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User Topic: Ask the menz...
saturnpatrick
♂ Member
Member # 35989
Default  Posted: 5:49 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He is going, isn't he?

Sometimes I'm not really feeling up for hanging out with my own buddies but when I drag my ass out to go, I usually end up having a good time.

He might not be overjoyed about it now, but if he goes he may just have fun anyway.

Especially if you and him plan some hoo-haa/boobs/size matter time...


BH
I typo therefore I edit.

Posts: 197 | Registered: Jun 2012
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 5:50 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG

YOP

I go brewery hopping!!

Actually I do it all, well except that threesome stuff

I feel a little guilty taking that kind of money for a trip I want, but really am not comfortable doing a girls Vegas weekend!

Especially if you and him plan some hoo-haa/boobs/size matter time...

[This message edited by karmahappens at 5:50 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3850 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 5:52 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2222 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
LA44
♀ Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 5:57 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

@karma....The thing about Vegas (baby) is that there is something for everyone. Would he enjoy lounging poolside? Or seeing a Cirque show which are supposed to be A-MA-ZING. He can go to Paris, sit on a beach and ride a coaster through a hotel on the same day!

I am not a gambler so its not first on my list but I would go back to Vegas as there is fun to be had.

ps: No, you are not selfish.


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2482 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
Rebreather
♀ Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 6:03 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Karma, go! Either with the girls or as a couple. I do Vegas with my gf's and it is no big deal. We aren't on the hunt and there is tons to do, although we do drink a.lot. He may not be jumping for joy, but he's willing to go to make you happy. Give him the chance to make you happy!

(of course I am in Vegas almost every week, so you better tell me when you are there! lol)


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6569 | Registered: Jan 2011
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 6:04 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Would he enjoy lounging poolside? Or seeing a Cirque show which are supposed to be A-MA-ZING. He can go to Paris, sit on a beach and ride a coaster through a hotel on the same day!

He would enjoy these things...the problem is I want to go and gamble. I want to enter a poker tournament and casino hop...he HATES gambling.

My whole reason for going is to Gamble. I have told him I will do the shows and what not as well, but I want to go to Vegas and play.

Maybe it isn't fair. There's not much giving on my side for this trip, but the only other option is for him to not come with...


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3850 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
BrokenButTrying
♀ Member
Member # 42111
Default  Posted: 6:06 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Funny what you get when you google penis size surviving infidelity

Those threads are crazy! Definitely won't be starting an ask the womenz thread!


Me - 27
Him - 27
Madhatters

My Ddays - 01/2010 & 12/04/14
His Dday - 23/12/13

Chin up. Unwavering. Fight. I can do this.


Posts: 1258 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: UK
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 6:09 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

@BBT really? Why's that??

Yes we menz are nucking futz too


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2222 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
7yrsflushed
♂ Member
Member # 32258
Default  Posted: 6:09 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So am I being selfish?
No you aren't selfish but has he said why he doesn't want to go? I went a month or so ago for the first time and thought I would be bored because I don't gamble. I WAS WRONG! I didn't want to leave and I already am planning another trip out next year. There is so much to do out there and it literally is non stop from shows, tours, museums, gun ranges, clubs, day parties, more shows, food, sight seeing, etc. If he wants to relax there are spas, he can lounge at the pool, go to a sports bar, drink till he passes out or read a book and relax. Yes there is the Sin City part but unless you go looking for it the most you will encounter is dodging the sketchy dudes and dudettes on the corners handing out billfolds. It's kind of impossible not to find something fun, relaxing, or entertaining to do in Vegas unless your green and make it your business to jack hoos on Xmas eve every year.

ETA: Karma if you want to gamble the newer hotels ALL have higher minimums. The older casinos have cheaper tables. Everything is within walking distance or a quick cab ride. You can walk into any casino and gamble so if you want to gamble you will have a ball.

[This message edited by 7yrsflushed at 6:12 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]


D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

Posts: 1914 | Registered: May 2011 | From: VA
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 6:12 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Is today Friday? I've got a glass of scotch in hand, reading back through this thread I'm laughing harder than the first time!!

Keep the questions coming ladies. Hopefully we menz are proving we have some worth here.


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2222 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 6:16 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No you aren't selfish but has he said why he doesn't want to go?

He hates gambling...doesn't like when I do it.

I love it, do it within boundaries we set up and never spend what we cant afford. I actually rarely go anymore, but Vegas, yeah I wanna go.

He sees it as throwing money away, I see it as entertainment.

He would want to spend the time with me and not the guys on the trip...but I will be MIA, lol.

@ Rebreather, I will definitely be in touch when we go!!


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3850 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
BrokenButTrying
♀ Member
Member # 42111
Default  Posted: 6:17 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My parents went to Vegas. Ok, that doesn't sound like a big deal but we're English. My mum is in her 50's and my SD is in his 60's. They are NOT the sort of people you imagine go to Vegas but they were travelling up to San Fran anyway so stopped in for a couple of days for the experience.

