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Newest Member: Ugh123 (44903)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Ugh. Post divorce long distance R ended
Salt
♀ Member
Member # 43726
Default  Posted: 1:18 AM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks WB. I'm divorced 2 years. I haven't really been alone for nearly 30 some odd years, minus a couple of years along the way. I think I need time perhaps. I've come such a long way already…..

I've always been very security conscious. Perhaps because I moved nearly every year of my life growing up, it affected my adult choices.

Perhaps this is the best thing for me, and I'm just glimpsing the edges of it. I'm in that space where I want to be on my own, I like being independent of a relationship/ the freedom etc, and at the same time I don't want to be alone / fears for the unknown future, etc.

I feel vulnerable. Living alone what does one do if one gets sick? I mean really sick, not the flu? Or any number of the things that can happen to a person? I always thought I would have my husband and we would have each other's back. It's really an adjustment for me to feel alone and vulnerable to life's curves. How do you handle it WB? Do you just not think about it? Trust that in the moment of need, it will appear? This is new ground for me….

[This message edited by Salt at 1:19 AM, July 19th (Saturday)]


BS, 54 Divorced 2012
I read and walked for miles at night along the beach, writing bad blank verse and searching endlessly for someone wonderful who would step out of the darkness and change my life. It never crossed my mind that that person would be me.

Posts: 89 | Registered: Jun 2014
InnerLight
♀ Member
Member # 19946
Default  Posted: 9:47 AM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When you get sick you call on neighbors and friends and family. It forces you to explore and develop your network. It takes a village to care for each person. Many of our villages are in tatters but when you are not distracted by an SO you can do more work to rebuild them.


BS, age 53, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years and 20 together. dating again, living in the sticks with a cat. It's taking a long time to create new dreams and a new life but it is slowly coming together.

Posts: 5813 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
Salt
♀ Member
Member # 43726
Default  Posted: 1:31 PM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes this is true. It's what I had to do for the 3 surgeries I had after ex and I separated. But it was rough..so rough to do it alone. 6 months ago my mom passed away suddenly. We were very close. I keep having to be strong. Her burial at Arlington National Cemetery is coming up in Sept.

It's a state of mind. I'm trying to work through it. It's just these losses take me back....


BS, 54 Divorced 2012
I read and walked for miles at night along the beach, writing bad blank verse and searching endlessly for someone wonderful who would step out of the darkness and change my life. It never crossed my mind that that person would be me.

Posts: 89 | Registered: Jun 2014
Topic Posts: 23
Pages: 1 · 2

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