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User Topic: Ask the menz...
Brandon808
♂ Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 2:18 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do different positions feel different? Is there a certain position that is more "mind-blowing" and another is "meh...?"
Yes, they feel different. None of them feel "meh" to me. I would try to pay attention to how they felt for her. Yes, there was a more mind-blowing position, but I don't know the term for it and don't want to describe it really.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 3872 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
simplydevastated
♀ Member
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 2:19 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I find this surprising. Most men I've talked to would never do MMF. They were willing to consider MFM though.

I didn't realize it meant in any specific order. I thought it was just two men and and one woman.


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
silverhopes
♀ Member
Member # 32753
Default  Posted: 2:22 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you guys for all your answers on video games!

WWE

It's like a male soap opera.

Mr. Silver explained it the same way! That was what got me into it (originally just trying to be his "favorite recreational companion", but some of the storylines are damn funny. (Former) Team Hell No for the win!)

OK, for a more difficult question (hope I word it OK):

Did you marry your best sexual partner, or was there someone else who was your best?
If you didn't marry your best, did things improve until your wife was your best, or were there just some experiences that were difficult to live up to? What (outside of not commit infidelity ) could she have done to be your best?

And I apologize in advance if these questions are triggery for some of you. Triggery topic in general, unfortunately.


Find peace. Or sleep on it.
Sometimes my monkeys, sometimes my circus.
Infidelities are like icebergs - they may take many different shapes and sizes, but they all damage your ship.

Posts: 3905 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: California
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 2:22 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I didn't realize it meant in any specific order. I thought it was just two men and and one woman.


MFM is two men who play with the woman, but don't play with each other.

MMF is two men who play with the woman and each other.

[This message edited by lieshurt at 2:23 PM, June 25th (Wednesday)]


Choices, Chances, Changes.....You must make a Choice to take a Chance or your life will never Change.

Posts: 13769 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
Tred
♂ Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 2:25 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'll take your word for it Lies...so not Googling that!


Married: 17 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 3960 | Registered: Dec 2011
7yrsflushed
♂ Member
Member # 32258
Default  Posted: 2:26 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do different positions feel different? Is there a certain position that is more "mind-blowing" and another is "meh...?"
Yes, and I am pretty sure it has to do with personal preference. Different positions can put varying degrees of pressure on different areas. I can last longer in certain positions and one position in particular hits the right spot repeatedly and it's over. I don't know of any positions that are meh. There are some that I like better than others though.

As for the looking away thing. I prefer to look at my partner but yes, distracting yourself during the act does help at times to prevent premature detonation.


D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

Posts: 1905 | Registered: May 2011 | From: VA
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 2:27 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Even with an Eiffel Tower (MFM I guess), still seems to me the men are "playing" with each other..

Barf..


xBW~ 35
Two of the most darling sons ~ 10 and 7

Posts: 2249 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
katiescarlett
♀ Member
Member # 43399
Default  Posted: 2:27 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do your spines really tingle when you're about to blow?

lol. I've read that description a lot. My husband says that he doesn't feel it though.


MH-27
MH-28
3 boys
My D-Day July 2014 and numerous others.
His D-Day 8-20-14

Posts: 105 | Registered: May 2014
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 2:28 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'll take your word for it Lies...so not Googling that!

@ Tred


Choices, Chances, Changes.....You must make a Choice to take a Chance or your life will never Change.

Posts: 13769 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
Brandon808
♂ Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 2:37 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do your spines really tingle when you're about to blow?
Sometimes. The intensity can vary.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 3872 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
WearingTheHorns
♂ Member
Member # 37916
Default  Posted: 2:47 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I find this surprising. Most men I've talked to would never do MMF. They were willing to consider MFM though.

I didn't realize the order made a difference either. That being the case what I was referring to would've been an MFM and a FMF.

As far as spine tingling? Yes, sometimes. Depending on the intensity of the O, afterwards too.

[This message edited by WearingTheHorns at 2:47 PM, June 25th (Wednesday)]


Dday: over a period of three days 11/14-16/2012.
EA/PA: ~ 2 1/2 years
EA/beginning PA: ~ 10 months

"What God has joined together, let man... no man put asunder" -Pastor at our wedding concluding the ceremony

2 Cor 12:9-10


Posts: 272 | Registered: Dec 2012
7yrsflushed
♂ Member
Member # 32258
Default  Posted: 2:51 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Did you marry your best sexual partner, or was there someone else who was your best?
Yes and No. Prior to the A we were learning each other and things were great. I had done more with previous partners but the idea is to grow with your partner so I expected it to get better. Once she started up the A's that all went out the window. She did shit with her AP that she didn't with me but meh past history.

If you didn't marry your best, did things improve until your wife was your best, or were there just some experiences that were difficult to live up to?
Things were improving until she started the A's. We actually had done everything but she started shutting down when she started her first A and I didn't know it. I chalked it up to sex goes away after you are married and have kids. It doesn't she was just having it with her AP's.

What (outside of not commit infidelity ) could she have done to be your best?

Have an open dialogue. Discuss what she likes and doesnt' like. Discuss what I like and don't like. Be open to trying new things. If something is completely off the table then don't be afraid to say so. This is supposed to be a pleasurable experience both ways. If my partner isn't happy then something is wrong and I would hope they would let me know so I can try to resolve the issues or try something different or never try that again if it was uncomfortable. it.


