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Newest Member: whathappensnext (45075)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: NC - need to stay strong!
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 6:50 PM, August 1st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just received an email

"I will miss many things about you but I won't miss your lies"

I so want to respond, I am fighting myself to not respond. So here are my choices that I will not say to him.

1. At least you have something to miss
2. Yes, I lied, I lied about my girlfriends, I lied about my past, I lied about my drug use, I lied about who I am inside, I lied about trying to R with you, I lied in MC, I lied in IC, well no, that was you not me
3. I will not miss you at all, there is nothing to miss.
4. Cheaters handbook, blameshifting, easing your guilt by creating faults in your betrayed spouse, helps you look in the mirror.


I will not send any of these but damn do I want to!

I guess I didn't have to wait long for the shift, here it comes and if he is drinking look out! He can be corrosive.


Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced 8/5/14


Posts: 1361 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
nekorb
♀ Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 6:53 PM, August 1st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nope. You are correct, Crickets to that bait. Even though it smells really good!

But no.

You forgot my favorite.

1. Fuck off.


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, August 1st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you Nekorb, you made me laugh!


Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced 8/5/14


Posts: 1361 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 7:01 PM, August 1st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In a kind of sick twisted way, I almost wish he would keep them coming, just for tonight.

It helps me to remember all those nights when he called me names, attacked my character, it validates my thoughts and feelings, as if I need more validation!

It just reminds me of who he really is under the mask of "kindness". It really is a mask, he is not kind, he is not nice, only when there are witnesses. This man, if you could call him that, fucked with my mind, fucked with my heart.

Last week he sent me a text, "I hope that you suffer as much for the pain that you caused me as I suffer".

Holy shit! That is remorse at it's finest!!! In the twilight zone.


Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced 8/5/14


Posts: 1361 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 8:26 PM, August 1st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I texted my best friend about the email, I love this man, I have known him since I was 11. To have a friend for that many years is such a gift, he knows me and I know him. I really do have so much to be grateful for.

His reply to me, "He just wants to bug you. Ignore him. He is evil. You are GOOD!!!You are kind. You are thoughtful, you are loving. You create order and beauty around you. You make me happy whenever I think of you. You share. You care.

I could go on but I am walking the dog. Ignore that sick person. He still wants to hurt you.

Those are words from a friend, someone that has known me my whole life, my good and my bad. Those are words from a friend that loves me.

That is what I need in my life, people like him, that is what we all need in our lives.

This is what I wish for everyone here, a friend that loves you and can support you, a friend that knows you and can remind you of how fucking awesome you really are. A friend to help keep you strong.


Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced 8/5/14


Posts: 1361 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
GotPlayed
♂ Member
Member # 41294
Default  Posted: 8:57 PM, August 1st (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's the dog nipping at your heels one last time because he knows it's almost over.

You can set up a rule on your email system to delete his messages, or mark them read and file then somewhere. That way you only get the emails when you choose to see them (though if there's no kids or finances to discuss, might as well auto delete them).

Your friend is right. You deserve peace. You don't have to put up with harassment

Home stretch.


Master of my Fate, Captain of my Soul.
BS 42, WW 41. 18y married
DD: 11/5/13
DS10 Autism, DD8
OM: Reformed wife-beater ex-con
D filed 1/14/14 by WW (never warn them, they'll get ahead)
Married a powder keg

Posts: 749 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: California
Topic Posts: 6

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