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Newest Member: JRconfused (45363)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Rules for a successful R??
tornapartheart
♀ New Member
Member # 43890
Default  Posted: 5:05 PM, June 27th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Did you make a written contract for R?
I'm thinking I will make a contract and present it to WS today, and if he doesn't want to abide by it, I have all his clothes and belongings already packed and by the door.

What were some rules you established for a successful R?


BS(me)-24
WS-24
DD-5 yrs old
OW: Girl he met at a comic book store we used to frequent. He "liked" her and had sex with her for at least a month. Possibly is still sleeping with her.

Posts: 35 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: Los Angeles, CA
peoplepleaser
♀ Member
Member # 41535
Default  Posted: 5:15 PM, June 27th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Read the thread in here called "Before you say R..." It's wonderful for laying out the needs of a BS.

I had these:

100% transparency and accountability
Expressed remorse
IC
MC
Recognizing that I was in no way responsible for the EAs
No alone time with feminine women
The truth about the worst of what she did

I did the 180 until she agreed and we were separated in-house. I told her to start looking for an apartment when she decided to meet my needs for R.

Risk you relationship to save it.

Good luck.


WS: 39--2 EAs
BS: 39--me, faithful
DS: 6
9 year relationship in R.
DDay #1: September 6, 2013 EA for 5 weeks August 2013.
DDay #2: January 2, 2014 EA for 6 weeks summer 2011.
"I am still learning." -Michelangelo

Posts: 711 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: Midwest
rachelc
♀ Member
Member # 30314
Default  Posted: 5:29 PM, June 27th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

check out this thread. Mhca made this list of requirements:

http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=534004


his Dday: 2/10 but TT until 7/11
my Ddays: 1/12, 4/12 broken NC 12/12

me (WW/BS): 48
him: (BS/WH)52
4 kiddos in mid 20's

“Follow your intuition. Be smart, be brave. Tell the truth and don’t take any shit.”


Posts: 5283 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Midwest
Topic Posts: 3

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