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User Topic: Coffee
ChangeMaker
♂ Member
Member # 43899
Default  Posted: 8:39 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love coffee. It's my one regular, true vice. Sure, I drink alcohol a little, but I drink coffee. Regularly. Every day. All day.

I'm finding now though, that it is making me anxious about my situation (ending relationship with WW). Yesterday was very bad, I just had negative, circular thoughts all day long.

I might have to get some decaf going.


"Everything works if you let it." - Travis W. Redfish

DDay - June 7, 2014
Me - 43
WW - 41
DD - 6 and 3
Pulling the Plug


Posts: 325 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: Ontario
norabird
♀ Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 8:43 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love coffee. I had insomnia, full-out inability to sleep without ambien, for a month during non-OT appropriate time. It's only the last few weeks that I'm back to where I can drink coffee the way I'm used to (as a nightcap as well as a morning drink!).

Just one of those weird bubbles. I cut it out because of fear over staying awake during the insomnia, then it took a while for my caffeine tolerance AND my fear over tossing and turning all night to go away.

Go with decaf for now, but don't worry, coffee will welcome you back one day.

And find some way of deflecting those negative thoughts. Meditation? exercise? A walk? It's hard to derail our brains sometimes but any little bit helps.


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4173 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
ChangeMaker
♂ Member
Member # 43899
Default  Posted: 9:14 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good advice Norabird,

I've been running a lot, gradually working up to a 5k. I have also been meditating, though it has become much harder to clear my mind since D-Day.

I've been keeping myself pretty busy, but the coffee just makes me crazy.


"Everything works if you let it." - Travis W. Redfish

DDay - June 7, 2014
Me - 43
WW - 41
DD - 6 and 3
Pulling the Plug


Posts: 325 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: Ontario
GabyBaby
♀ Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 9:21 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm late to the coffee crowd (having been a life-long lover of tea), but man its good stuff.

I'm an oddball in that I don't feel the "jolt" that caffeine gives many, so I can drink it all day. I have bouts of insomnia as well and some things that consistently help me:
1. A good workout a few hours before bed
2. Making sure the room is dark (no lights from electronics, etc).
3. Lowering the lights about an hour before I'm ready for bed to get my mind/body into sleep mode (the darker room starts to settle my mind)
4. Something warm to drink (preferrably sipped in the darkened room).

Hope that helps!


Me - 40s
SorryInSac - WH#2 - 40s. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - ??

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW)
Legally married 18yrs, together 16.5yrs

I edit often for clarity.


Posts: 6443 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
JanaGreen
♀ Member
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 10:38 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I sympathize because I love coffee, but man, it can really, REALLY affect your anxiety levels. I would definitely suggest some decaf. If you need to cut down instead of going cold turkey (I completely understand how much that sucks!) Green Mountain makes half-caff K-cups.


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6744 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
StillGoing
♂ Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 11:14 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I started drinking coffee back when I started working, around 14, because the place I worked was a cafe and, well, I just had that shit going all day. I drank about 3 or more pots a day.

Kicking that habit was somewhere between quitting smoking and getting my drinking under control. I actually had the shakes from quitting coffee long enough to get it out of my system. Anymore I drink maybe 1 or 2 cups a day, the lower caffiene also means less heartburn for me.


“Fate is a fickle bitch who dotes on irony.”

Posts: 7450 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
Rebreather
♀ Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 11:29 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We moved to 50/50 about 18 months ago when dh was diagnosed with high blood pressure. I went full decaf about 6 months ago. Don't miss it. I drank about 4 cups in the morning, so not the worst habit. I feel so.much.better. w/out the caffeine.

Anyway, you may get some relief from going 50/50 first.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6455 | Registered: Jan 2011
sadone29
♀ Member
Member # 38597
Default  Posted: 11:35 AM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had to quit coffee. I was getting palpitations and it was making my anxiety so much worse. I miss it! I really was drinking way too much of it though. I looked up how much caffeine I was taking in and was really surprised by the number.


DDay Feb. 28, 2013
5 year long EA (still believe PA), webcam girls, contacting hookers
Preparing for D

Posts: 730 | Registered: Mar 2013
purplejacket4
♀ Member
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 12:09 PM, July 25th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree. Go to half caf first. Quitting cold turkey can make you sick.


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2196 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
Not.the.Big.Easy
♂ Member
Member # 2569
Default  Posted: 7:43 PM, July 26th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I used to drink a lot of coffee, probably about 8 pots a day. My housemate was the same and so the rule in our house was if you empty the pot, you refill the pot. The coffee maker was running all day. Basically because our coffee "cups" held just about a pot.

I was working at a construction site across from a Starbucks (I know it's bad coffee, but it was the nearest coffee). On the second day of going there they gave me free coffees for being such a good customer.

When I met my wife, she was surprised because I could drink a 24oz coffee just before bed and go right to sleep. Thanks to her belief that it was bad for me, I've gradually cut down my coffee consumption so I usually only have 48oz of coffee a day.


Me: BH (44)
Her: WW (37)(EAish)
Dday 7/23/14
Dday #2 9/9/14
Remorse? Safety
D/R? who knows...

Posts: 128 | Registered: Oct 2003 | From: Vermont
Want2help
♀ Member
Member # 20547
Default  Posted: 11:44 PM, July 26th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Coffee makes me SO anxious. I switched to yerba mate (tea), and i'm heavily caffeinated, no jitters or anxiety.


BS- me.
FWS- him.
DDay 6/07 (immediately separated)
RDay 8/07
OC born 3/08
OC Adopted 2014

Reconciled


Posts: 2271 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: PNW
StartingFreshNow
♀ Member
Member # 44224
Default  Posted: 10:44 AM, July 28th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have a sign on my desk "No Coffee, No Workee". It's true for me - it takes me until 9 to finish my mug of coffee and I guarantee what gets done in that time is something my 5 year old can do.


Me: WW
2 young kids
DDay - Dec 2013 (EA), TT
DDay 2 - Jul 28, 2014 (PA), TT
DDay 3 - end of Aug/beg of Sep 2014
(All the same A)

Posts: 284 | Registered: Jul 2014 | From: USA
Topic Posts: 12

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