I apologize...the above post was written by me..I was on my husband's tablet and didnt realize I had logged in under his name.
What *I* meant to post..
My responses are based on my experience...which is very similar to UtterlyShattered's. Finding out your husband gave a bj to another man is different than finding out he cheated with a woman. It's hurts the same...but there are other things that need to be considered and dealt with. I, too, believed I knew my husband. Had anyone told me he would do what he did I never e would have believed it. I'd been with him for over a decade...I knew him...except didn't,obviously. I'm guessing OP would say the same.
He may be gay..He may be bi...he may be bicurious. But she needs to know.She will not feel safe unless she knows. At the very least they need to discuss why he cheated with a man. Her husband didn't happen upon this encounter. He placed an ad. He purposely sought out a man. She needs to know why.BS(me)42
M: June 2001
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.