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Newest Member: AmIDreaming41 (45703)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Was It Worth It
movingforward13
♀ Member
Member # 38405
Default  Posted: 8:52 AM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

For those of you who have found love again after your divorce, especially to those who are remarried, was everything you went through concerning infidelity worth it to have what you have now?

I am struggling with this.... And trying to sort of out feelings to figure out what is really bothering me.


Once a cheater, always a cheater happens when your cheater doesn't have remorse.
Regret is not remorse- know the difference!

Posts: 643 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: DC
InnerLight
♀ Member
Member # 19946
Default  Posted: 9:41 AM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Worth it?

It is just hard to assign worth to something so hideous.

Am I stronger and wiser? Yes.
Am I happier? In some ways, yes, in some ways, no.
Have a learned a lot about myself? Hell, yes!


BS, now age 53, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

Posts: 5893 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
Williesmom
♀ Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 4:29 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have not found love again, and I've been divorced for 6 years. It has been totally worth it.

My life is mine now. I have met some very nice people that I wouldn't have otherwise met (male and female).

I have gotten to do so many cool things. If I die tomorrow, I feel that this has been a life well lived.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7811 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 4:49 PM, July 20th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had a brief fling with love post D. It was a wild ride but it wasn't meant to be. I weathered it much better than the situation with the X

Like Williesmom, I'm enjoying my single life--immensely!


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20429 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
bigskyblues
♂ Member
Member # 36759
Default  Posted: 5:53 AM, July 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know that I can say it was "worth it."

I learned a lot from the experience though, and I can say I am happier now than I have been in a very long time. Life is good and for the most part the infidelity trauma is gone from my life.

BSB


BH 50s
xWW 50s

Dday1 7-2012
Dday2 8-2012
Divorce 9-2012

4 kids all adults.

Married 22+ years.

I have moved on and life is good!


Posts: 273 | Registered: Sep 2012
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 7:33 AM, July 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Is what worth it?

Putting my life together after he left? Taking care of myself? Choosing to find reasons to be happy? Focusing on the positive things? Trying to date again? (I have so far only had moderate success with that)

I don't really understand the question.

I never questioned whether moving on was worth it. What alternative is there? Being a miserable sad sack mired in the past dwelling on what could have been?

That's a no brainer for me.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13855 | Registered: Jul 2011
Topic Posts: 6

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