YOP - as far as I am concerned, so long as anything you want to say is in accordance with the rules of SI you are welcome to a t/j or two. So no apology necessary.
I agree BecomingMe, please stick around. Many of us have been through a lot, done a lot, and are working on a lot. But we are here as a community to support each other in our healing.
Some of the consequences we face as WS make perfect sense. Some of them feel "just" or "fair" or at least deserved. But other people continuing the degradation, deceit, and bad choices is not a consequence that sits well with me.
Not believing it would happen to me is the part of it that I am struggling with most. How stupid was it of me to think that I wouldn't be further disrespected in this way? There is another thread from pizzalover where she talks about the lies she told herself.
I told myself that my APs were "honorable" men. That they were interested because they respect me. That I needed the ego kibbles that they handed me.
But when I think about the potential for sharing of my images... These were not honorable men, just as I was not an honorable woman. These men did not respect me. If they had respected me they would have treated me as "off limits." And since I know that is true, I also know that they were anything but trustworthy.
My BH on the other hand, is.