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What member are you most proud of, and why?

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 painfulpast (original poster member #41038) posted at 10:12 AM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

I hope honoring others is ok. I'm not trying to exclude people, but I think certain people stand out, and I thought it would be nice to honor them.

So for the first honoree, I would like to nominate cantaccept. In a very short time, she went from trying her ass off for R, alone, while WH lied, and sadly, cheated. She held it together, She threw him out. She moved on with her life. He's back now, wanting another chance. Maybe she will, maybe she won't, but for now, she deserves our recognition for being so much stronger than she ever thought she was

Here's to you, cantaccept!!! Whooooooooo!!!

DDay - 12/2010
Fully R'd - I love my husband

posts: 2249   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2013   ·   location: East Coast
id 6861170
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FinallyHappy ( member #308) posted at 10:44 AM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

TG

and..

Nature_Girl.

The *why* probably isn't necessary.

Also a couple of old-timer guys, and a few BW's and WW's from days past.

.......and DS.

"Be civil to all; sociable to many; familiar with few; friend to one; enemy to none." ~Ben~

posts: 7670   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2002   ·   location: WI
id 6861175
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confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 11:25 AM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Aubrie....DS....cmego...20....NG....Tesla...Tred...WAL....meta....

I don't know. I could probably go on and on....

BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10



..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


posts: 15220   ·   registered: Jan. 15th, 2011
id 6861180
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MrsDoubtfire ( member #24786) posted at 11:36 AM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Nell, Jana Green, LaLa Girl, Tred, Holly-Isis, sissoon, Solus sto and Jrazz etc all for their wonderful advice and positivity.

Bufffalo for his sage advice in the early days.

Superduper wonderboy for his humour.

And DS and the gang for actually giving us this special place in the first place.

And anyone else I have forgotten to mention who has stood by me through the crap times, the early days, the lies and the R and the happily ever after times.

And a big shout out to SISTERMILKSHAKE who can offer me sound advice whilst I am peeing my pants laughing at her posts. I love you SMS.

BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now become†

posts: 1634   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2009
id 6861181
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karmahappens ( member #35846) posted at 11:52 AM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

I am proud of everyone here

Everyday we see strength and courage shining through during the most desperate of times.

The love and care, be it from hugs or 2x4's , is genuine.

I couldn't begin to name one or two without coming up with names I missed.

It takes a strong person to go through this......so I have to say I am proud of all the survivors here. ♡

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

posts: 4036   ·   registered: Jun. 13th, 2012   ·   location: Massachusetts
id 6861188
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MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 12:57 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

What karmahappens says

I am proud of everyone here

Everyone here brings with them something special to this site. While there are some here that have made a greater impact on my healing than others, as I stick around I find that each and every member is a treasure. To exclude any of them from my list would be totally impossible and unfair to them. The combination of all these treasures posting and sharing on this site is what makes this community on SI possible.

The healing stories are all different yet all of great value. From the new member that has the strength to start the 180 all the way through the member that has battled their healing journey and has moved on. There are thousands that have come before us and blazed the trail to help shape the wisdom and guidance of the healing process. There are hundreds that are on the healing journey taking time from their situation to help guide those just arriving here. Impressing on them the great example to give back.

So no matter if you are new here or a old time veteran; a betrayed, a wayward, or a madhatter; divorced or reconciling; serious or funny; eloquent with words or speak with simple straight forward answers, you are the ones that I am most proud of. Thank you for being you and making this site what it is.

posts: 54450   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2007
id 6861232
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 1:08 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

karmahappens & Moo said it perfectly.

So many wonderful people are here. Shout outs to some wouldn't be fair (in my eyes) to the hundreds and thousands of others who have helped me. A virtual hug and knowing I wasn't alone, was an amazing feeling.

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6861236
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authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 1:20 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Everybody who is brave enough to be here and ask for support, or give support to another is a hero to me.

Everybody who comes here either on a regular basis or just to check in occasionally is the member I am most proud of.

I am proud of all of us for the growth we are showing on a regular basis. You are all my heroes.

DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.

posts: 55165   ·   registered: Sep. 2nd, 2007
id 6861239
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painpaingoaway ( member #27196) posted at 2:11 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

There are many, but one particular member who suffered with an abusive POS H. She made her victim impact statement before the judge, and the judge actually cried. And when the opposing counsel tried to object, the judge told them to shut up... Teegan, you go girl!


D-Day June 2009
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

posts: 7192   ·   registered: Jan. 13th, 2010   ·   location: Coastal South
id 6861268
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painpaingoaway ( member #27196) posted at 2:21 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Oh, and I forgot about Phoenix1. Good lord what a nightmare she has been thru.

((((phoenix1))))


D-Day June 2009
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

posts: 7192   ·   registered: Jan. 13th, 2010   ·   location: Coastal South
id 6861279
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cmego ( member #30346) posted at 2:22 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

confused615...thank you.

There are so many, and for so many different reasons. Some members kick me in my ass when I need it, or give me a shoulder to cry on. Some are so sweet and yet so strong and so beautiful and they don't even know it.

I have "met" some of the most amazing people because of SI and I gain strength from all of them.

I try very hard to pay it forward to members who come on this site in similar situations than mine (ex cheating with same-sex) because I felt SO alone. So very alone. I just want to help and show people we can survive anything.

