The other day at a store we saw the last OW (used to be one of my good friends) and I was triggered horribly. I moved off to the side of the exit (we were all leaving at the same time) to let her leave, WH stood right beside me and showed the most concern and understanding I have ever seen from him. He apologized and said we could stand there as long as I needed to. He really gets how upsetting this is and it is really this book that helped him see the BS side of things. So glad I bought it.
Now that we are in IC and MC, the book is STILL useful as it lays everything out clearly. he feels the book is accurate from his perspective and helps him gain insight into what he's done. I feel the book is accurate from my perspective and understands what I need to feel safe.
I think it'd be a good book to keep referring to over the months and years.
And here's the thing--during the NC phone call to OW, he actually recommended it to her, quoted from it, and urged her to confess to her BH.
I think this is an excellent book, certainly one of the best.
D-Day: August 14, 2012
9 year LTA with former co-worker and family "friend"/7 years EA+PA, 2 more years EA
Our MC was so amazed at the change in my WH, he ordered the book and tells my WH to go back and reread certain chapters.
Unbeknownst to me, my WH had taken his affair underground for the 5 months after Dday 1. Reading the book apparently brought him out of his fog and he broke it off with her two days later.
We also liked "Not Just Friends". Now I'm looking for another book for him...perhaps titled "I'm a Complete Asshole".