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Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Working on Reconciliation but feel like DD again?
OkNotOk
♀ New Member
Member # 44229
Default  Posted: 9:48 AM, August 8th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This truly is the hardest thing ever.


WH had finally got "it". Even though we were working on reconciliation before and kept TT for several weeks.


That was last week. This week, I'm being hit with overwhelming sadness, hurt, anxiety, all initial feelings after the dd are back.

Is this cyclic?



Posts: 39 | Registered: Jul 2014
devasted30
♀ Member
Member # 39439
Default  Posted: 12:04 PM, August 8th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Absolutely. Extremely normal. Sometimes, the brain can deal with it and sometimes it can't. Ergo, you push it aside and other times you just cannot. The TT is a killer. It sets the clock back to Zero. I vacillate constantly but, the good news, not as often after 19 months and not for as long.

Posts: 1227 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Ontario, Canada
devasted30
♀ Member
Member # 39439
Default  Posted: 12:04 PM, August 8th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Duplicate post

[This message edited by devasted30 at 12:04 PM, August 8th (Friday)]


Posts: 1227 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Ontario, Canada
ScarlettA1
♀ Member
Member # 43533
Default  Posted: 1:00 PM, August 8th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think it cycles for awhile. My BH bounced around with so many different emotions the first three months. It doesn't happen as often but I recognize it and I have asked him to explain what he's going through.
I'm so sorry you find yourself here. I wish you peace.


Be Wise, Be Kind, Be True

WW 47(me)
BH 49
dday 3/19/14
11 mo EA/PA


Posts: 51 | Registered: May 2014 | From: United States
OkNotOk
♀ New Member
Member # 44229
Default  Posted: 3:11 PM, August 8th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The TT is definitely a killer.


He finally understands this and he was really just protecting himself by not giving the whole story.


And thanks, I wish it would stop. My whole world is spinning and stopping without any control.


And at times I've thought, was I really happy? He was so awful to me the whole 16 months that the A went on. He made me want a divorce.

and for some reason, I can't remember before that. And we've been together 30yrs.

30!


Posts: 39 | Registered: Jul 2014
hihn
♀ Member
Member # 43986
Default  Posted: 8:46 PM, August 8th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

TT is truly a healing killer! I have dealt with it for 6 months, I think/hope it is now done rearing it's ugly face. My WH insisted on giving me full disclosure last week. I think he expected me to react differently than I did. But as I told him "after he told me about the 20+ sex partners in our 26 years together what difference would 30+ make" however, there was one thing he did to one of these women that made me feel horrible ashamed that someone living under my roof could be capable of doing to another person, it was subhuman of him. Apparently 13yrs ago a drunk women approximately 50yrs old came to our doors saying she had no money & needed $20.00 to get home. My WH told her he would give her the money if she had sex with him, so she did. I felt like he might as well have raped the woman.


Me BS 58yo
Him WS 55yo, porno & sex addict
DD#1 1/28/14 co-worker#1 1991
DD#2 2/8/14 co-worker#2 9/13 - 4/14,he moved in with OW 3/9/14, moved out from OW 4/8/14
DD#3 4/10/14 22+ anonymous sex OW
Full disclosure 7/30/14 30+ sex parteners
TT is

Posts: 101 | Registered: Jul 2014 | From: colorado
Topic Posts: 6

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