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Newest Member: BellaBoo (44915)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: he abused my kids....wow...
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 1:53 AM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so horrified for you and your sweet kids. You are their champion and I'm so proud of you for all the hard work you are doing on their behalf.

Sending good thoughts, prayers, and love to you and your children.

(((teeghan)))


I bow to those who keep their hearts open when it is most difficult, those who refuse to keep their armor on any longer than they have to, those who recognize the courage at the heart of vulnerability. - Jeff Brown

Posts: 17296 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
bigskyblues
♂ Member
Member # 36759
Default  Posted: 5:19 AM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Teegahn, I don't have a lot to say other than you and your children are in my thoughts and prayers!

I wish you and your little ones the best!
BSB


BH 50s
xWW 50s

Dday1 7-2012
Dday2 8-2012
Divorce 9-2012

4 kids all adults.

Married 22+ years.

I have moved on and life is good!


Posts: 230 | Registered: Sep 2012
simplydevastated
♀ Member
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 6:52 AM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would love to be in that room when the question them. With all the evidence you have how can deny or justify it.

They are monsters.

I'm keeping you and your babies in my thoughts and prayers.

(((Hugs)))


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
Jomarion
♀ Member
Member # 43659
Default  Posted: 5:22 PM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Teeghan, I am speechless. I can't offer much advice except to keep a diary, journal anything else your kids say, also document what they say emotionally. It may help your case.

You are taking such good care of your kids. Remember to take care of yourself too. Your self-care will help them in the long run.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your brave, intelligent children.


me:BGF, 54, American immigrant. one son. me and my ex get along great, the most amicable split imaginable!
him:WBF,43, Polish immigrant
together since 2006,
DDay:October28,2009,after his 3 teen kids push him to cheat with OW.
5 betrayed me

Posts: 191 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: UK
dmari
♀ Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 6:08 PM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((teeghan and children)))))


Me (BS): 42 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Settled at mediation
Officially divorced ... SOON!

Posts: 2191 | Registered: Oct 2012
TheGivingTree
♀ New Member
Member # 43672
Default  Posted: 7:35 PM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nothing to add except that my heart hurts for your babies. I am pretty sure I would become violent if someone hurt my kids.


Me: FBW, 48. Him: SAFWH, 57 (SFGary)
3 fantastic kids: DS 16, DS 15, DD 10
DDay 1: 1/8/13, multiple DDays with TT for an entire year.

Working hard at R.
If all you wanted was love, why would you use me up, cut me down, build a boat and sail aw


Posts: 42 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: San Francisco
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 9:23 PM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Gods below, lady. I wish to hell I was in your neck of the woods to bring you dinner and a bottle of wine. (((hugs)))


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4802 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Stay strong, Mama! ((((HUGS)))


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9650 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
nekorb
♀ Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 10:43 PM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WTF teeghan!

You just remember to breathe and stay right where you are when the urge to beat the ever living shit out of your ex and his mom starts to become unbearable. The kids need you not to be in jail once their POS father is incarcerated.

What a horrific experience for your babies. I am so, so sorry that happened and hope that this incident will keep him away from them for a very long time.

He's a horrible person.

YOU are an awesome mom. You hang in there. You can do this. High road, honey.


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
teeghan
♀ Member
Member # 40859
Default  Posted: 8:51 AM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all for the thoughts...

Oh I have had to fight the urge to just go and take justice into my own hands...trust me....

It has now been 16 days later - and MY SON still has marks very visible all over his legs, and his ankles and tops of his feet.... I just do not understand how someone can do that to a child..... I look at my kids, and I cant even spank them...let alone draw blood from head to toe like that.

I have been keeping a journal with all info they give me and when. I also make note about what our discussion was about, what their demanor was (crying, panic attack, sleeples nights - we have had a lot of sleepless nights this week) etc. I continue to take UPDATED pics as well so that you can see that even 16 days later - the spots on my son have still not healed. 16 days later..... WTF......

The detective is to come out to the house this week to talk to my kids. My son wrote a letter to my daughter the other day telling her he was sorry. He kept saying I know you are probably sad and I am very sorry. I asked him why he wrote it, and he said because he couldnt protect her. It broke my heart. And I told him I was sorry that I had not been there to protect both of them either as they do not deserve this. It literally makes me feel SICK. I will let you know how this week goes with detectives and with interview of the grandmother and him. That interview wont be until a week from today as the grandmother is on vacation until saturday. Glad to see they get to enjoy themselves while my kids are here suffering physically and emotionally.

I was told they will bring her in, *interview her* and then probably go after a warrant while she waits in the interview room - as most of said, with these injuries there is no real getting out of this. I also have to find out when they will be going after him for the other stuff that he did as well.

My daughter did inform me that she begged nightly to go home and was told you cant go home. Then was yelled at because she was "home" and she told him no she wasnt. Then she begged nightly to call her mom and they told her no that she couldnt speak to mommy. They kept telling her I was alseep and she said well wake her up, she told me I could call and they flat out told her no. The only times they were allowed to call me was around 7pm each night when he would school them before they called and threatened to get a spanking if they didnt keep it short, and that they were having a blast. I kept asking if all was ok because they were very quiet and they kept saying yes they just missed me. I get so upset and teary eyed thinking about them sitting on the other end of the phone not being able to really tell me they need help.

