to DD, Talk to her Grandparents. DO NOT talk to WW.

Set up a routine where you have your daughter, none of this playing with her at your wifes, take her with you. Even if it's to the park, or to McDonalds. Get away from the poison.

Let me say that again.

GET AWAY FROM THE POISON!!!!! YOUR WW IS THE POISON. SHE IS NOT THE PERSON YOU WANT HER TO BE OR BELIEVED SHE WAS.

As far as telling her about this site, NO. DO NOT DO IT.
You are far too weak, to let her come hear your struggles, and weak spots.

She is a master manipulator. Giving her access to this site, is like giving a mechanic a whole big giant set of Snap On tools with the cool cart. It will allow her to manipulate you even more.

If you don't engage she can't do it.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 7807 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
brokenblackbird
♀ Member
Member # 29541
Default  Posted: 12:16 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think we were more concerned with any further manipulation of you. You need this support for you.

To continue to think that it might somehow change her, if she read your words or the words of others, can lead to a real let down when the reality kicks in.


Posts: 726 | Registered: Sep 2010
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 12:24 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If you don't think things can get worse, YOU'RE WRONG.

We are trying to protect you LS.

And I'm surprised gonnabe didn't expand on what happens when you lead an unremorseful spouse to this website (I'm pretty sure I remember dissing her ex, Sultan, KNOWING he was reading it).

You know how many people down in D/S WANT support, but they CAN'T post about what's happening because their ex can read and see everything?

It's giving her a window into your soul and further ammunition to manipulate you.

Maybe you think saying you want a divorce is the end of things. NOPE. Saying you want a divorce is the BEGINNING of what might be the biggest fight of your life. DIVORCE IS WAR. BUCKLE UP. And please, for the love of God, don't give this woman any more knives to stab you with.

PROTECT YOURSELF LS.


xBW~ 35
Two of the most darling sons ~ 10 and 7

Posts: 2005 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
LostSamurai
♂ Member
Member # 41347
Default  Posted: 12:28 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ok. I will. Thank you for the advice and 2x4's and 8x8's. Lord knows I need them because I will fall when I need to stand up and fight...


I am now nothing by a mere Ronin.

Posts: 1029 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Maryland
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 12:29 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Like I said it can't get any worst

Oh, LS. You have no idea.......


I didn't expand because I got the impression that the horse was already out of the barn.....
(and stbx has been re-dubbed. He's now called Monster).


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7706 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
annb
♀ Member
Member # 22386
Default  Posted: 12:32 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Please don't do this.
She is unremorseful. She is highly manipulative. She is emotionally abusive.

She will pick your posts apart.

You are trying to detach..right?

If you show her this site and your posts, you know full well she will pick your posts apart. She will text you abuse over and over..and over. She will use this against you. She will bring things up that you have put to rest.

She will use this to cause you more pain.

Im all for WS's coming to SI.

But unremorseful WS who are especially cruel..like your WW? AND...you...the BH.. obviously still in love with her and hoping she will wake up..AND you are going to get a divorce?

NO.


In some situations, I would recommend this site to a REMORSEFUL spouse. Your WW is not remorseful, and she may very well have another weapon to use against you.


Posts: 7389 | Registered: Jan 2009 | From: Northeast
LostSamurai
♂ Member
Member # 41347
Default  Posted: 12:37 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do have one question. Why the heck does she keep asking am I ok. What's the point?


I am now nothing by a mere Ronin.

Posts: 1029 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Maryland
TrustedHer
♂ Member
Member # 23328
Default  Posted: 12:45 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do have one question. Why the heck does she keep asking am I ok. What's the point?

Because she is a master manipulator, a puppet master.

It's an opening. A hook. It makes her look like a human being, concerned for another.

It's a lie.


Take care of yourself. There's a great future out there. It won't come to you; you have to go to it.

Posts: 5119 | Registered: Mar 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
LostSamurai
♂ Member
Member # 41347
Default  Posted: 12:48 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hmm, your right about that TrustedHer. If she was really concern she would be reaching out to me, hell, she wouldn't have left in the first place.


I am now nothing by a mere Ronin.

Posts: 1029 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Maryland
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 12:48 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She wants to keep her control over you.

You think she WANTS you to move on and find happiness? The answer is NO.

She wants you blaming yourself for all of this, and she WANTS you to keep bearing your soul in the hopes that she will change. That way she KNOWS she still has her hooks in you.

You HAVE to put a shell around yourself when it comes to her. Sorry, but you don't get to be the same person with her that you are with other people. With her, it's time for STEALTH MODE.


xBW~ 35
Two of the most darling sons ~ 10 and 7

Posts: 2005 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
brokenblackbird
♀ Member
Member # 29541
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do have one question. Why the heck does she keep asking am I ok. What's the point?

Hoovering. Trying to suck you back into the drama.

Its in the Cheater's Handbook. A whole chapter dedicated to keeping you on the line.

IGNORE.

Are you answering her?


Posts: 726 | Registered: Sep 2010
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What's the point?

To keep you hooked.

Is it working?


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6061 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
wildbananas
♀ Member
Member # 10552
Default  Posted: 1:23 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I never told ex-asshat about SI but he found out about it on his own.

Dude... I don't really know your story but if she isn't remorseful (and if you're Ding), don't share your safe place with her. Because trust me, it won't be safe anymore. And that sucks. I had to pull back from SI a few times because of that.


Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

Posts: 15362 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Now an AZ girl
swizzlestick03
♀ Member
Member # 30102
Default  Posted: 1:40 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do have one question. Why the heck does she keep asking am I ok. What's the point?

She is asking because she is building a case on how you are unfit and unstable. She asked about you and your meds too, right?

LS--you have to go no contact. It isn't as hard if you simply DETACH. You cannot make her be what you need or want her to be. It is that simple.

We are trying to help you here--we've BTDT and can tell you how it is going to end.

She is unremorseful--don't think for one second she won't try any.trick.in.the.book to get what she wants. Beware.


Me: BW-32
Him: WS-31
D-Day #1: 16 August 2010
D-Day #2: 16 January 2011
One small kiddo.

Posts: 558 | Registered: Nov 2010
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 2:27 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Why the heck does she keep asking am I ok. What's the point?

1. Because she can manipulate you more.
2. Because YOU keep answering her.

If you don't engage she will stop. Eventually.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 7807 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
Topic Posts: 37
Pages: 1 · 2

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