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Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: What are you doing for R?
♀ Member
Member # 41884
Default  Posted: 1:11 AM, August 11th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We worked to get our sailboat ready for our cruise next week. That is normally his job; organizing, cleaning, looking over motor etc, but we chose to do it together this year. This is especially significant because last year, he could not go through with this trip. He literally turned the boat around and said, I cannot do this. We are going home.... We were all shocked, had no idea why, but of course I know EXACTLY why now. He was too guilty because of what he had done the week before (affair went from EA to PA). Simply devastating, but we are working hard as a team in an effort to ease my anxiety about the upcoming trip. We actually had a great day in between the moments that my nerves got the best of me. We even had a man on another boat hess, "Hey, can I take a picture to show my wife? How'd you get her to work on the boat with you?!" If he only knew!!!

[This message edited by Neverwudaguessed at 1:15 AM, August 11th (Monday)]

BW: 44 Me
DDay1 9-9-13 (18th Wedding Anniversary) 6 wk EA, 1 wk PA
DDay2: 10-25-13 EA/PA with same OW 12 1/2 years ago for 3 months
OW: XGF Predator who never stopped pursuing WH
DS 13
DD 11

Posts: 731 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York
♀ Member
Member # 44154
Default  Posted: 12:09 PM, August 11th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would like to echo SoulShine and add to my previous "what we are doing for R" comment. :)

Yesterday was one of the best days we have had! Granted, we are only about a month out from DDay, and I wish it hadn't taken this amount of pain for us to realize how much we mean to each other. WH and I have been together 5 years, and he has worked pretty much every single weekend (yes Saturday and Sunday) this entire time. He just started a new job in which he pretty much has every Sunday off and some Saturdays. I can't even begin to explain how therapeutic it is to just have TIME together! We went to brunch yesterday, and spent 3 1/2 hours lingering over our food, mimosas and each other. Neither of us touched our phones, and we had an amazing conversation talking about so much from our past, our present and our future. After brunch, we deep cleaned and detailed my car together. This made WH happy because my car was pretty dirty from going to the beach recently. After that we planned our meals for the week, grocery shopped and then did laundry. It seems pretty typical but chores are usually something I do a lone when he is working on the weekend, so it was much more enjoyable to bond over it and just spend an entire day being a "team"!

I agree that when I see couples on their phones at dinner or out together, it reminds me of my WH and I, and I am so thankful we have had a wake up call (wish it would have been something less painful) but we have committed to everyday making it a point to really connect with each other!

The night ended with us laying in bed and talking for another hour. I really didn't think much about the A yesterday at all which is a huge relief. It's hardest for me when I am away from him like today being at work. :( Great weekend though!

Me: BW, 28
Him: WH, 28
DDAY 7/4/14 TT till 7/18/14

"Reconciliation means working together to correct the legacy of past injustice." - Nelson Mandela

Posts: 249 | Registered: Jul 2014
Topic Posts: 22
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