After you survive...then you thrive.

me...BS, 46 years old.
Divorced

posts: 4745   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: South
id 6861280
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 painfulpast (original poster member #41038) posted at 3:44 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

I want to add every poster that saved my ass last night here

http://survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=535251

DDay - 12/2010
Fully R'd - I love my husband

posts: 2249   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2013   ·   location: East Coast
id 6861342
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Schadenfreude ( member #43075) posted at 3:47 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Damn iPad!

[This message edited by Schadenfreude at 9:52 AM, July 5th (Saturday)]

posts: 892   ·   registered: Apr. 11th, 2014   ·   location: Midwest
id 6861346
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Schadenfreude ( member #43075) posted at 3:51 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Painfulpast. Instead of taking that leap off the ledge last night, she got beauty tips online instead!

Seriously, I am very thankful to those old members who continue to post to help we newbies with our problems even though their days of constant woe and sorrow are behind them. Too many arrive calling in the cavalry then disappear.

Especially Bigger who summarizes wisdom for JFO members with his "chose to stay or go, but you can't go as my spouse" words. If there is one phrase that summarizes what JFOs need to know,,it's that one.

[This message edited by Schadenfreude at 9:52 AM, July 5th (Saturday)]

posts: 892   ·   registered: Apr. 11th, 2014   ·   location: Midwest
id 6861353
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TrustedHer ( member #23328) posted at 4:04 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

It's a cycle.

There are old-timers who got me through my pain, and I hope I helped others, and I see newer people helping others right in front of my eyes.

Member number 45000, who hasn't joined yet, may be the one with thoughts and insight that helps countless others.

We're all in this together.

Take care of yourself. There's a great future out there. It won't come to you; you have to go to it.

posts: 5942   ·   registered: Mar. 21st, 2009   ·   location: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
id 6861371
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 painfulpast (original poster member #41038) posted at 4:09 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

I'm actually very proud of all of the members. Just reaching out is hard. It's embarrassing, even online, to say 'I'm lost - I've been cheated on. I'm scared, I'm hurt, I'm humiliated - help!!' The members here are brave beyond words, and the strength of our members is awe inspiring.

However, there is one member that really sticks out. He was dealt a shitty hand, and then another, and another. Throughout all of it, he handled himself with dignity, and self respect. Many told him that he was doing an amazing job, and he was.

SWAT70, my hat is off to you sir!

DDay - 12/2010
Fully R'd - I love my husband

posts: 2249   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2013   ·   location: East Coast
id 6861378
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20WrongsVs1 ( member #39000) posted at 4:29 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

painfulpast, thank you for staring this thread, because ITA with you honoring Can. And ((painfulpast)) I'm sorry for the crap you're going through now. That "aren't you over this yet?!" attitude from some WS is unbelievable. FTN.

Confused615, I'm honored, thank you. At the risk of t/j'ing, the kindness and acceptance you, Can, bionicgal, Kajem, DixieD, many other BW, have shown me here is overwhelming

fWW: 42
BH: 52
DDay: April 21, 2013
Sweet DS & fierce DD, under 10
Former motto: "Fake it till ya make it." Now: "You can't win if you don't play."

posts: 1523   ·   registered: Apr. 15th, 2013   ·   location: The First Coast
id 6861398
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IrishLass518 ( member #34373) posted at 8:01 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Wow, so many come to mind and the "why's" are self evident to me.

Tesla

Pass

Sunsets

NIK

5454Real

Abanondad

Allatsea

MU

Pheonix1

NG

Aubrie

and the list could go on and on. On second thought, can one of the admins just post everyone's name on my behalf?

I am so proud of us all, whether BS, WS or even an OP we have come here to seek help for ourselves and to be of service to others. That is such a huge step no matter who you are or where you are in this process.

Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

posts: 1858   ·   registered: Jan. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: WA
id 6861544
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meplusfour ( member #38958) posted at 8:31 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

The advice posted by so many has been invaluable to me. Everyone has contributed so much to make this such a safe place to come in the darkest hours. When I first read the title, two names came to mind immediately~tushnurse and LA44. Tushnurse has provided wise and sound advice to so many~she has the ability to really articulate the root of the issue and provide sound advice to the situation, whilst remaining sensitive and kind. LA44 also offers well thought out advice but also posts when life is going well and provides hope that things will improve as long as long as we remain true to what we believe is important and act accordingly.

BW (me)42
WH 44
3 daughters, 1 son
Married 10 years, together 13
DDay 3/14/2013, four year PA
In R
"Sometimes you have to accept the fact that certain things will never go back to the way they used to be."

posts: 438   ·   registered: Apr. 11th, 2013   ·   location: Canada
id 6861560
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Want2help ( member #20547) posted at 8:49 PM on Saturday, July 5th, 2014

Everyone on here has my applause, but particularly those on the OC board.

Losfer, who is a great man with wonderful insight.

BMC, for loving the OCs created by her H and OW, even loving them after finding out 2 of the 3 were not her H's.

So many others, who took in children conceived from infidelity and showed those children love, and gave them a functioning adult to look up to. I don't know that everyone is capable of such compassion, and it gives me hope.

[This message edited by Want2help at 2:49 PM, July 5th (Saturday)]

FBS/WS- me.
F(serial)WS/BS- him.

Madhatters. More Ddays than birthdays, at this point. His OC, my OC...

UPDATE: Divorcing after almost 20 years.

posts: 2588   ·   registered: Aug. 7th, 2008
id 6861571
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