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User Topic: The guy who left his child to die in a hot car
Chrysalis123
♀ Member
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't have insurance on my kids.


Donít get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well.†

Posts: 2670 | Registered: Jan 2010
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 8:08 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Re: Insurance

It is something QS and I have discussed. Just a small policy that would cover burial costs in the event of a tragedy. However we've never done it.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6227 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
southsidecali
♀ Member
Member # 22752
Default  Posted: 8:11 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

They are both sociopaths. No emotions during testimony of how horrific pain his child experiences but cries when they disclose the sexting.

He felt sorry- shame - and everything else was all about HIM..

I hope they fry him and her


Posts: 807 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: CA
southsidecali
♀ Member
Member # 22752
Default  Posted: 8:12 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

They are both sociopaths. No emotions during testimony of how horrific pain his child experiences but cries when they disclose the sexting.

He felt sorry- shame - and everything else was all about HIM..

I hope they fry him and her


Posts: 807 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: CA
latebloomer45
♀ Member
Member # 18021
Default  Posted: 8:14 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I lived in Houston 9 yeas, this seemed to happen once a year, BY ACCIDENT, and I could never believe it. That people could forget their baby. This story actually made me lose my lunch.

As to life insurance, insurance companies DO push polices, but usually at $10K, the price of a pretty nice funeral here in the Midwest. It's a waste of money, put that money in a college fund...if your kid were to die before college you'd still have some money for the funeral. Also $25K seems high for Georgia...but even if it was or wasn't about money, or sex, or freedom, it is utterly despicable.

How many people would have so happily have raised that child if they wanted out?

Whoever said they need to die the same way, Amen. Hell on earth and then hell ever after.


Me: BS 52
Him: FWS 54
Married 28 years
Son-22 Daughter-19,
D-Day #1 12/11/2007
D-Day #2 5/23/2008 fucking trickle truth!
Whatever Threnody said, I concur.


Posts: 2093 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Chicago suburbs
heme
♀ Member
Member # 40684
Default  Posted: 8:15 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We have small life insurance policies on our children, enough to cover burial expenses. I believe its 5000. I pray we NEVER ever have to worry about them. The thought of losing one of my children is something I don't want to entertain. My grandma lost my mom when my mom was in her late 30s and it tore her up so much, having children of my own I can't imagine the pain of losing one.


BS: Me (30)
WS: Husband (31)
Married 8 years, together 9
D-Day: Sept 10, 2013
D-Day2: May 31, 2014
Children: 5, ages 7, 5, 3, 1 and due in September

Leaning towards leaving, no one deserves this pain.


Posts: 205 | Registered: Sep 2013
simplydevastated
♀ Member
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 8:24 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Curious for those who have kids, do you have life insurance on them....defense keeps lowballing this as nothing ...

We had life insuranceon my son when I was working. I was laid off before my daughter was born so we couldn't afford to get one for her or to keep his going. It was through Gerber so, of memory serves, we could also use the money for college. I think that's the plan we had.

I'm sorry I read this thread, but I wanted to comment on the insurance plan.

The last time I read a story about a child dying I hugged my two so tight they actually said "Mama, you're squeezing us." I just can't bring myself to read any more.


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
debbysbaby
♀ Member
Member # 32962
Default  Posted: 8:49 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have a small $5000 policy on each of my children. It only adds something like five dollars a quarter to my own premium to have that on all kids together. It's just term life as whole life is a waste for anyone in my opinion. I'd hate to think if I went through something as horrific as losing one of my kids that I also wouldn't be able to afford to bury them.

As far as this case though, it's horrific and they're discussing the death penalty for the sick excuse of a father. I hope they do cook him.


-betrayed almost my whole almost 15 yr marriage
-divorced since 2004

Posts: 866 | Registered: Aug 2011
JanaGreen
♀ Member
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 8:51 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Re: life insurance - our insurance agent, who is also a friend, urged us to get a policy because the money can be used for college later on. He said he has one for his son, but his wife was very pissed the first time he mentioned it. After he talked to her about it she decided it was a good idea. We got one for her but I can't even remember the value of it.


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6726 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 8:53 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Curious for those who have kids, do you have life insurance on them

I do. I always have through my employer. It's 10,000.00...enough to cover funeral expenses if necessary.


I'm sorry if you don't like my Honesty, but to be fair I don't like your lies.

Sometimes it's better to push someone away...not because you stopped loving them but because you can't take the pain anymore.