I am going to be filing in junvenile court as well to have any and all rights removed due to neglect, abuse, and best interest of the children.

Thank you all again for letting me vent - I do not really have anyone in my real life I can truly vent to so it is nice to be able to let it out here. Thank you!


Posts: 111 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Georgia
nekorb
♀ Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 9:04 AM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Teeghan I cannot even imagine how you feel. I feel awful and they aren't my kids!

I'm glad they are going after these horrid people. Did they seriously think they were going to get away with this?

Are your kids in IC? That letter from your son to his sister speaks volumes about what his little heart is carrying.


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
teeghan
♀ Member
Member # 40859
Default  Posted: 10:36 AM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes they are in counseling and so am I. They had a counseling sesesion scheduled yesterday but the play therapist got into an accident and had to cancel. They are rescheduled for Wednesday. Thankfully she was ok - but had to go be checked out for her right foot.

I am almost certain that they have not told me everything. My son before was holding back a lot from me and telling his conselor. She did not tell me everything he said in case she needed to be called into court - but did tell me then that this monster should never be left alone with my kids - and at that time the stupid idiot got unsupervised visitation that was supervised. I was a bit in shock.... and all had been going ok the last 1.5 months until this visit. I just feel like such a fool.

I do know that my daughter did tell her dad that she hates him. It takes A LOT for that child to stand up to someone. She is always afraid she will hurt someones feelings. She didnt care this time though.... she really meant it when she said she hated him.

:( Thank you all for thoughts and prayers... please continue to keep us in your thoughts. We need it.


Posts: 111 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Georgia
softballmom
♀ New Member
Member # 44171
Default  Posted: 12:35 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh my gosh! I just read through your post. There are hardly words for such an awful thing. You and your kiddos are in my thoughts and prayers. I Am very glad your kids have such a great mom yo support and protect them! Best wishes are with you guys!!

Posts: 12 | Registered: Jul 2014
heme
♀ Member
Member # 40684
Default  Posted: 2:13 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh poor babies and mommy.. You did everything you could, you didn't fail your children the system did.
((teeghan))


BS: Me (30)
WS: Husband (31)
Married 8 years, together 9
D-Day: Sept 10, 2013
D-Day2: May 31, 2014
Children: 5, ages 7, 5, 3, 1 and due in September

Leaning towards leaving, no one deserves this pain.


Posts: 205 | Registered: Sep 2013
Rubix
♀ Member
Member # 44099
Default  Posted: 2:33 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a horrific thing to happen. If I found out anything like that happened to my DD I would really struggle not to take things into my own hands, but you're doing the right thing. What an EVIL little ... Ahh there are no words for THAT. Thoughts with you and your kids Hun. Sending you lots of strength to! (((teeghan)))


BW: me (25)WH: him (28-remorsefulHubby)
kids: mine:DD 5 ours:DS new born. Days old.
Married: 5 months
D-Day: 13/06/2014 - craigslist account. Secret hotmail account.
D-Day 2: 9/8/2014 find out he cheated a week before our wedding

Posts: 120 | Registered: Jul 2014 | From: Northamptonshire
determinata
Member
Member # 42124
Default  Posted: 8:47 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Teeghan,
I am so, so sorry for the torture inflicted upon your babies. Please continue to be strong for your kids. You will get them *and yourself* through this. It's such an awful thing to happen but they will heal and you will help them. You are in my thoughts.


M 2007. DDay 2008
~10+ CL Prostitutes in 8 months
Divorcing SAWH "ActionsOverWords"
Me: Early 30s BW (also an adult OC) w Baby DS

6 years of TT, hidden STD & false R
Separated 5 mos+; he will not commit
Someday I will be okay


Posts: 288 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 9:20 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just wanted to check in and tell you that you and your babies are in my prayers. (((hugs)))


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4802 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
hopefulmother
♀ Member
Member # 38790
Default  Posted: 9:34 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So sorry. My prayers are going out for you and your two babies. I just hope that nothing more happened. I think all of us want to jump through our comps and perform some Boondock Saints Justice on these two pieces of shit.


Me-BW 39
WH-39
D-day 9-4-12
Major TT 8-14
Friends for 20yrs dating since 2000
Married 9yrs with 2 toddlers
My wedding band is a symbol of hope, forgiveness, love, and grace.

Posts: 933 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: PA
PurpleRose
♀ Member
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 9:50 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow, I'm so sad for you all! This is horrendous.

I am so impressed with your ability to get this taken care of quickly. You are a champion to your kids right now. Stay strong!


divorced the Dooosh
*****************************
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
~dodinsky

Posts: 3580 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 10:02 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((teeghan)))

You keep on doing the right thing. You are so strong and setting a great example for those kids about how to handle adversity.

Hug those babies.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5808 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
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