It's worth going just to say you've been, I think!


Me - 27
Him - 27
Madhatters

My Ddays - 01/2010 & 12/04/14
His Dday - 23/12/13

Chin up. Unwavering. Fight. I can do this.


Posts: 1258 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: UK
BrokenButTrying
♀ Member
Member # 42111
Default  Posted: 6:21 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nucking futz is about right, YOP. I can't believe it's such a big deal (pun definitely intended!)


Me - 27
Him - 27
Madhatters

My Ddays - 01/2010 & 12/04/14
His Dday - 23/12/13

Chin up. Unwavering. Fight. I can do this.


Posts: 1258 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: UK
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 6:24 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I play local poker tournaments here in Daytona and Tampa, but nothing was like Vegas! I took third in a large no-limit hold'em tourney and walked away with over $3500, on a $60 buy-in. I had a BLAST!

And my ex was sulking in the hotel room the whole time since he went out early. The little baby.. The buttwipe wasn't even excited or happy for me when I won! I'll just guess he was cheating on me and missing one of his OW during that trip too..

The rest of my family on the trip had so much fun, and when I wasn't gambling, I had a blast too. There are SOOOOO many shows and cool places to just walk around in Vegas. And so much food! There's so much to do besides gamble and sleep with hookers and see peep shows. Even kids can have a good time! Mine just loved the magic shows.

I would try to encourage your husband and maybe check out any shows that will be in or around your hotel that he could go to, but then let him make his own choice. I would have LOVED a trip to Vegas on my own, being able to play poker without worrying if the hubby was having fun..

[This message edited by ButterflyGirl at 6:27 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ asurvivor

Posts: 2398 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
GotPlayed
♂ Member
Member # 41294
Default  Posted: 6:31 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey I just discovered this.

menage

When I do think about it (less than twice per year, mind you) it's always two women, and I'm more interested about learning about how they please each other, as a woman knows a woman. Kind of upping my game a bit. Sure I want to join but under their direction mostly. And yes, the status factor.

Disclaimer: Of my circle of friends, only one of us was "popular with the girls" (certainly not me). And it was an obsession for him. In similar terms than mine (2 girls). He got close once, at a bar, he couldn't make it happen beyond 3-way kissing at the dance floor (one of the girls was lesbian and had always wanted to get it on with his GF). The "macho energy" of him "almost getting there" stuck with me so I guess it's mostly status. 2 men one woman raises exactly zero interest in me. Selfish? Sure, but they're fantasies. And in my opinion women overthinking it is no good. A fantasy is objectifying. That's why it's a fantasy. Ironically, thinking back, if my friend had "closed" those so many years ago I would have lost a bunch of respect for him.

But I know in reality it would be awfully awkward, cause huge performance issues (I like to properly please, and two is definitely too much work) and I just don't want to actually do it. So some things should stay fantasy. S for me menage is definitely the "stays a fantasy" case as I care too much about people to do something so selfish - even if it's supposed to be "NSA", I'm simply not wired like that. If I'm getting it on with you it means something, and I don't pay for sex for the same reason. Since it can't mean something with two, and I try to stay true to my principles, then it will stay a fantasy forever. And I'm perfectly ok with that.


the female and I wanted to experiment with each other

What's your phone#? j/k - but it proves my point above. It's definitely about the excitement of the girls getting it on, and I'm sure there'd be tons of awkwardness.


hoo-haa

Same here, by then the sexual energy is such I'm not thinking per se. Something wonderful is about to happen, and that's that. Having said that, they're all beautiful in their own way. And no, it's not a cop-out.

boobs

Yes, please.

I like them best on the bigger-but-not-huge side. I'm definitely considered a "boob-man" by everyone I know. I haven't dated a lot, and I feel lucky that WW's were very nice. I feel about boob jobs like cheating in math. Sure, the A is great, but I'd much rather have a C earned honestly. Because I'm going to be there (they're not just for show, right?). And I don't want to feel the silicone inside (does it feel like anything? not sure - no frame of reference...). Just "lifting" but not changing cup would be ok as there's no extra material involved. I never judged boobs once in the relationship though. He probably wasn't lying when he said he liked them before nor after the job. You can like them for different reasons, as we're simple creatures and we just like them all.

power washer

Never owned one. I can advise about lots of high tech stuff though.

fantasy football league

My stats-based sports is RPG videogames.

freaking lucky you are that you can pee standing up

I thank God every morning at 5:30-6AM, otherwise I may fall asleep sitting down!

Why is it that older men always look for the young bodies?

My father's current marriage is to someone who was half his age when he married. I'm a long time from dating still, but I'm currently torn between targeting younger women (who I'd gravitate more to physically) than women my age (who would be more mature, especially since I don't want a repeat of my current sich - not sure that would make a difference, and can also be beautiful - I was certainly ready to stay with WW forever and wasn't seeing anything I didn't like).