Posts: 13751 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
Zolotas
♀ Member
Member # 15271
Default  Posted: 9:14 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know someone - a 24 yr old guy that left his 5 month old in the mini van - took out the other 6 kids and went in his apt and took a nap for 4 hrs..the baby baked in the mini van. He was given a four-year suspended jail sentence and 10 years supervised probation.

His wife was a member of the "pill kills" group against birth control - hence the 7 kids. Their apt was a filthy mess and authorities had been called to investigate prior to this tragedy at least 4 times. The cops investigating the death of this baby actually gagged inside the apt because of the filth.

There's something very wrong in our judicial system that this 24 yr old father is not in prison and the mother should also have faced charges for endangerment.

If anyone wants the link to this story...PM me. I don't want to post it here, but will share it privately.


Posts: 340 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: On my chair
latebloomer45
♀ Member
Member # 18021
Default  Posted: 9:38 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Off topic....about life insurance..

In general, do not insure people if you don't need their income should they die. Rarely are children providing the income. Exception being a SAHM if you would need to hire others to take her place if she died. I dropped mine by half when the younger one turned 16 and got a license, will drop the rest when she graduates college. My husband will drop his when he retires. We have prepaid funeral arrangements.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/neal-frankle/4-life-insurance-policies_b_3544296.html


Me: BS 52
Him: FWS 54
Married 28 years
Son-22 Daughter-19,
D-Day #1 12/11/2007
D-Day #2 5/23/2008 fucking trickle truth!
Whatever Threnody said, I concur.


Posts: 2093 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: Chicago suburbs
Stillstings
♀ Member
Member # 36549
Default  Posted: 11:59 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Deeply disturbing information. There was a CSI episode that was a little similar to this case.

I must say though. DH and I do not plan to have children and have had terrible things said as a result. We are wasting our fertility (We've never tried to get pregnant, so how do we know it was possible?) and it's an insult to infertile women. I'm not a real woman but an over educated bitch, he doesn't love me and must be gay, we waste our money, we should be removed from society since we do not contribute, we are selfish assholes. I am too dumb to make a decision to not have kids according to 3 doctors.

All things said to each of our faces not online. When I hear about cases like this the, "you're a terrible person for not having kids" crowd goes quiet.

Apparently this guy's mistresses were more important than his own child who died a terrible death and it makes me so sad. It makes me sick and sad to know somehow this guy and his wife get some sort of moral high ground for simply having a baby yet choose this crime.

Forgetting I can see. Researching car deaths? No, doesn't fly with me. He looked up animals dying in cars.

Buying insurance on a child? Good investment. God Forbid something bad happen, the expenses are covered. The couple in the story bought a ton which is way too much as funerals do not cost $25K. Sadly, when you take out a policy on someone regardless of age, the person does not need to be notified. Getting a small amount on a child is not morbid or selfish. It's thinking ahead which is the whole point of insurance.


Love yourself. You're worth it. Face your self. You need to do it.

Posts: 360 | Registered: Aug 2012
Dreamboat
♀ Member
Member # 10506
Default  Posted: 12:59 AM, July 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The best article on what happened in court today is cnn: http://www.cnn.com/2014/07/03/justice/georgia-hot-car-toddler-death/index.html?hpt=hp_c2

The reporting by the atlanta paper is crap in comparison.

The points that stood out to me:
* taking some to day care was part of his daily routine; Most of the hot-car-baby-deaths occur because there is a change in routine
* taking child to chick fil a was also somewhat routine -- occured 2-3 times a month;
* work was less than a mile from chick fil a
* baby was in a rear facing seat even though he was 22 months; Today we found out that the parents had a front facing seat and used it for at least a few weeks before returning to the rear facing seat
* guy (won't call him "father" or "dad") was sexting at least 6 women while at work that day, including sending one a penis photo
* guy was also reading on a reddit site for something like "Living child free"; also googled "Surviving in in prison"; that occured in the weeks prior to the baby's death
* day care sent guy an email sometime during the day; the article did not say when or what the contents were
* when the girl (not "mother"...) went to pick up baby and baby was not there, she said "Guy must of left him in the car". She then called her mother to tell her and her mother asked why she was not crying or upset
* father got into hot car where baby had been dead an estimated 4 hours; When a person dies they expire everything in their bladder and bowel; Imagine the smelliest poopy diaper baking in a hot sun, and yet he drove a couple of miles to a populated strip mall before "discovering" the dead baby;
* the police put the guy and girl together in an interview room; the girl asked if the baby looked peaceful; the guy said yes and then said "I dreaded how he would look"; Note the past tense
* they talk a while and then the girl asked the guy "Did you say too much?"
* they had TWO life insurance policies on the baby -- one that was $2000 and another that was $25000; Note that Home Depot paid for the funeral as part of a well known employee charity; In my mind that is a third insurance policy

ETA: somehow hit post before I was ready...