D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

Posts: 1905 | Registered: May 2011 | From: VA
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I find this surprising. Most men I've talked to would never do MMF. They were willing to consider MFM though.

Oops! Didn't know the order mattered. I meant two dudes taking care of one woman.

Did you marry your best sexual partner, or was there someone else who was your best?

Shortly after I left her, The Princess told me that she is the best partner I'll ever have. She was wrong. She never was the best, but sex is really always good! Seriously, I have never uttered the phrase "I grow weary of these orgasms."

What (outside of not commit infidelity ) could she have done to be your best?

Just some communication would be nice. She would always let me talk about my fantasies, and then mock me for them afterward. She NEVER shared her fantasies. I think she liked having that power over me - that she had seen me at my most vulnerable.


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 1987 | Registered: Jan 2013
SoCo
♀ Member
Member # 33907
Default  Posted: 3:10 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ok menz .... Sex as a stess release vs. excerise, hobbies, conversation?

Had a bad day boss yelled at you, report over due...... Money issues?

Is sex the best stress reliever?

Sex as a expression of love?

Controllable need/act? It's offered you want it, you need it, you can't not go for it?

ETA... How much does the who vs. the feelings of really matter?

[This message edited by SoCo at 3:36 PM, June 25th (Wednesday)]


BS (me)
WS (him)
DDay. Jan. 2010
AKA Whydidyou (long story)

Posts: 314 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South Carolina
h0peless
♂ Member
Member # 36697
Default  Posted: 3:19 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ok menz .... Sex as a stess release vs. excerise, hobbies, conversation?

For me, it was always a means of connecting with the ex and an expression of happiness. Being stressed out does not put me in the mood. Quite the opposite, in fact.

Had a bad day boss yelled at you, report over due...... Money issues?

I'm definitely not in the mood if those things happen.

Is sex the best stress reliever?

Not for me. I'd rather do something physically or mentally demanding that doesn't involve trying to connect with another person when I'm stressed out. I need space when I'm stressed.

Sex as a expression of love?

The best sex is.

Controllable need/act? It's offered you want it, you need it, you can't not go for it?

My almost two years of celibacy aren't due to a lack of opportunity. For me, it's a strong urge but a very controllable one. We developed a prefrontal cortex for a reason.


Posts: 1694 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Baja Arizona
Razor
♂ Member
Member # 16345
Default  Posted: 3:20 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Did you marry your best sexual partner, or was there someone else who was your best?

Oh hell NO. Im not that experienced. only 5 partners total. BUT I was fortunate when it came to the 4 previous to WW.
#2 was the girl I probably should have M. Unfortunately she was a exchange student and shortly after she returned to her home country (I promised to write and come visit) 2 of my brothers were murdered. With all the chaos I lost contact with her.
#4 was a gymnast and a real freak in the bedroom or anywhere else that suited her fancy. I loved the sex but not her.

If you didn't marry your best, did things improve until your wife was your best, or were there just some experiences that were difficult to live up to?

No. its never improved. The sex has always been so-so. Good but not mind blowing. She refuses to experiment or try anything different.

What (outside of not commit infidelity ) could she have done to be your best?

Learn to trust me. I think that with trust between us things would improve in the bedroom. Funny that her lack of trust for me would be a issue since she is the one that cheated and betrayed me for years.


Forgive and forget = Relive and regret.

Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man.
Friedrich Nietzsche


Posts: 3483 | Registered: Sep 2007
h0peless
♂ Member
Member # 36697
Default  Posted: 3:22 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, I missed some questions!

Did you marry your best sexual partner, or was there someone else who was your best?

My experience is extremely limited (two including the ex) but yeah, the ex was better than the girl I lost my virginity to. Mainly because I was really nervous and had performance issues, but the ex was definitely better in bed.


Posts: 1694 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Baja Arizona
BrokenButTrying
♀ Member
Member # 42111
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When we ask 'what are you thinking about?' Are you really thinking about nothing? How is that possible?


Me - 27
Him - 27
Madhatters

My Ddays - 01/10 & 12/04/14
His Dday - 23/12/13

Chin up. Unwavering. Fight. I can do this.


Posts: 1235 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: UK
Razor
♂ Member
Member # 16345
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ok menz .... Sex as a stress release vs. excerise, hobbies, conversation?

Ive never thought of sex as a stress release. A physical release YES. If its been a while between um... encounters and my boys are backed up and turning blue. YES its a great physical release.


Forgive and forget = Relive and regret.

Hope in reality is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man.
Friedrich Nietzsche


Posts: 3483 | Registered: Sep 2007
h0peless
♂ Member
Member # 36697
Default  Posted: 3:29 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When we ask 'what are you thinking about?' Are you really thinking about nothing? How is that possible?

Usually. Sometimes when i would say that, I would be thinking about something she wouldn't care about like changing the oil on my motorcycle or something like that but our minds are often a blank slate. I would pose the question "how can you constantly be thinking about stuff and not drive yourself insane" but I think that's a Mars/Venus thing.


Posts: 1694 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Baja Arizona
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