Topic: One month update
Member # 10552
| Posted: 12:04 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
Tomorrow is the one month anniversary of our big move to another state! It feels like we've been here so much longer than that.
The bunch and I are all settling in our new home. The younger two bananas got to go to school for a whole week and a half because school here ended weeks before it did in our old town. Baby banana (11) absolutely adores her new school and already has made friends. She also loves the area. Middle banana (almost 15) is having a harder time but she's much better now than when we got here. Oldest girl banana (18) is looking for a job. She's a bit out of sorts with starting over (she's already out of high school) but is handling it pretty well.
I'm also finding my feet. Starting over at 46 is a lot harder than I thought it would be! Learning my new job (project management) is going to take a while... very long learning curve. I alternate between feeling confident and being scared out of my mind and missing my comfy bubble at my last job, one I knew inside out.
It's also been hard without my friends around here. I knew people here before we moved but not like my existing friendships, ones that took years to build. I know it'll all come - it just takes (all together now!) time.
Lastly, of course, my LDR is no longer LD... it's just an R. That took a bit of adapting. I was used to seeing him every four weeks or so (on average) and now, I literally see him every day and surprise... I actually like it. And so does he. We've both been very mindful of boundaries and so far, so good. Our kids cross paths a bit here and there (and all get along just fine) but we aren't playing happy families or anything like that. Neither of us want to go down that path for a while... if ever.
I'm also being very careful of not leaning on him too much or not making his life mine, you know? I know I need friends and activities of my own and I'm working on that, slowly but surely.
All in all, it's been hard and scary and sad... but it's also brought a lot of good. I know in my toes it was the right thing to do for me and the bunch and I don't regret it, even on the bad days.
Thanks for all the encouragement you guys gave me when I was thinking about this... and then when I was making it happen. We'll get there, one step at a time.
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan
Posts: 15435 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Now an AZ girl
Member # 36445
| Posted: 1:12 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
Glad it's all working out for you all. In time I am sure it will feel like you were never anywhere else.
Best of luck in your NB in new town.
"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.
Posts: 1381 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
|Sad in AZ|
Member # 24239
| Posted: 6:24 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
Any change is scary; it's exponentially so when you have kids to worry about. I also understand about friends. I'm not good about making new friends, but you seem to have the personality for it.
I'm happy for you I hope you continue to grow and thrive in your new environment.
I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.
Posts: 20453 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Member # 15584
| Posted: 7:37 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
Wow. A month already?!? That was fast. I'm glad to hear such a positive update!! Do the girls have any summer plans? Day activities or anything while you're at work? It sounds like things can't get any better than they are!
Failure is success if we learn from it.
Posts: 4224 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Member # 22870
| Posted: 7:43 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
Woot! You're totally getting it done, girl!
You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright
Posts: 7820 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Member # 30341
| Posted: 9:41 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
Wonderful story about your new beginning Nanner! (and reading and thinking your topic title I was struck by what a difference this kind of "one month update" was from the kind we all posted in the way way back times when recovering from the shock. It's good to take a moment to realize just how far we have come!)
DDay 11/17/2010 BW:53
Posts: 3236 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Member # 33129
| Posted: 9:46 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
You are doing it! Change is not easy, but your positive outlook will make everything ok! :)
divorced the Dooosh
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
Posts: 3631 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
Member # 14866
| Posted: 9:58 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
great update. Glad things are going so well.
Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.
Posts: 53012 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Member # 26928
| Posted: 10:30 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
I'm so glad to hear that you and the Nana bunch are doing well.
Me - 42
SorryInSac (STBX WH#2) - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - Done
DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats
WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW) - Legally married 18yrs
I edit often for clarity/typos.
Posts: 6690 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
Member # 20150
| Posted: 10:52 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire
Posts: 17708 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
Member # 30346
| Posted: 10:57 AM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
This is awesome.
Can you do some volunteer work somewhere? PTA? That is how I try to keep my "friend options open" so I meet new people.
me...BS, 44 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17
Posts: 4231 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
Member # 18334
| Posted: 12:06 PM, June 9th (Monday), 2014|
You are doing great!!! Congrats!!!
I think...therefore, I'm single.
It is what it is.
Posts: 4801 | Registered: Feb 2008
|Topic Posts: 12|