[This message edited by Dreamboat at 1:16 AM, July 4th (Friday)]


And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

Posts: 17630 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: A better place :)
trying_2_recover
♀ Member
Member # 28778
Default  Posted: 1:09 AM, July 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Infidelity has made me such a cynic. As soon as this started looking suspicious I thought, I bet he was having an affair and wanted out of the marriage with no child support obligation.

I'm reserving judgement on the mother since I'm confused about how they'd know she'd done a search. It may have been done under her sign in but do you know how many times someone has used my computer under my name because I forgot to sign out?

ETA: OK I went to the link provided and watched tapes of the court hearing. You all are right, mom is not acting at all as I'd expect. Damn them both!

[This message edited by trying_2_recover at 1:38 AM, July 4th (Friday)]


Posts: 241 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Washington
Lark
♀ Member
Member # 43773
Default  Posted: 1:22 AM, July 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Curious for those who have kids, do you have life insurance on them....defense keeps lowballing this as nothing ...

We do...it's a rider policy on my husband's work. In my family, there have been 4 babies who have died (all due to prematurity issues) and it's always haunted me the struggle of my cousins to have to stress about the financial side of paying for a funeral and headstone on top of mourning their baby. It was a nightmare. My one cousin was unable to put a headstone on her twins' grave for many years because they had to save up for it.

Our policy is very low tough, like $10k on each. Just enough to cover the funeral expenses and maybe one month off work to handle everything.

This story, though, breaks my heart. I read the Fatal Distraction piece and it has been one of those complete fears of mine that this would happen to my children. It makes me completely sick to think someone could have read about it, know the suffering involved in it, and done that to his son :(


"Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul." - William Ernest Henley

Posts: 516 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: California
Ostrich80
Member
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 1:50 AM, July 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Curious for those who have kids, do you have life insurance on them....defense keeps lowballing this as nothing ...

No..I can't go there but I know some do for burial insurance..I.just don't want to. I guess being prepared makes me, in my weird over thinking mind, feel like it may be used one day.


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

Posts: 5037 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
silverhopes
♀ Member
Member # 32753
Default  Posted: 2:31 AM, July 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WHY GOD??? WHY DID YOU GIVE THESE HEARTLESS PEOPLE KIDS AND NOT PEOPLE LIKE ME WHO WOULD HAVE TREASURED THE GIFT?????

I'm sorry, Guinness. This is what I meant. There are so many people in the world who would have loved and cherished that beautiful little boy.


Find peace. Or sleep on it.
Sometimes my monkeys, sometimes my circus.
Infidelities are like icebergs - they may take many different shapes and sizes, but they all damage your ship.

Posts: 3905 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: California
Lowlow
♀ Member
Member # 38653
Default  Posted: 2:47 AM, July 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Guinness23. I'm with you. As someone who is infertile, I wonder about why things like this happen. I'm not saying I would be wonder mother, but I just cry when I think to myself why worthless shitheads like that get to even kids.

As this is an affair forum, it's hard for me to separate my WS's infidelity with my infertility. And then we hear about pieces of shit who fucking murder their innocent children. Life is not fair.


Me (BS) 42 Him (FWS) 43
AP#2 (LTA EA/PA) DD #1 16 Feb 2013
AP#1 (LTA EA with my BF) DD #2 16 Nov 2013
Married 11 years, T 19 years
Reconciling

Posts: 223 | Registered: Mar 2013
LeftOutintheCold
♀ Member
Member # 42856
Default  Posted: 4:19 AM, July 4th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This happened in a county next to me here in GA. I couldn't believe the events as they unfolded. Something didn't seem right from the beginning of the news reports and I'm still just flabbergasted as the information keeps coming. What can make anyone be so heartless? May that baby be forever wrapped in love now.


Me - 42
WH - 40
Dday - 3/6/14
Married 5yrs, together over 10
Status - still separated

Posts: 330 | Registered: Mar 2014
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