If I wasn't serious, I may be going for the younger set. Genes - my dad is like that - who knows?

Having said that, I don't go for non-serious relationships, which brings me back to the set of similar to my age. I don't know if I could have a real conversation with a lot of younger people unless they're highly intellectual, which pushes the age up quite a bit.

Currently confused about that - keep in mind I didn't date for 18 years though! Aren't we all lucky it's not all looks?

So I guess the takeaway would be that it's self-selecting in a positive way as you age. If they're interested in younger women, they're not going to be serious - and that's a good thing? Don't know, I'm an optimist.

Vegas

Nobody's being selfish by bringing someone else to Vegas. There's all kinds of stuff to do if the group is not your thing. Shows, gambling, drinking, betting on sports.. I don't know you'd ever get bored there.


Master of my Fate, Captain of my Soul.
BS 42, WW 41. 18y married
DD: 11/5/13
DS10 Autism, DD8
OM: Reformed wife-beater ex-con
D filed 1/14/14 by WW (never warn them, they'll get ahead)
Married a powder keg

Posts: 755 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: California
Tred
♂ Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 6:34 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Funny what you get when you google penis size surviving infidelity
Who the hell thinks to do that?

To me, when I got married I "knew" my wife's body would age. I mean come on - that's life. Hair falls out, turns gray, tits sag, balls start teabagging the toilet...anything else is trying to turn back time to when "your" body was at that stage. It's trying to reclaim something that in all honesty, probably ain't coming back.

But this thread is hilarious. Doubt Air Mod will be lifting off due to some of the content though

Let's see:
Menage something French - that would be too intimidating in reality. See the Menz thread about not being as good as I thought I was - right now, I don't know . I'd like to keep it that way.

All lady parts are great. Treat them as gifts mates.

Nothing selfish in self care. Never feel guilty about enjoying something someone else doesn't. Why does everyone feel they have to be 100% compatible?

[This message edited by Tred at 6:35 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]


Married: 17 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 4028 | Registered: Dec 2011
Maxiom
♂ Member
Member # 26001
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

PPGA,

I have seen and my answer still stands.

Why is it that older men always look for the young bodies?

I do have an appreciation for younger bodies too. Its really more of a memory association with my own youth. Regardless, you know what I have always found attractive? Any woman just comfortable in their own skin regardless of their own imperfections. Lets face it.. us guys have our own insecurities, but no one want us to dwell upon them.

How people appear is really just window dressing. attraction goes beyond that. and for me.. there isn't anything more attractive then confidence.


Me: FBS/WS 41
Her FWS/BS 41
My DDay - March 10, 2007 Whole Truth - May 2007
Her DDay - March 2, 2011
True NC March 3, 2011

Posts: 462 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: Canada
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 6:44 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't think I'd be up to the task. Might find the whole experience a little too stimulating. I have more than enough on my plate trying to please one woman.

Truthfully, I'd probably have the opposite problem. The sleaze factor would curtail my enjoyment and I'd look for a hole to crawl into as soon as it was over. Some things work better in fantasy than reality.

[This message edited by Sal1995 at 6:44 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]


Me (BS)-45, WW-43
DDay 2/17/13, 9-10 month PA/EA
M - 18 years, 4 children
Reconciling

Posts: 1462 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
yearsofpain25
♂ Member
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 7:07 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

@Tred

Who the hell thinks to do that?

That would be me. Since the ladies were talking about opening a thread for the menz on penis size and I couldn't forget how terribly those other threads were, I had to find them to show how bad of an idea it was. Crazy making topic.

From Maxiom

Regardless, you know what I have always found attractive? Any woman just comfortable in their own skin regardless of their own imperfections.

Perfectly said.


25 years and counting of pain caused by mother's infidelity. Aftermath: 1 deceased sibling, 1 lost family, 3 lost souls.
"Each new day I am just glad to be alive and have survived all that I did." Ashland13

Posts: 2222 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 7:09 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What's your phone#?

1-800-I'mTooOldForThatNow

But I could look for the number of the pager I had in my early 20s. I'm not sure you're gonna reach her though..

It was definitely an "experimenting" time of my life, the typical college years I guess, learning who you are and what you want. I had my fair share of female experiences, and I've always fought for gay rights, but as it turns out, I love the penis.

I was definitely young and immature, and sex certainly has way more to do with emotional intimacy than the physical aspects for me now..

And even though it was "consensual" all around, seeing my "boyfriend" be naked and have sex with another woman definitely sucked. Which is why I don't plan on doing it ever again. Definitely a fantasy better left in my head..

But passionate sex with someone I love wholeheartedly and who loves me back just as much? Now THAT is a fantasy I would like to make a reality again one day..

[This message edited by ButterflyGirl at 7:11 PM, June 24th (Tuesday)]


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ asurvivor

Posts: 2398 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
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